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Showing content with the highest reputation on 14/07/17 in all areas

  1. Hi Jan, I think you have been suffering form a build up of events and you've just blown a gasket! Your organising skills are still in there somewhere, you just need a bit more time to plan and prepare than you did before, that's all. Get used to writing things down and use a methodical approach to get through the various tasks you set yourself. Tiredness doesn't help, so stop when your body tells you to and rest. You only make mistakes if you try to go on. Take a day out where your only task is to go and buy that dress and maybe stop for a coffee with whoever you choose to go with you. Enjoy the day! Start to enjoy the preparations for your wedding rather than seeing it as a job. What matters is that you and John enjoy that day. What everyone else does and says is irrelevant. It is your day, not theirs, and if you want to go dressed in a bin bag and John turns up dressed like a village yokel, chewing on a straw, then so what? Have you read the leaflet that comes with your drug? What are the side effects - are they contributing to your feelings, rather than relieving them? For instance, does the drug cause drowsiness, when you are already suffering fatigue as a result of the SAH? (therefore potentially doubling the effect of tiredness and therefore affecting your mood?) Can it cause you to be irritable? I don't know, because I am not a doctor, but if anything like that can occur then maybe you should chat with your GP about changing your prescription. If you have been prescribed anything like that, then arise Doctor Alfie!!! Good luck Jan! Macca
    4 points
  2. Hi Jan, Again some wonderful responses with good advice. As others have suggested, it may be a touch of depression returning without you realising it. I say that because I went to my gp about 8 weeks ago, not feeling depressed, just that my head felt full of fog, I was crying regularly, sleeping too much and that I was not coping as well as I had been. I was also concerned that the amount of stress I seem to attract was not doing my head any good. Result she signed me off for 3 weeks with 'depression'. Since that first appointment I have been signed off for a further 7 weeks. My sicknote said 'depression, nos' - I then looked that up nos, thinking it was 'no other symptoms' - it is not that, lol, its Not Otherwise Specified - it's put on for depressive disorders that are impairing but do not fit any of the officially specified diagnoses. I have done much research on the subject and it is a known fact that depression is a common after effect of sah. Having little or no interest in things can be a symptom of depression. Depression too is a bit like an umbrella for all sorts of mental health issues, you don't necessarily need to feel down, it can be a whole host of things that cause human beings to feel the way we do - having a brain injury/sah as we all know can alter the way we were and everything can feel so much more difficult to handle. It is frustrating! For those of us who have suffered a sah, there is little wonder we experience feelings that are not ones we perhaps had prior to it happening. Anyway, I'll try and post in the GR regarding family support - essential, but not always forthcoming. I'm not sure if you've had any counselling, but it can be very useful to discuss your issues with someone outside of the family - I'm not sure if Headway may be able to make recommendations re 'neuro' counsellors, but I've often thought speaking to someone with knowledge of sah would be more helpful than an ordinary counsellor. Although I didn't want to be put on antidepressants I did agree to try Sertraline and I do feel that I am coping better now than I was just prior to starting the tablets. Having gone from too much sleep, I'm now not getting enough and keep waking in the early hours - so I've still a way to go before my 'normality' returns! Wishing you all the best Jan, Sarah
    4 points
  3. Hi - I've used Titanium as my 'stage name' as, along with platinum, it's one of the sturdiest metals and that's why it's often used to decorate (aka repair) our brains. Firstly if you're a fellow SAH survivor reading this I want you to pat yourself on the back as the quoted SAH death rates vary from 45% to 80% within a month, combine that with the fact there are only 8-10k cases in the UK every year so some GPs only have one patient during their whole career then I think we're doing well! Especially when people hear you've had a brain haemorrhage they always have a tale of a relative or friend who had one too but they weren't lucky enough to wake up again. I had my first SAH in August 2010 (no headache previous to it) - I was walking on a treadmill at the time so have realised that I shouldn't believe what they say - exercise is actually bad for you! The SAH was clipped and I went through the learning curve pretty quickly as I run my own business so had to be on the ball to pay my staff wages at the end of the month. Part of me wanted to be able to be at home to do a proper recovery but the other part of me knew that I could do that for a long time but going back to work would still exhaust me whenever it happened and by having to use my brain it got it back into the groove quicker. As I was only 38 at the time I knew I was lucky in that youth was on my side. I had my second SAH on Friday 13th (previously my lucky date) in 2015 - again with no headache prior and literally just heading off to work. This time they looked to see if they could coil and they were able to so I avoided having hair like a nest this time. Within 8 weeks afterwards I had a large seizure (again no warning and hadn't had one prior) but fortunately the ambulance arrived quickly and gave me an oxygen fix - since then I've been on Keppra although it's questionable as it delays brain recovery (anti-cholinergic drug). I have had 2 cerebral angiograms since and have refused to have another one moving forward. The last time something happened in my brain that the neurosurgeons haven't heard of before so given the high risk I don't think my brain will entertain it again whilst I'm awake (plus they damaged the femoral nerve artery so it was mega painkillers and unable to walk for a week). They discovered I need more metal in the second SAH by it hasn't grown since the previous CA and I now have a third unruptured aneurysm but we're just leaving it until next year - I've done a comparative on the last 2 CAs and it hasn't grown significantly so it's safer to leave it be methinks. (Especially as I'm reading 'Do No Harm' by Henry Marsh - an insight into the world of neurosurgeons (humorous in some places and a wake-up call in others). So, that's the harbinger of doom part written. Do I lament my misfortune and wrap myself in cotton wool? Absolutely not. Every day when I wake I smile because I've woken up on the right side of the grass; when I'm tired as I've been working on a screen all day then I put music on and do silly dances; I laugh internally when I express my opinions knowing that I don't really have many brain barriers now so that's my get out of jail card; I can't drive so I see and hear the tapestry of life when travelling on public transport and I appreciate everything around me when I'm on foot. I'm not married and I don't have children (as far as I know) - it's just me, myself and I but the three of us seem to be titanium when it comes to coping with these brain hiccups. So, in the grand scheme of things I think I'm actually quite lucky and long may the luck prosper! Sarah SAH August 2010 - clipped; SAH March 2015 - coiled
    3 points
  4. Where do I start?!!! Thank you all so much for taking the time and consideration to reply to my post.Because I know that you all understand, your replies have enabled me to 'look from the outside in' and that is a huge help. I think my biggest mistake since leaving hospital has been pretending that everything is ok and that I'm ok. Too much pride? Yes I think so. John and I have never been ones to ask for help, always happy to give it but perhaps too proud to ask for it., I think we asked on a couple of occasions in the early days , it wasn't forthcoming so we didn't bother asking again.. I agree that we should meet up with my sisters for a chat, as you've mentioned above if We don't tell them how do they know? The preparations are coming along re wedding This has caused added pressure My organising skills left me 2 years ago,I feel bad that I've not shown much interest or enthusiasm, I've mostly left it to John ( like he doesn't have enough to do! poor bloke) 2 months to go and I haven't bought a dress yet! I asked him if he'd still marry me if I turned up in my jeans and Tee shirt, Bless him, he said Yes(I think he'd prefer to see me in a dress though!!!) My anger and frustrations are my enemies right now, and throw in a touch of the green eyed monster and lots of tiredness, not the best combination! I am on Anti deps~sertraline., I've insisted that the dose be reduced in readiness for coming off them completely, I know they suit some people but they're not for me. As for an appointment with my GP, please excuse the next sentence. . . . I would be better off having a chat with Alfie (my dog) he has more knowledge and understanding of Sah.,sorry if that came across as very rude. Just reading and re reading all of your replies is helping me more than you know.You are all so generous with your time and advice. Thank you again Love Janxx
    3 points
  5. Just read your post,I'm so very sorry you are feeling this way right now. A lot of good advice has been given, so I will just offer you a virtual hug. You are not alone,as you can see! please be kind to yourself,you have been through so much,and there are plenty of better days ahead
    3 points
  6. Hi Jan, I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling as you are. I agree with everything that has been said, John is the easy target because he's there, really the people you want to shout at are your sister's, they are the ones who are not being supportive, Louise had a great idea, getting them together and letting them know and see how this SAH has affected your lives, like Macca said there's no plaster cast for your brain, people can't see the injury so they assume ( wrongly of course ) that you are ok. Sit them down and tell them that you are not and ask them for help, try explaining how you would like them to help you, as Macca said write it all down and hand them copies and try to get them to understand what is going on. I think we all have a bit of jealousy because we have lost some of the person we were, the fact that others around us are just getting on with their lives can be frustrating at times. I know I have said this before, you have a fantastic man at your side, who I know worships the ground you walk on, I know he wouldn't leave you because YOU are his happiness, his world. As Macca said Jan, you can't change the past, you can however shape your future, We are all here for you, Sending you love Love Michelle xx
    2 points
  7. So sorry to hear how you are feeling Jan some excellent advice from others. I do agree perhaps go back to GP or seek some counselling/therapeutic support independently. You are not unlike any of us who have hit brick walls at different times and where families fail to understand, often this comes out in anger and arguments. Remember dealing with loss is a journey where you go through many emotions often swaying between them all, SAH has seen such losses for you particularly having to give up your business and also loss of some physical abilities. Families and friends often don't pick up signals we are struggling or need their support perhaps you could try writing them a letter to help them understand if you cannot face a meeting. Mine were great at the time of event but after leaving hospital found it difficult to understand my recovery was only just beginning. After counselling I also understood I often gave them very mixed messages and wanted something they could not give, to take away my feelings of depression, sadness and anger. unconsciously I was blaming stress of taking on a caring role for mum, giving up a home I loved and pressure at work. None of these probably contributed to my SAH, I think I was also jealous about life just continuing as normal for them - that green demon does play with your mind. Just remember you have so much more to give, achieve and that things will improve slowly. Perhaps see a life coach to help you look at your strengths, and to explore opportunities you have not looked at. From your posts you have great empathy, sense of humour and good people skills all valuable assets. I am not sure if you have any close friends who can also help, of course we also here to support. I know you will survive this blip, you have survived so much worse. Sharon x
    2 points
  8. I am now almost 4 years post non aneurism SAH and still get regular headaches. Weather and hormones affect it huge and I make sure to have T3 on hand at all times. It's not as bad as the first two years but it is still there as a dull ache. Not sure how many others are the same, but that has been my experience.
    1 point
  9. Macca Thank you, you've just had me laughing til I cried(happy cry !)Ive checked the kitchen cupboard, got a good stock of bin bags and an image ofJohn dressed like a village idiot, whoops I think you said yokel., just joking, he's only an idiot for putting up with me poor man . On a slightly more serious note Thank you for advice re medication, I will check side effects etc. Macca, you have a unique talent with your advice and humour,It never fails to lift me, Thank you Love Jan xx
    1 point
  10. Hi Vermont Girl, When I was in hospital for SAH, they found out I was allergic to codeine, so I take paracetamol. Some of us on here get what I call barometer heads, when there is a storm brewing we get thick heads and feel the pressure build up but we are not medical so see Doc and put your mind at ease. My surgeon told me stress is bad for us so I'll pass it on to you xx You take care and think happy thoughts as we are Survivors, wishing you all the best. Good luck and remember happy thoughts only when possible XX Regards Winb143
    1 point
  11. Thank you so much for your kind words. She is now on a ward-she has been there for 3 days now and already looks better. It's so light and airy there and she shares the room with 3 other ladies so a lot more "normal". She has been responding more and staying awake for longer spells. When she was awake I did show her a picture of my dog (who she adores) and she recognised him and mouthed his name-it brought a tear to my eye!! She also said "no" and "yes" to the neuros this morning so they now know that I am not lying to them when I say she responds. She is in such an amazing hospital-I cannot fault the North Staffs hospital...amazing people!! More physio tomorrow and a possible shunt next week! X
    1 point
  12. Jan, darling, even though you have had depression before, it could be here again. It doesn't present itself in the same way every time and the effect it has you can vary too. Please make an appointment to see your GP darling, even if its to have counselling and/or anti-deps. Your mental state will affect your physical state and vice versa. Don't let this go on because you feel you have been beaten by the SAH. Be determined yet patient hun, but please see a professional. Sending you a world of hugs xxx
    1 point
  13. Hi Megan I had an SAH with no cause found in late July. Due to pressure and financial circumstances I tried to return to work after 4 weeks. I saw an Occupational Health doctor who advised building up from 2 days in the first week to full time at the end of week 4. It just wasn't possible for me and I had to cut back drastically and have been managing 2 days a week up until last week when I did 3 days. It took me from Thursday until today to recover, ready to try it again! I have found I need more pain relief and more anti sickness medication with each day I work as my symptoms are much worse when I'm tired. Things that have helped me: - Drink loads of water (I have a jug on my desk) -Try and find somewhere quiet to take time out, I retreat to my car, put ear plugs in and an eye mask on for 10-15 minutes. This seems to help my brain settle down so I can do the next couple of hours. -I have my iPod at work, if I am getting distracted at my desk I plug myself in! - On work days I take my medication regularly whether I feel I need it or not -I eat small snacks through the day because when I'm tired my appetite goes I can't cope with glare on my computer screen or keyboard, so I have shuffled my desk around. I also found being in large meetings, or more than one person talking at once really difficult at first, but am managing this a little better now. I would agree with Iola, take as much time as you can. The trouble is this isn't always easy or possible. Try to be gentle with yourself and rest outside of work as much as you can! Good luck! Julie x
    1 point
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