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boom

Boom - my story and questions so far guys

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hi guys,

my name is boom and I thought id introduce myself and hopefully get acquainted with everyone. I'm hoping to share my experience and I'm hoping that there are people who have had the same experience and that reside in the UK ..

 

Sorry not hoping or wishing a SAH on anyone

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Hi guys , firstly ive named myself appropriately as this is what happened BOOM.


My story is simply a case of having a sudden onset of a sore head originating from the back of my neck and up onto my crown and then towards my eyes, this was followed by severe sweating and vision and cognitive impairment whilst driving home from the scottish highlands to on march 7th 2014.

 


I courageously or stupidly managed to drive 40+ miles and admit myself into hospital, as I had no phone signal and absolutely no way of getting help as the highlands are desolate.

Anyway once admitted to hospital on the Friday night I was being physically sick and couldn't open my eyes or function. The doctors in A&E quickly responded and had me diagnosed within" A SMALL BLEED ON YOUR BRAUN SIR" . After a Ct or MRI , can't remember tbh.

after that I was in all weekend and finally discharged myself on the Monday morning.

I followed up with the hospital as an outpatient and was further diagnosed with an ANEURYSM, then after that was ruled out it was an AVF then an AVM and finally after 12-18 months it was or I was offered no explanation other than a freak accident.

( So in other words they don't have a clue, and by not correcting anything, i've been living in constant fear for years now,just awaiting the big one which allegedly follows the SMALL LEAK in over 40-60% of leaks)

 


BEHAVIOUR

Now 3½ later I realise that I have changed dramatically in the way I behave and decided to look online and came across this site.

Now following the incident I remained out of work for 3 years as I drove and iam a hands on mechanical engineer/fitter required to fix and operate heavy machinery in responsible situations, and only just returned to a minimum wage unskilled job in May 17 ,this year.

 


Now I'm wondering if anyone can help with my overall behavior as I have become very

 


1. Forgetful long and short memory issues.

2 . Confidence and self esteem has left the building

3.. No bearing in or on where my life is going

4. Very anxious and uncomfortable in social situations

5. Feel as though the old me died 4 years ago

6. Have stopped going out as I no longer drink alcohol as a result..

 


anyway guys that's where I'm at in my journey and after my last contrast cerebral angiogram via the artery in my leg, I was given the all clear , as that's the gold standard test.

I have only just started to try and live again by returning to work but I'm finding silly things extremely hard, like making friends and having a laugh. Holding a conversation is hard ad my mind zones out after 3 0 secs of someone speaking.

 


so guys I'm looking to see if anyone else has felt this way and if anyone else has had these lerp impairments. If so what have you done, has it helped and finally had anyone had a second bleed after a small one . If so what age and how long between bleeds?v

 


For me it was age 34 when this occurred and IM now 37', thanks guys .

I will read other stories and join in tomorrow, but need to know to sleep. Take care

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Hi boom welcome to btg xxx

 

I had two bleeds one at about 22 another at 23 when I had the scan and was told there was an old bleed in there aswell turned out there was 2 aneurysms  had the one that ruptured at 23 clipped first then the other xxx

 

Now the other things 

 

1 memory problem with both at beginning now it's mainly short term memory 15yrs later 

 

2 Confidence and self esteem had none which is why I stayed where I wasn't happy but it's back now I take the kids on holiday alone to pubs for meals and out on day trips.

 

3 where/what your doing with your life does come back for me 5 years ago 

 

4 I hated going out wouldn't go anywhere especially alone and I go out with friends and look at 2 

 

5 the old me did die 15yrs ago but I prefer the new me now I didn't to begin with I hated her for years but now i am happy

 

6 I don't drink as when I was blue lighted to hospital they were treating me with hangover from 7th to 11th September with delayed treatment till 13th as hospital needed proper scans so put me off alcohol. I go out though and still have a great time you don't need alcohol to enjoy yourself

 

Anyway hope things get better for you and keep us updated on how you are doing xxx 

 

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Welcome Boom

 

I notice that you've posted elsewhere on the forum with what has happened to you, so I've moved your post here to get more responses.

 

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Good morning and a warm welcome to BTG.

 

You are in good company. There is a wealth of members` experiences over 10 years within the various forums. As you search for cases that you feel are relevant to you I am sure you get much encouragement finding how members have dealt with the challenges of their SAH.

 

We only offer support, we do not give medical advice.

 

As you mention in your post, your life has been totally turned upside down by your bleed. No work for three years must have been so hard given the type of work you were involved in. How did you cope?

Often, the tendency is to try and get back to normality too soon and your body and brain just don`t get the time they need to adjust and recover. This can lead to frustration and disappointment as you discover that it is all these items on your list become very relevant and prevent you getting to where you want to be.

Patience and listening to your brain and body are so important.

 

Do you have family and friends around you?

Your list of issues affecting you are common to most but in varying degrees of seriousness.

 

Thanks for taking the time to share your experience on this site.

 

Wishing you well as you try live your life post SAH.

 

 

Subs

 

 

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Hi Boom,

 

Not nice to have are they small or large  xx mess our lives up.

I was out for quite a while after my Bleed and Hydrocephalus kept me there along with other problems.

 

You will get better but it is a long haul. 

 

I say to my husband did I tell you that and he goes "yes Win twice "  so if you see a man with a black eye that'll be my hubby lol

Short term memory loss is usual, now ask me what happened 23 years ago I am okay but anything short term is a blur.

 

You are recovering and it does get better, I couldn't remember my address so hubby wrote it on the wall and would cover it every morning and say "Where do we live".

 

I sing songs to remember,  it helps, so try it when you feel up to singing but only happy songs  xxxx

 

Keep Well Boom

 

Winb143 xxxx

 

 

 

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Hi boom and welcome to BTg, it's good that you may hopefully get some answers and some shared experiences that might help you make sense of how you've felt these past years since your bleed.

 

i had large bleed back in 2012 and looking back to a year before that I can almost pinpoint when I think i may have had a small bleed , nothing was conclusive in scans at that time but I feel that it was probably the case but personal speculation on my part as i cant ever go back and find out for certain. Karen who set up the sight often lets people know that in the time she has run the site it's a rare occurrence of a rebleed but it's always  important to get regular checks post a bleed until discharge.

 

You asked the following and I'll share my thoughts: 


1. Forgetful long and short memory issues. Yes, I saw a neuropsychologist after my sah and then attended a course to help me learn new ways to improve my memory and it has improved drastically in the last five years but if I'm tired or overwrought I still easily forget. They explained it's not your memory is bad but your ability to process the memory you are making doesn't work as well so you have to create some 'hooks' to what you want to remember, make mental pictures and associations, repeatable things that are said to you, write things down where you can see them. 

 

2 . Confidence and self esteem has left the building. This was a big deal for me as I used to be so independent and hated the dpendance I found myself in and I struggled but you just have to keep making the circle of what you do wider each time and try new things and work out what is comfortable for you now. Easy does it and be kind as you go to yourself. It takes time to build back up.

 

3.. No bearing in or on where my life is going. This is probably associated with the second point. Sit down and think about your strengths, you still will have many and find a way you can play to them. There will be something , ponder it and follow that path. 

 

4. Very anxious and uncomfortable in social situations. Again, the above wont  help but I found sometimes if you can actually manage to go places on your own and just sit and be there on your own after a while it's not as overwhelming to be part of it. Don't cut yourself off but try to find new ways to socialise that you are more At ease with

 

5. Feel as though the old me died 4 years ago. To a certain extent you have had to relearn what you now can do which before that you had 37 years of knowing the old one. So it's early days testing and explorinh new possibilities. Some things you will still keep doing but others are for finding new ways. Be curious and that may open opportunities that help you. 

 

6. Have stopped going out as I no longer drink alcohol as a result..I don't drink either since sAH and rarely go out more from fatigue but there are different ways to connect that you need to now consider and find sonething you enjoy.  Maybe something in your community, maybe helping with a youth programme teaching done of those 'fixing' skills in short bursts...socialising differently. Find your new way.  Helping others is a good tonic too. 

 

 

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