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Tinaw    4

Hello everyone! I am sorry to make my first post on this site one so long and so negative. But today everything just feels so hopeless. I had my SAH 4,5 months ago, and I know I am so lucky to survive it. During my recovery I have suffered bad headaches, strange sensations on my scalp, the feeling of pressure in my head, fear of death when going to sleep, immense fatigue etc. However, I sort of seemed to manage all of this without going completetly insane, probably mainly because of my husband and two children. They always seem to make me forget my troubles, for which I am thankful.

 

I was starting to feel alot better than before a few weeks ago and felt I was in a happier state of mind. Suddenly I was making progress, both mentally and physically. The headaches subsided and I was able to do more without immediately having to nap afterwards. Happy days.

 

Then, out of the blue, my left ear started playing a tune for me, day and night. I have always been sensitive to sound, and I am a very light sleeper. This sound, although in a fairly low volume mostly, is starting to make me feel crazy. It occasionally goes away, and even when it does, I just seem to wait for it to start again. And so it does, at completely random times. I went to sleep last night, everything quiet, and I was so happy.

 

Then, at 3 o’clock I woke up and there it was again, louder than ever. And it keeps following me today. I just can’t relax. I spoke to a stroke nurse yesterday, who said that according to the doctor, the sound was not in itself an indication of something dangerous. Therefore, it was not the hospital’s problem, and I had to go see my GP about it. So, I called and made an appointment for Monday, but something tells me they won’t find anything at all. I am guessing it’s just my head playing tricks on me. Anyway, it feels as if I have gone backwards in my recovery, and that is not a good feeling.

 

I don’t know what I wanted to say with this, really, I just felt I had to write this down to keep my mind from going mad. I am so glad I found this site and I hope you are having a good day today!

Tina

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Tina    8,138

Hi Tina

 

A very warm welcome to BTG from another Tina :) 

 

Sorry you are suffering so badly with Tinnitus, its horrible, feel for you !

You are still in the very early stages of recovery, i had this on and off for the first year in my recovery. It did improve over time, i still get the odd noise but fingers crossed not so loud.

 

One thing i will say, is that sometimes you seem to go backwards to go forwards in recovery, if that makes sense.

Maybe you are overdoing things, pushing too hard. Be kind to yourself and listen to your body.

 

Glad you have found BTG, you will find lots of caring friendly support and also lots of helpful information on the Forum. 

I really hope your GP can help you on Monday.

 

Look forward to hearing more from you.

 

Take care

Tina xx

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Louise    1,350

Hey there

 

Warm welcome, glad you found us.

 

Yes you are very early in your recovery, try not to think negitively that they wont find anything, just being able to talk it through with someone is a plus.

 

Keep hydrated and know there are other who understand what your going through.

 

Take care

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Tinaw    4

Thank you so much for your support, it really helps. It is also hopeful to know things will change and improve over time. And if the tinnitus persists, hopefully I will be able to accept it eventually. I am just so sensitive at the moment, and any changes to my health seem to make me anxious. I guess things that I may never have given a second thought before my SAH now feel slightly overwhelming.

 

Anyway, I'm so glad I decided to google "subarachnoid haemmorhage" in English and found you (I'm Swedish, and there does not seem to be any kind of support group at all for this here, but then again - it's a small country). 

 

 

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Daffodil    4,456

halla Tina!

 

I love Sweden, I used to travel back and forth to Gothenburg for work for a while pre SAH and it's a beautiful country filled with kind people.

 

Tinutus is something I found myself experiencing in quite a heightened way in the first year just like Tina did. I also have a friend who I have made from a SAH support group at my hospital who has had it ever since as her main lasting effect but it is horrible and unsettling and puts you on edge.

 

i used to just sit with it if that makes any sense and observe it, rather than trying to block it out I just noted it wasn't getting worse, the changes in sound and pitch and after a while it has mostly faded into the background. I have a permanent 'buzz' these days, a bit like a badly tuned radio but I rarely hear it but if I do too much then it will always get louder so my own view is that it does relate to how steady you feel.

 

i also had lots of 'creeping' feelings across my head and scalp and whenever that happened I would worry. I think worry is natural after what has happened, A sudden traumatic event such as a SAH will affect you emotionally and once you have done some of the major physical healing then the emotions can start to show. If you can Tina try to talk to someone , talking always helps if not write it down, that's cheap therapy too! 

 

Take care.

 

 

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Tinaw    4

Hallå Daffodil :)!

 

Gothenburg is such a nice town, I used to live there for a while and have loved it since. Now I live on the east coast instead, but I try to go back sometimes to visit.

 

Thank you so much for your useful tips and support. I tried the "sitting with it" and that really helps. I realise that I've tried to sort of run away from it, always keeping busy so I wouldn't notice the sound. This has me really exhausted of course. Rather than taking it easy as the doctor told me to, I have been doing the opposite...Anyway, as you suggested I have now booked an appointment to talk to a therapist about it.  Up until now I have been using my husband as my "therapist", but although he's great at making me feel better, this time it might be better to see a professional to deal with my emotions. 

 

Take care

Tina

 

 

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Louise    1,350

Great to hear your moving on making an appointment, yes agree with you using someone as a 'therapist' is good but the professional knows how to get so much more... 

 

On the Swedish front, I worked for a shipping company and within it was the Swedish consulate I was on reception but we had lots coming in for their new Passports/driving lic/ID cards.

 

Take care

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ClareM    2,960

Good luck with talking to a therapist Tina, I am a big advocate of talk and it's power of healing. Hopefully you will be able to discuss all the things bothering you and maybe see some way to make improvements. 

 

Re the tinnitus as Daf says ' sitting with it' is a great idea. If you have been rushing about to try and take your mind of it that has probably exhaused you and possible made matters worse. One thing you need at your stage in recovery is rest so make sure you take it together with plenty of water. You sound like you are doing really well so  I hope things improve for you, keep us posted.

 

Take care

 

Clare xx

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Winb143    5,691

I get it also TinaW,

 

Also I get bad heads on thundery days  I am sitting hear hearing the whoosh sound and a high pitched noise.

 

I was told it is part and parcel of a head injury so I sing xx My poor Family xx 

No Stress so try happy thoughts or sing xx 

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