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An account of my recent SAH (pre through to my present circumstances) My account probably does not differ too much from many here. I am writing this partly for myself too help me get over what has been the most harrowing period of my life so far. I am also writing this in the hope that there maybe something within this that could help others as I have found that reading others accounts (although very distressing)has in a major way helped me understand more about this condition. It all began on the morning of 19/04/13, I had just had an intimate moment with my wife (politest way to say it) when I felt an almighty pain in the back of my head, I went slightly dizzy. I thought nothing of it at first. The next thing that happened was that I passed out momentarily during which time I wet the bed ( something that never happens). I knew something was wrong then and asked my wife to call the doctor, I then was sick. In the moments that my wife had picked up the phone I tasted blood coming from the back of my throat and spat out quite a bit. This made me realize that something very bad was happening to me so I told my wife to hang up the phone and call 999 (the first time I have ever requested that) this told my wife that something must be wrong if I was asking for an ambulance. The ambulance crew arrived around 10 minutes later and by then I was very dizzy and unbalanced. After discovering that I had had a few pints of lager the night before and that I enjoyed socialising twice a week the ambulance crew decided that what had happened to me was alcohol related and concluded that I was having a hangover coupled with an alcohol induced stomach ulcer or that I simply had a hangover and had caught a sickness bug as well! I explained that I certainly didn't have an alcohol issue and that the symptoms were not of a hangover. They looked at the blood I had spat out as it was still in the bathroom sink and concluded that it was consistent with a bleed in my stomach because of excessive alcohol. I told them the blood had not come from my stomach and that I had only had 5-6 pints the night before but they wouldn't have any of what I was saying but said I had better go to the hospital anyway. Because of this I was labelled low priority at the A&E department and was not allowed to use the toilet because they would have to close it down to clean it! To cut a long story short it was 6 hours of looking at the ceiling (my neck was so painful I could only look upwards) before I saw a qualified doctor who decided to send me for a ct scan, I was adamant that this was no hangover. I cannot remember much about my first 6 days in intensive care after 7 coils were inserted into the aneurysm other than being sick and for the unbelievable pain in my head. Also I kept having hallucinations due to the oxycodone (I think) I was given. I was not told a great deal about what my condition meant or prognosis most of the time it was me saying that x was happening and they would say that it was normal. It was after being discharged from hospital that I realised all my safety nets had gone and the frightening fact of living with/getting used to all the horrible symptoms that occur. It was now down to my wife and I to decide what was normal and what needed medical attention. This was a task in itself considering a whole world of new experiences was about to come my way. Since leaving hospital from the discovery of my SAH and the coiling of the aneurysm I have been admitted to hospital (the stroke unit! It was only then I realised that anSAH was a type of stroke!) because I felt that the pain/sickness was not right added to the fact that my neck was very sore again (I thought I had had another bleed). I had a ct scan, blood tests and a lumber puncture, the result of this caused the doctors to diagnose viral meningitis. I spent a further 4 days in hospital as a result. It is still early days for me and at the moment I have acute headaches virtually every day when I wake up at about 6am right the way through until the early afternoon. I get extremely tired throughout the day. Most evenings I tend to shy away from going to sleep because I know what I am going to wake up with the following day. I can mange to walk 3/4 of a mile or so but get bouts of instability. In my right ear my hearing has deteriorated to about 60% of what it was before and I have constantly got this horrible buzzing/low pitch noise in it that sounds like a car with a loud subwoofer booming, it drives me mad. Short term memory is a big problem for me eg I take my tablets then 5 minutes later I can't remember if I took them or not. My wife bought me a pill box for thus reason - a godsend! Sometimes I feel detached from life and myself. The best way to describe it is that my brain has been totally rewired but the wrong way but it still works! very weird feeling! I am lucky enough to live on the seafront so most days I can relax on the beach for a couple of hours and just watch the world go by. Incidentally time seems to have no meaning for me anymore and hours can just pass me by without me realising - actually not a bad thing at all! I am not sure what the future holds but I can feel myself getting stronger everyday physically - mentally is a different story however I am happy most of the time so I am just going to 'chill' for a bit until I know which of these symptoms are here to stay! I will not be on here for a few weeks as I am going to stay in West Bay, Dorset at my mother in laws park home. Take care all and if my story can help just one person I will be happy, writing it has helped me - I hope I will stop going over it in my head at night now! Best wishes Mick

In May 1991 I underwent through extensive distal aortic descending surgery because doctors found a descending thoracic aortic aneurysm. In 2008 I had a big headache and I went to the hospital. After extensive tests and an arteriograph revealed one aneurysm of the left anterior choroidal and bilateral PCOM infundibulum. Also, I was diagnosed with Fibromuscular Dysplasia. I underwent a surgery with clipping. In 2012, I went to Colombia to visit my mother and I had again a painful headache and a cerebral angiogram showed two aneurysms and had another brain surgery for aneurysm wrapping of the right posterior communicating artery and wrapping of the right anterior choroid artery. Last March 11, 2013 I had another headache and through an Angio Arterial Head and Neck founding the 2.5mm aneurysm half dome shaped which arises from the right internal carotid artery just proximal to a fairly large 3 mm infundibulum associated with the right anterior choroidal artery original. The doctor told me that is better to undergo for periodic surveillance. This situation is affecting me not only physically but emotionally too. I am not working right now and I do not have medical insurance. Finding this site and sharing with others with similar experiences is so great!

My problems first manifested themselves on a hot summer day in 1960. I was 10 years old and enjoying a game of cricket when suddenly I experienced a strange tingling down my left side rather like pins and needles. Initially I thought nothing of it but when it returned numerous times over the next few weeks and more strongly than before I decided to talk to my mum and dad. Before I knew it I was in front of my GP who sent me to a consultant and following numerous tests I was informed I had a mild form of focal epilepsy which was apparently caused by some kind of birthmark on my brain but the condition was never given a medical name. The epilepsy was mainly controlled but in 2009 I suffered a severe bout of labyrinthitis and subsequently had an MRI scan to establish the cause of my continuing dizziness. This showed an abnormality in my brain, a result which didn't surprise me as it was obviously the birthmark referred to above, only this time it had a name. I was informed I had an arteriovenous malformation (AVM), a condition I had never heard of before but it had something to do with the lack of a capillary bed linking the arteries and veins in my brain resulting in a tangled mess. My doctor explained it had probably been with me since birth but now needed treatment;he likened it to a ticking time bomb because the chances of a bleed were high, a diagnosis soon confirmed by a neuro surgeon.Treatment options weren't good-gamma knife, embolisation or removal. Size and location were crucial so following an angiogram I was referred to Sheffield hospital where it was decided that gamma knife was the best way forward. The main advantage of this procedure was its non invasive nature but the main disadvantage was it took at least 2 years before the AVM could be destroyed. However the consultant was encouraging and thought there was an 80% chance of success which was good enough for me and so in July 2010 I spent couple of days in Sheffield where the gamma knife treatment was performed. This wasn't a pleasant experience although it was more uncomfortable than painful even if they did screw a Darth Vader type mask to my head. 2010 was always going to be a big year for me because I was also preparing for retirement after working for 39 years and as a few of us were leaving at the same time a joint leaving party was arranged for 17th September-a date I will always remember because everything changed, not only were my working days over but I was also about to begin a new life as a disabled person. How ironic that on my last working day my 'luck' finally ran out as that dangerous bomb exploded in my brain. At the end of the evening I went to the toilet as I was feeling a bit strange although I don't remember any headache. The next thing I experienced was a vague,trance-like state where the world and people moved in slow motion. I had suffered a sub arachnoid haemorrhage(SAH), and my wife P found me in a pool of vomit on the toilet floor. This dream world was my introduction to the critical care ward in the local city hospital.Here was a stroke (excuse the pun) of luck because this particular hospital was the regional centre for brain injuries. Nevertheless I was close to death for several days, drifting in and out of consciousness. The first bleed was bad enough but then I suffered a second a few days later, both from aneurysms in the AVM. After this second bleed I needed a drain to relieve the pressure, following the onset of hydrocephalus and something called a mass effect and shift.The surgeons decided the best way to try to stop the bleeding was by gluing the aneurysms. In the meantime P had that dreaded discussion with the consultant who told her she should prepare for the worst. I had suffered complications including klebsiella pneumonia and at first I was unable to regain consciousness without serious epileptic seizures. I therefore had to be sedated a number of times until these ceased. The first voice I really remember was a nurse repeatedly asking me if I knew my name,where I was and the name of the prime minister. If I was asked once I was asked a thousand times. To cut a long story short I somehow survived thanks to the incredible skill of the surgeons,the dedication of the nursing staff and the support of P,friends and family.I remember very little about those first days and initially couldn't speak. However when my voice returned and P told me we couldn't go on our proposed trip to Australia to see our children and grandchildren,I apparently replied in typical fashion 'who says?' My delirium continued and because I couldn't feel my arms or legs I assumed I had lost them and I asked P where we were going to store them as our house was only small! I hadn't lost my limbs but neither had I survived unscathed. Sometime in October following my stay in the critical care and high dependency wards I was moved to a local rehabilitation hospital nearer home. Here the long,painful physical and psychological recovery process began. Physically I was in a bad way. I could hardly move because of severe left sided weakness and my brain was confused and slow. My speech was affected,I couldn't lift my left arm or hand and my left leg was swollen and very painful. Strangely it also felt numb. Initially I needed a hoist to move at all but gradually some movement returned and eventually ,following intensive physiotherapy,I learned how to move to the bedside chair. From there I managed a few painfully slow steps holding on to a corridor rail and a quad stick.I also suffered severe constipation which was incredibly debilitating. When I eventually managed to relieve myself I swore I would invent a more comfortable bed pan and name it after the nurse who unblocked me.My generosity knows no bounds! Exhaustion was overwhelming although sleep was always fitful and disturbed. In fact I haven't slept completely through the night since the haemorrhage. Apart from the discomfort in my leg I cannot explain this but perhaps my brain is just traumatised and suspicious of sleep.The bright hospital lights disturbed me and I began to understand what it meant to be 'blinded by the light.' The psychological effects of brain damage are just as difficult to deal with as the physical and of course the two are inextricably linked as you try to come to terms with what has happened.My plans and dreams had been instantly shattered and I was trying to understand what it all meant. Everyone will deal with this differently but for me the most important thing was the support from P and the family. I also soon discovered that looking back and thinking about what might have been was really destructive . Too much of that and depression lurked.Instead it was vital to look forward at what was possible in spite of the severe limitations. How glib that sounds-it's so easy to write and so incredibly difficult to achieve. Nevertheless I will leave it in for now although I may feel completely differently tomorrow! Some light crept into this gloom when in October two of our children flew over from Australia and one of our home based daughter's gave birth to a baby boy. It all helped take my troubled mind off things and focus on others for a change. If the care in the rehab hospital was excellent the food was grim and I often couldn't eat but I was kept going because P regularly brought in home cooked meals. Without her I simply would not have made it.She visited me everyday, often twice, in spite of the awful snow that year and always with a smile and words of encouragement. If you think critical illness is difficult for the patient then spare a thought for the carers and families. In so many ways life is much harder for them. During December I made my first home visit and home had changed following recommendations from the occupational therapist. Grab rails at the front door, new stair lift,new bathroom with no bath but a walk in shower and seat and more grab rails.This was home for a disabled person-me! I was finally discharged on 23 December 2010.P had spent ages preparing our house with welcome home banners, balloons etc-it was such a warm welcome home.Incredibly our other home based daughter gave birth on Christmas Day to a premature baby girl and our lives were in a whirl once more. In February 2011 there were setbacks and 2 further hospital visits. Firstly I was rushed in following chest pains which turned out to be a pulmonary embolism(PE) and a few weeks later I suffered a deep vein thrombosis (DVT) in my left leg which further restricted my mobility. My leg was massive and I was in excruciating pain. I had to learn to walk all over again and the first steps were unbearable. The clots were difficult to treat at first as it was felt too dangerous to use anti coagulant drugs following my haemorrhage. Instead I had a filter fitted in my abdomen to stop any further clots moving to the heart and lungs. I had to let my leg heal itself and it's still healing.In April 2011 my consultant neuro surgeon decided I could take warfarin as long as my INR level was kept low. I hope this will stave off further clots. There is some good news following this litany of disasters because in August 2012, 2 years after the Gamma knife treatment, I had an MRI scan which could find no trace of the AVM and I therefore underwent an angiogram in September which confirmed the AVM and associated aneurysms had indeed been obliterated .The Gamma knife treatment had done its job but was it the cure that almost killed me? after all I hadn't bled for 61 years and within 2 months of the procedure I suffered the SAH-I suppose I will never know. We have had a tough two and a half years but there should no longer be a risk of haemorrhaging and the epilepsy is completely under control once more. I continue to have severe mobility problems and left sided weakness but I have reapplied for my driving licence and the veil is slowly lifting from my brain as it begins to function more normally. I couldn't have written this 6 months ago . Somehow,miraculously I am still alive and although I am not as fit as that cricket loving 10 year old I will continue to rebuild my life with the help of P and the family.

I manage a small cafe in a busy shopping centre which seats about 60 people i just returned Monday 3rd may 2010 after taking a week’s holiday.I went into work at 7am to start getting all the cupcake ready knowing that it was a bank holiday and we would be flat out all day was feeling grand and at 10.45am took my break i had everything set up and ready to go got hold of my cigs and a cup of tea and was chatting to the cook outside. When i came back in i was standing talking to the manager of our other restaurant in the centre as they had a few probs etc etc. When I turned round and felt like i had been hit on the head i started blacking out but didn’t pass out so i sat on the ground after a few mins i got myself up and went to get some fresh air the pain in my head was so sore and i was really dizzy but i just kept pacing because i couldn’t stay still with the pain i took 2 paracetamol about 5 mins after this i started been sick i started trying to get cover (the things that go through your head )so i could go home at about 11.30 as nothing was getting any better .My dad came to pick me up about 11.45am (my husband was golfing and i couldn’t get through to him) and he asked me to ring Doctor on call because i didn’t look well at all and my doctors was closed for the bank holiday. They couldn’t see me until 3.30 so i said that was grand and i went home to bed dad said he would pick me up at 3 again and to try and sleep it off not that i could anyway because the pain was so sore and he kept ringing to see that i was ok lol.The doctor seen me at 3.30 and told me it was a tension headache he gave me voltarol (injection) and anti sickness tablets. He said that if i wasn’t feeling any better i should go to A&E in n hour and i was sent home. My husband came home about 5 and asked hoe i was feeling tod him i was still in pain but i would wait it out a bit longer as i didn’t want to look stupid going to the hospital with a sore head. 8.30pm decided i couldn’t cope with the pain any longer and needed to get some strong painkillers so off we headed to the hospital ( i didn’t even pack a bag thinking they would give me some tablets and send me home) arrived at the hospital at 9 .15pm and after about 15 min they took me through and done bloods etc etc the doctor that seen me wanted a second opinion so they sent to get another doc he wasn’t sure and asked me would i stay overnight for observation he said i didn’t have too. I decided since i was still in so much pain i would stay (my choice) so my husband went and got me a overnight bag A doctor came round to see me in the morning and when i said i was still in pain he ordered CT scans one with the dye and one without which showed nothing .at about 6pm Tuesday they did a lumbar puncture and told me i could go home when the results came back clear. They came back with blood and within an hour i was blue lighted to the royal Victoria hospital about 45miles away. Wednesday 5th I was sent for an angiogram to see if they could see anything which they found 2 aneurysms ( one ruptured )they let me ring home about 12.30 to tell them they were taking me in straight away they didn’t even close the hole in my leg they just wheeled me round About 6.30pm i was wheeled back to the ward and that’s my story i will write about the follow up soon Donna

Hi, I was doing housework on 1st April 2012 in my bedroom when I had this awful pressure-pain in my head. I'm not too prone to headaches, so assumed that it was something like a migraine, and stopped what I was doing, closed the curtains and was laying on my bed within a minute of the pain coming in. I always have my mobile phone in my pocket, so I rang my husband (phone was dead) and then my mother-in-law to try to locate my hubby. This is not normal - I'm not a clingy person - but I wanted to tell him that I felt awful and wanted him to be with me as I was scared. I still thought I had a migraine at this point. My mother-in-law, followed 2 minutes after by my husband arrived, gave me a couple of paracetamol and I persuaded them that I just needed some sleep. I managed an hour, but upon waking (freezing cold feet) I needed the loo and the pain in my head intensified as I moved. I was shivering uncontrollably, teeth chattering, and pale as a ghost. So my husband gave me the ultimatum - get in the car to go to the doctors (at the hospital's walk-in surgery, it was a Sunday) or he was calling an ambulance. So we got in the car and drove the 3 miles to the doctor. I couldn't cope with the noise in there, and immediately asked to go somewhere quiet. I then started feeling sick, grabbed one of those vomit bowls that they have in hospitals, and went off to be sick in the loo. The doctor called me and after quick tests told me to drive to a larger hospital which had a proper service/A&E. We did this, with me vomiting all the way, unable to speak or else I would have vommed some more, and I arrived at Kings Mill Hospital in Mansfield. Again I couldn't cope with the noise, went to the far end of the waiting room and just wanted to lie down. Of course, being British I didn't (!), and my husband (my hero) insisted that I was seen immediately. I was immediately diagnosed by the triage nurse as potentially having something that needed me to be laid down, and was rushed onto a trolley bed. 3 hours later, after CT scans etc, I wasput in an ambulance to the major hospital in our region, Queens Medical Centre, and onto D10 ward, which I cannot praise enough for the care they gave me. I had another CT scan that night, and was definitively diagnosed as having a subarachnoid haemhorrage caused by a cerebral aneurism. My operation was the following afternoon, and in that time I was told to lie flat or else there was an increased risk of a re-bleed. I was totally conscious, cognitive, mobile, strong etc, and just wanted to let work know that I might be off work for a few days. My op went well, and in the following days I seemed pretty well, just having a bad headache and dizziness (oh and back pain from being in bed so much). I left hospital after the coiling procedure 10 days after I was admitted. Since then it seems as though I have gone downhill a little- the tiredness is really hitting me (maybe because I have started to do things), I'm having difficulty doing things with my friends (I don't want to be too far from home in case I feel ill), I can't concentrate, I don't have any get up and go, and I am so indecisive!! I spent 2 hours in Asda and had to rush at the end because my parking ticket was about to expire. It seems like each and every decision is a chore to make. I want to have a drink (alcohol) as this was a social thing that I did with my friends - but often it just makes me feel ill. Talking is so tiring, that sometimes I just don't want to speak to my husband when he gets home from work, particularly if I have had to concentrate on something during the day. As for being in social situations I find that I can only follow one thread of conversation at any one time, and get really angry if people talk over others as it excludes me from the multiple conversations, and reminds me that I am not so well. Saying all this though, my tan is looking good and my garden is looking great with the tiny bit of gardening that I have been doing each day. I know that I'm lucky and am pleased to be here and just hope that the future can be bright. It looks very murky at the moment, very unclear, but hopefully in the next few weeks and months things will improve.

It was 530pm i was preparing dinner and came in the living room to talk to my husband,who was home unusually early from work(how lucky),my 12 yr old daughter was upstairs(thankfully). As i stood there i had a strange sensation like liquid running down the back of my head,i told my husband i felt funny as i stood there i said i really dont feel right,he got out of the chair held my hands and told me to sit down,he looked worried so i knew something wasnt right,turns out my eyes were rolling and my mouth was down one side,he thought i was having a stroke. An ambulance was called and arrived very quickly,by now i was semi conscious and had been sick(which i dont remember).I was taken to A&E after a CT scan was confirmed i had SAH caused by anuerysm bleed. Next day i was moved to Queen hospital Romford had coiling done.They looked after me wonderfully.Came home after 7days. Went back to work reduced hrs in november 2012.Am now driving again. I suffered quite bad depression in those early weeks after coming home still take antidepressents for that and anxiety thats a small price to pay.I worry when i get a headache,which is quite often now but guess thats to be expected.Had an MRI scan 2 weeks ago will be glad to here results of that.

I am glad to have found a site dealing with Brain issues and hopefully I can pick some brains, excuse the pun, not intended. I have recently been diagnosed with 5 Cerebral Aneurysms, 1 in the Basilar region, 1 Orthalmic and 3 Middle Cerebral regions, these were found by accident when I went for a MRI scan for memory issues. No other symptoms at all! I went for an Angiogram last week and the news was somewhat dissapointing, according to the Neuroradiologist he can fix the one in the Basilar Region and he will fix this one by coiling and a stent on my Birthday this week! Happy Birthday! The orthalmic one he considers to be small and they will monitor this one, the other 3 can only be fixed by open surgery, 3 procedures! They are all 6mm and all 3 are in areas like a traffic round-about with 4 incoming roads, smack in the middle, so not so nice. What surprised me is the Neurosurgeon feels he can fix them, but on a one to one with the Neuroradiologist, his advice is to leave them alone, as to try to fix them will result in definate brain damage, so it is all a bit of a conundrum! I will go for the coiling and stent on Wednesday and see how that one pans out and then i guess it will be decision time, there after. Any information or views will be greatly appreciated. Thanks Martin

Greetings, I live in the United States, Southern California to be exact and recently came across this site after surviving a SAH this March. I have been extremely lucky in that I have had no additional neural injury from the bleeding, the coiling (with induced stroke), or my current status of Multiple Sclerosis patient. The only immediate issue I had was blindness incurred from bleeding in both eyes. I have had a vitrectomy on my right eye and I can now see fairly well out of it (small distortion in my center visual field) and I will have the left eye operated on this Wednesday. My SAH started with a strong migraine like headache on a Friday with neck pain. That Saturday I found out my dad had a heart attack and was in the hospital. I decided to drive the 45 minute drive to go see him and my mom on that Sunday. I woke up feeling as if the headache might have gone away. I walked out into the living room where my husband was and my head started to hurt again. I grabbed a big pillow and positioned it on the couch so I could lay my head on it in a sitting position (the position I had started using after the Friday headache). The moment I turned to then sit on the couch something changed and I remember saying to myself "now that's not right." The next thing I remember is seeing my husband holding the phone and firefighters next to me and an intense amount of pain in my head and neck. Then I don't remember much until I was in the hospital the next day, although my family tells me I was able to talk with them and the doctors-I don't remember a thing. The blindness started with big blobs in my eyes that blocked my vision. Then on the 4th or 5th day they were gone and my entire vision was obliterated by huge floaters and an overall cloudiness. I was told I had Terson Syndrome, a rare result of a serious SAH. I was in terrible pain for days after the event and coiling. The hospital put me on some serious drugs (the names I do not remember) that made me hallucinate. They eventually took me off those drugs after a particularly bad episode where I tore out my IV and made a mess of my room. I no longer have headaches but I do have lower back pain and my right leg sciatica is back in force. I understand that pain is from the blood in my spinal cord from the SAH. I am hoping it goes away soon because it limits how long I can sit in a chair. Looking forward to seeing in stereo again after my next eye surgery and glad to have found someplace where there are others who have lived through a SAH. Best, Rosie SAH/Coiling March 4, 2012 Multiple Sclerosis 2007

I had my SAH in September 2011. I had a thunderclap" headache beforehand, then lost my speech and had a very severe headache the next day, which was incorrectly diagnosed as a migraine. Four days later the severe headache returned and I became unconscious. My husband called the ambulance, and I remained unconscious for most of the next 2-3 weeks. When I came around, it took me a long time to piece together what had happened. It turns out that I had 4 surgical procedures, and several CT scans, while I was unconscious. These procedures included a drain to my brain, a coiling, AVM and stroke procedure, a craniectomy and laminectomy, and a tracheotomy. Then the bleeding stopped. After I regained consciousness I was sent to a rehabilitation hospital for a further 6 weeks. It turns out I had had an intercerebellar haemorrhage, secondary to a rupture of posterior right-sided aneurysm. I presented to rehab with double vision, ataxia and dysphagia. In fact, fortunately my mind pretty much remained intact, after series of terrible dreams where I could not remember things! I could still see, and think, and move my legs, but I couldn't really do anything - read, email, phone text messages, writing were beyond me. I later joked that my mind was the only part of me not affected by this illness. After 6-7 weeks of rehab I was sent home with lots of aids - walker, shower stool etc, one eye patched, and my speech kind-of working again but needing lots more work. I could write very untidily. I thought that once I got home, everything would be all right again, but of course this was far from the truth. It was 6 months before I could move independently, 3 months before I stopped vomiting every couple of days. I really wanted to get back into all my former activities, and be a good wife and mother, but this was not to be! It has taken, and still takes, me a very long time to regain former functionality. An electronic reader has been a great help. Now almost 18 months on my vision is much improved. I have some residual double vision, my speech needs improvement, and I still have "balance issues", and fatigue. But I am much better than I was. It is very hard not to be impatient about the pace of recovery, but everything is heading in the right direction. I still don't drive, but I hope to drive again soon. This has of course had a profound effect on my husband and children. I am still coming to terms with what has happened. I am not someone who used to get ill, in fact I worked at being fit and healthy. I guess this has stood me in good stead! We learn so much about preventing illness, but I never saw this coming! I am alive, and greatly thankful for this, and I guess eventually this illness will become part of the fabric of my/our lives, but I desperately long for recovery! This website and others have been very helpful, and I realise that I am not alone, and that the difficulty in sleeping, and the headaches, and the "emotional lability" are all par for the course. Wonderful people who have experienced brain illness have been very encouraging about my recovery. I do appreciate that. I am thankful for what I have, and how far I have come, and I pray that the healing continues.

I've only just found this site and, reading some of the stories, I almost feel a bit of a fraud. I had my SAH on 19 October last. I was getting up and felt a massive 'explosion' inside my head. I didn't pass out but fell to the floor telling my Wife that 'something was happening inside my head'. I staggered to the bathroom like a drunk from a cheap cowboy movie and was violently sick. We were setting off to visit our Daughter, Son-in-Law and Grandchildren that morning and my Wife had the day off work. That was my first bit of luck. I didn't want to make a fuss but my Wife insisted on phoning the GP's surgery. The GP phoned back after about 15 minutes and after asking my Wife and I various questions said that we should call for an ambulance as, from the symptoms described, it may be that I had had some type of stroke. My second bit of luck, a tuned in GP. The ambulance came, took me to the local A&E where I had a CT scan. A SAH was diagnosed and arrangements to transfer me to Leeds General Infirmary which is the regional centre for the treatment of such things were made. Within 3 hours of suffering the SAH I was in the High Dependency Unit of the Neuro Dept. at LGI and arrangements for coiling were being put in place. This was done the next morning. It would have been the same afternoon but Staff were not available being busy dealing with the victim of a RTA. Third bit of luck, a good local A&E and a specialist Dept at LGI less than 10 miles away. After the surgery, I remained on the HDU for a further 7 days before moving to the general ward for 3 days after which I was discharged home. I was deemed to be making a good recovery and went home with residual headaches, tiredness and general lethargy. These issues gradually reduced and, by the end of November the headaches etc. had gone and I had completed the various courses of medication. I had my follow up appointment with the Consultant at LGI on 13 December. By this time I was feeling very much as I had before the SAH and my Consultant confirmed that, from a medical point of view, he had no objection to me re-commencing driving but that, obviously, the final say on that should be from the DVLA. I phoned the DVLA that afternoon and they confirmed that if that was the medical opinion then they too had no objection to me re-commencing driving. I confirmed the conversation to them in writing to cover myself and, whilst the Consultant took rather too long to submit his report to the DVLA (and had to be reminded three times before he did), the paperwork is now being produced. I have to say that everybody I've dealt with at the DVLA Driver Medical Unit have been most helpful. Perhaps that too is another bit of luck. Why do I feel almost a bit of a fraud? Reading some of the stories on here, some people seem to have been much, much more poorly than I was, have taken a lot longer to recover and have been treated so badly particularly in the time leading up to diagnosis that has often taken an extended time. My experience has been entirely different and, less than 4 months after my SAH, I'm back to my normal self (whatever that is!), doing the things I always did, suffering no residuary issues that anyone is aware of and very grateful it turned out that way. I am in no doubt that I was lucky in so many ways but maybe my case proves that, given that none of us signed up for an SAH, you can have a positive experience if you are to suffer one. Gwilym

Today, in 2011 was my mums last day alive, as fully functioning human being. I posted on here looking for answers and a miracle and while a miracle never came, the support and love I got from people helped me so much. I'll never forget it. I am at university now, I've moved away from home, my dad and brother now live on their own, my dad is attempting to date which is going horribly wrong but my brother is really finding his strengths, he's doing very well but the relationship between the two of them is shaky at best, so I worry and I felt incredibly guilty for leaving them. It still feels like a dream to me, like she'll come back some day as if its just been a long holiday but it never happens. I'm so happy, I've met the man I want to marry, found a career I love, living in a wonderful house, in a wonderful city but there is still a guilt there, the guilt at not being able to help my father and a guilt at having the life my mother never did. Hers and my fathers marriage was difficult, my father is very demanding and angry, something I wish I would've known sooner but I didn't. How could i? She didn't have the life she deserved but I hope she is now. It almost makes me feel guilty and selfish for wanting her back, but I just wish she was here to talk to. I always pictured her, helping me choose a wedding dress, playing with my kids and growing old gracefully and respectfully. I just miss her. So much, but I am very grateful for the support I received here and wish the best of luck to those going through it. I'm not going to sugar coat it, there are no easy answers. Death is a very strange thing, something we all handle differently, but it does get better, the good days start to outnumber the bad and as you can see from all the survival and amazing stories of the people on this board, many do pull through, so never give up on that idea either. I love you all and wish you all the best.

Hi my name is Jane. I am a new member to this site. Last November I had a SAH. Was out shopping on a Saturday afternoon when I a had a split second headache, never had anything like that before. I thought I could carry on, but only got round the corner from shops when I passed out on the street, don't know how long I lay there. When I woke up in the ambulance, very disorientated, the ambulance man thought I had had a stroke. I was rushed into the Royal Infirmary Glasgow, the family had to be called for. Was then transferred to the Southern General Hospital. It was touch and go, but I pulled through. I was in hospital for four weeks, had to learn to walk again. Also lost sight in left eye. I was always at doctors with sinus problems but was always given antibiotics for pain but never sent for an x-ray. Maybe if I had, they could have spotted the aneurysm. Have fought my way back to some normality after a year, but I have got my confidence back and am able to go out by myself once more.

Hi my name is Amanda, I had a non explained SAH on the 5th of Nov, I had been feeling a little off and quiet dizzy for a few days and as I suffer low blood pressure put it down to this. After being at work for a few hours I went out to grab myself some lunch from the local super market, whilst checking out at the self service section I felt what seemed to be a shift in visuality, like I had just been spun around somewhat. I thought too myself that didn't feel very nice and continued to check out. I continued to walk down the street and got around 30 mtrs down the road when I heard a popping noise followed by what I could only explain as feeling like I was king hit in the back of head, I thought that perhaps I had put my neck out as the pain in my neck was beyond intense. I broke out in a sweat and felt extremely sick and wanted to lay down in three gutter. It took all my focus to get back to work as the Pain was now blinding, i wanted to vomit and cry, but was so confused about the Pain as I have never had such a headache before and wondered if I was having what others complain of a headache or migraine. I was under extreme stress at the time of the SAH and just put it down to that. My employer asked if I would like them to drive me home, as confused as I was I said I would think about it for a second and see if I could manage my pain levels. I decided to ask them to take me to the hospital as the Pain was so intense I had trouble opening my eyes, I spent the next two Weeks in icu, and a further week in the ward. I got out yesterday, I am very fortunate, as I have no real deficits, a little numb on one foot, and a mind like a siv, I can't remember names, dates, numbers or what I had to haha east the day before. Although sometimes I feel this may work in my favour haha. Although I see this as a gift to open my eyes to the joy of life and the simple things, I have come out with massive anxiety. And an inability to sleep. I took some gabba and 5htp last night and it seemed to help. Just wondering of anyone else has experienced this and what they did to find helpful. Reading other peoples posts helped last Night to know I am not alone.

Hi people I'm 41 yrs old, just want to share a short story of my SAH. I was having a workout at home not really heavy weights or pushing myself to hard, when I suffered a wickedly bad headache. I dropped to my knees & started vomiting. I managed to crawl to my toilet & was vomiting for at least 5 minutes. i managed to get to my bedroom, where i stripped & just got into bed, my girlfriend came round & sat with me whilst i kept being sick, we both thought i had picked up a bug, to cut a long story short, i stayed at home thinking i would get better, 9 days later & 2 stone lighter my girlfriend made me go to the doctors. i explained my symptoms to him & he wanted to get me to a emergency medical unit in Dorchester Dorset, but my girlfriend took me instead, they admitted me & cat scanned me, but didnt find anything so i had a lumbar puncture, which is when they told me i had a brain bleed, that emotionally destroyed me, all i could think about is how to tell my two children, i waited in dorchester emu for 5 days for a bed to be available in southampton general. I was taken in & had a few different scans, i was told i had a SAH & they gave me two options clipping or coiling, i had the coiling, i have recovered really well, i was in both hospitals for a maximum of 10 days, i was back to work in 2 months on a phased return, i don't think i have any ill effects from my SAH, & i've asked family & friends if they have noticed any change in my personality, nobody has noticed any change, or they are just being polite.. This all happened to me on 10th of may 2011, i'm back in work full time & i don't have any check ups till 2014, anyway that's my story, if anyone has any questions feel free to email me, if i can help you with anything i will.

Hi everyone, my name is Sally and this is the story of my twin sister, Lynn who suffered a SAH on May 7th 2012. We share a flat and Lynn had gone to bed as normal on the previous evening, but when she didn't get up the following day, I found her. She had been sick and was unconscious. She was taken to Glasgow's Southern General Hospital, which specialises in Neurosurgery and had the burst aneurysm coiled after a couple of days. Lynn was in intensive care for 3 weeks and during this time had a tracheotomy as she developed a chest infection. initially, she couldn't move her right hand, but this sorted itself after a week. After this Lynn had a couple of weeks in a surgical ward and had the tracheotomy removed. This was a strange time as she could now speak, but her language was a combination of Latin, Spanish and English! This gradually improved with the help of speech therapy and her brain repairing. She was also very confused and firstly thought she was in London, then the Scottish borders, but this started to clear after a few weeks. there were other episodes of confusion too. She gradually became stronger and started sitting in a chair, then walking with a zimmer frame. Around the end of June, she could walk by herself. The funny language was less now and she was moved to the Physically Disabled Rehabilitation Unit at the hospital. She now worked intensively with speech therapists and was in the gym twice a day. Her main problem was now her lack of appetite and was living on nutritional drinks, bananas and some corn flakes. She also received weekend passes now and it was great to have her home. On August 10th 2012, Lynn was released from hospital. There are now different things to deal with. Her appetite is still a problem. She says food tastes weird and it's mainly sweet things that appeal to her. Her Doctor is trying to help with this. She has had a couple of bouts of sickness and feeling nauseous and had a few weeks of feeling really fatigued! Lynn has been told not to consider returning to work until January at the earliest. The appetite thing is her main concern though. Her speech is a lot better and once she is stronger, she will go to the local brain injuries unit for more speech therapy. Any advice with the appetite issues if anyone has experienced this would be gratefully received! Sally.

I had my SAH 14-Jan-2010 at 26 years old. Was playing indoor soccer and was keeper, at that point had been playing that position for 20 years and is the only position I really know how to play, absolutely love playing. Anyway, first half, guy had a breakaway, I came out and challenged him and as I slid in for the ball he took his shot. Took a full strength knee to my temple, and then my head bounced off the ground, which was just astro turf over cement. LOC of 5-10 seconds. Woke up saw everyone standing around me. First words were "Did I save it?" I did. After much ballyhooing I finally went to the hospital, had a CAT scan, and was then thrown into an ambulance and rushed to the Trauma center. Fortunately, they monitored the bleeding, and no surgery or operation was needed. Spend 24 hours in the Trauma unit before being released. Again, I did save the ball though. Made pretty much a full recovery, however, I do have some sensitivity to noises. Certain frequencies or sounds or noises I cannot tolerate at all anymore, and they go straight to my head and I got excruciating headaches. Also just get headaches from time to time which never used to happen. Oh well, it could have been worse. But again, I did save it! During one of the many MRI/CAT scans, they also noticed a meningioma tumor, which is benign. I'm now subjected to MRI's once a year to monitor it. I do have a question... one doctor told me I couldn't play soccer (as keeper) ever again. Which was not what I wanted to hear. At all. Another doctor told me after 5 years from the injury I could start playing again. Anyone know anything about this or can provide feedback? Thanks!

The last few days I have felt like I have a black cloud looming overhead... don't know why cos I'm doing well... Its 9 weeks tomorrow since I had my op to have my large aneurysm clipped, 81/2 weeks since I had my mini stroke and have overcome so much, when I look back as to how I was and how I am now I am amazed and proud of myself, but I do still get the anxiety and because I have tinnitus in my left ear I sometimes cannot cope with too much noise..... frustration is my main issue.... but am getting there... hopefully the cloud will lift with this beautiful weather we are having!!!

I suffered a SAH due to burst berry aneurism on 16 November 2011. I underwent a coil embolisation on the 17th November. The next 3 weeks were a bit of a blur. I had an infection, was placed on antibiotics and ended up spending 3 weeks in a neurology high dependency unit before being discharged on the 11th of December. My recovery has been amazing (so i am told). The vomiting has finally stopped however i still feel nauseous a lot of the time. Fatigue is a problem and my friend vertigo and balance. I couldn't seem to find any support groups in my area and would really love to talk to someone who is also left with vertigo. I feel a little lost and alone. I have an amazing family, partner and friends but still feel alone. I'm still off work: I work for the NHS and am unable to go back at present. I am awaiting an MRI angiogram then I'll know more. I would love to speak to someone. Thanks for listening. Cath

This is my story that I did for the press. I was born in June 1963 and adopted from birth to a Royal Marine and His Wife now very much my late Dad and Mum hence the reason I was brought up in the wonderful City of Portsmouth, however during my childhood I suffered with Epileptic Fits and the cause was never found until April of 1990 when I had an SAH Stroke at just 27 yrs old. I was a main dealership valeter then and was asked to do overtime at the weekend to paint the mechanics workshop floor so Saturday 7th April came and was busy painting away when we run out of paint so got some petty cash off the showroom manager and set off in the van to GA DAYS TRADE CENTRE for paint. Whilst in the store I felt all light-headed, had a thunderclap headache, vomited and passed out none of this from the point of passing out I can remember it is an account of what my wife tells me via the store assistant at the time. I was taken by ambulance to the QA Hospital in Cosham where I had a few tests and monitored until the Monday afternoon and then sent home as nothing was found they put it down to another fit. At home on the Tuesday night I took a turn for the worse and passed out again so another ambulance was called and took me to the QA Hospital again this time they thought I had meningitis so transferred me to the diseases dept at St Mary's Hospital in the City there the next day they gave me a lumber puncture in my spine to check the fluid this was clear of meningitis but traces of blood cells was found so was sent back to QA Hospital for an MRI Scan this scan was very much bingo as an aneurysm of the middle cerebral artery was found which had burst and thus causing all the issues. On the Friday I was again transferred this time to the Wessex Neurological Centre at Southampton University Hospital for an operation to clip the bleed remember this was 1990 so no coiling was available as that procedure of angioplasty did not arrive here in the UK until early 1992 so my only two options were die or a 10 hour operation to open my skull and clip the bleed, however I was told by the Consultant the operation would cause a stroke and would be left with disability down my right-side and being my natural side recovery would be a longer process. The operation took 10hrs plus I was put into induced coma for 8 weeks this was to not only help reduce the swelling but also to limit brain activity to help with initial trauma, after being brought out of the coma I was monitored in ICU for 4 weeks before being put on a regular ward for a further 6 weeks and where I started the physiotherapy program to get me back on my feet. This went quite well although I got confused with steps and staircases in the hospital and would quite often trip due to putting wrong foot forward. It is a very surreal experience having gone from a very fit 27 yr old to going back in development time and having to start over with damaged frontal and temporal lobes due to blood starvation even the simplest tasks like doing up buttons, tying shoe laces or holding a cup level was so hard and I did feel a fool because you so much want to do it but just do not have the ability or motivation to do so. I was transferred back to St Mary's Hospital for a further 6 weeks rehabilitation before being given the all clear to be discharged with an appointment in 6 mths time for a follow up at Southampton University Hospital. at this point I am sure you understand my love of this great National Health Service we once had indeed it served it's purpose very well for the majority of it's patients including me and was the best health service in the world for which it was world renowned. The first 6 mths at home were the worst everything seemed to be an uphill struggle and did make me very cross because I was a different person to the one that used to live here, however I was not one to give in so easily and had my mind set to return to work that my employer so kindly kept vacant for me by taking on temps but I knew I could not return until at least the consultant at Southampton University Hospital had seen me besides I knew my employer would not want me back until I was fit enough to do so he was that nice guy which was unusual in the motor trade he was so nice in fact he paid me full wages all this time I was off work so understandably was keen to return and see all my mates I worked with. I used the time at home to study the driving exam as I would have to take this test again having had my licence revoked this I retook in June 1991 and passed and was very pleased about as I had a certain amount of freedom given back to me I was given the all clear to return to work in August 1991 some 15 mths after the operation I was lucky in that I was young at the time of the bleed so was able to make a faster recovery than someone older it is at the time did not accrue to me that stroke was possible at my age probably because I was living the life of a young adult out with mates and generally doing the things a 27 yr old would be doing. Still sometimes life sucks and you just have to pick up the pieces and start over, however in a way I was glad that it happened to me, some people find that strange to understand but you see I have been given a second chance at life and see things very differently and always strive to help people the best I can you could say my ideal of the big society. I managed to stay in work until September 2007 when redundancy struck many due to the recession, this came a shock more so to me I guess because of my disabilities and going on interview after interview for any job that was going it became a very laborious task being knocked back, I do not blame the employers because I would be the same in there shoes thinking of the businesses and maximum output from all staff, however I do feel that the government has failed me because they should be doing more to educate all businesses on the merits of employing the disabled and equality. During my time in employment I never claimed any disability benefits despite having entitlement this was for two reasons firstly it just did not cross my mind as I was so busy working and by the time I got home was so tired and fatigued I just wanted to rest and sleep ready for the next day. I also took this decision to claim no benefits because I was earning well enough to live and sustain my family and wrongly thought that the Government would look after me if the time should ever come as I had paid into the taxation and NI system for the last 17 years. No Job came my way due to not only the limited number of jobs available, indeed there used to be at least 15 pages of jobs in the news and I am sure Priya can back me on that one, but now there are just 4 maybe 5 pages and how many of those are real jobs is anyone's guess. It was also hard and remains the case today because of my physical and mental disabilities this are varied from skeletal issues like spasticity down my right-side, drop foot, dysfunctional hand pain in my back due to curvature of my spine, pain in my hip, pain in the metacarpals of my hand, limited joint movements, and hyper-extension of fingers and toes all these are caused from the stroke but are mainly due to the left-side of my body doing the extra work in carrying my right-side. I also have mental issues due to the damage done to the frontal and temporal lobes of my brain caused from the bleed and thus blood starvation, yes other parts of my brain have taken over some of those roles but it still does not have the same functionality and the rate at which I do things are much slower. the frontal lobe takes care of reasoning, planning, parts of speech, movement, emotions, and problem solving and the temporal lobe takes care of perception and recognition of auditory stimuli, memory, and speech so these are affected. It is a well known fact in stroke patients that a a third will die a third will make a good recovery and I third will be left with varying disabilities that is me I have varying disabilities. It is a shame that not enough attention is given to long term stroke survivors because they still have issues and there brain function is not monitored I am sure this will lead to bigger problems down the road like dementia. I am now at a turning point and very worried about what the future holds and specially with our present Government who peddle lies to the press about being work shy or there favourite term scroungers this is deeply depressing as it is far from the truth as the majority of the disabled do want to work but they do not want the pressure the government is so keen to push on them. Last Friday I had the dreaded ESA50 form arrive from ATOS healthcare for the WCA this I am bricking it and is constantly on my mind I know I will fail because it takes no account of mental issues and for me the physical descriptors are very poor so if I lose this as well as the cuts to tax credits I will be up the river without a paddle. I cannot even get the disability element of tax credits because although it says you have to be at a disadvantage in getting a job you also have to be in at least part time employment how does that work out because it does not to me. I am right now really scared I took on a mortgage under Thatcher’s RTB Scheme and always paid it never claimed mortgage interest relief, we care for my wife's mum at home who is also disabled and thus saved the Government a fortune in care costs over many years but now I feel I have been dumped and wish that I had now claimed mortgage relief and all the disability benefits I was entitled too from April 1990 instead of leaving it until October 2007. The Fact I had a stroke does not change though I am glad I had it because I see what this Government and many Citizens do not but I do hope things change for the better I also have a an SAH Stroke blog that I started a few weeks ago here that I will be adding loads too over the coming months and years. http://diaryofastrokesurvivor.blogspot.co.uk/

Thank you all for sharing your experiences. I had my SAH on October 11, 2011. I had been experiencing a headache for a couple days that suddenly got really bad while I was dressing for work. I am not one to run to the hospital but I called my sister and asked her to call an ambulance while I unlocked the door. I last remember being loaded into the ambulance in Aiken, South Carolina and waking up almost 3 weeks later in the ICU of a hospital in Augusta, Georgia. I was experiencing a small bleed while at home and thankfully I was in the Aiken ICU when the big bleed happened. My heart stopped several times when the big bleed started and without a doubt I would not have survived without the ICU team. After I was stable enough to transport, I was moved to Georgia where coils were used to stop the bleeding. After 6 weeks in the hospital and another 10 days in rehab, I was able to return home with a walker. I can now walk normally. The headaches have stopped but I do notice that I tire very easily. I also have noticed that while I feel very normal and clear headed at home, I sometimes feel confused and unsteady when I am out in public. I have had 2 surgeries on my right eye to remove the blood and repair the retina (the last surgery required me to lie face down for 17 days!). Unfortunately, my retina is still has scar tissue that must be removed and there is a small hole in the macula. I hate having bad vision! I really miss the old me and I am trying to get to know the new me and what that means. Sometimes that really gets me annoyed and depressed. Thank you all for posting. It is encouraging for me to hear that others have gotten through what I am experiencing now. Mike Aiken, South Carolina

One day late in the summer, after my son came home from Paris where he was studying Music at a conservatory, I was irritated that I had to attend a meeting at church, but I did like the committee so I really couldn't complain much. After having jumped in the car, I caught myself thinking, "Ya know, nothing REALLY terrible has happened to you and if it had, wouldn't it give you a better understanding of things?"...Then I said out loud, "What the heck are you wishing for?" I then made it to the meeting and not 5 minutes had gone by when I had the worst headache of my life! My voice started rising in pitch and I felt compelled to lie down on the floor because I thought I might fall down and bang my head. I wouldn't want that. Luckily, my pastor was right there. He asked me what he could do and I said, "Call 911 first and then my husband." My breathing was getting labored at this point. The paramedics arrived very fast and they asked me which hospital they should take me to and I said, "Which ever is best for Neuro." So they took me to University of Michigan. Once in the emergency room, I was given a complete neuro work-up including a CT scan. It reveled a perimesencephalic SAH. While The staff stepped out to put a treatment plan together, I had another terrible headache and vomited and became unable to speak or move except I could shake my head back and forth. They did another CT scan and my SAH had progressed and become slightly diffuse. I remember my son taking off his glasses and putting his face in his hand. I thought, "I may not make it." but I did. I was very surprised to "awaken" a while later. When My pastor was saying prayers with my family and me, I thought that I wouldn't come back if I went into that prayerful/reflective mode of being. I made the decision to go forth into the unknown and was prepared to die. I was at peace. Total peace. I was then admitted to the Neuro ICU and subsequently moved to the Stoke Unit after 5 days regaining my mobility very slowly. From then I went to inpatient rehab for just over a week. All-in-all, I was in the hospital 3 weeks. When I came home, I felt like 2 people and was dizzy as heck. It took me months to try and describe it..."Like I am in a gyroscope 24/7". I had trouble focusing on the big picture in all aspects of my life, I guess I could only handle the small parts like laying out all my clothes (parts) because what? Oh yah, I'm getting dressed (the big picture). Now I'm in my 6th month post SAH and have less physical, but still weird ethereal bodily feelings and more emotional issues. I cry a lot and keep wondering what's going to be next on the road to recovery. I've found that it isn't something to "Fight for" or I shouldn't, "Beat it", but I need to surrender to it. ~Kris

I had my SAH on August 17th this year. It was coiled the next day at the Walton Centre in Merseyside. I have a smaller aneurysm which is being monitored. A close friend (who actually saved my life by insisting I ring NHS Direct instead of trying to sleep it off) found this site for me and I've been looking in a lot but not saying very much yet. I have a passion for photography and this has kept me focussed (pun) when everything else needs too much concentration and mental effort. Last week I was invited by a local paper (Liverpool Echo) to talk about my photography and recent experiences, and today it was printed (a 3-page spread no less!). As it tells my story I thought I'd post a link to it:http://www.liverpoolecho.co.uk/liver...0252-29743165/

I am British but live in Spain. I collapsed last New Years Eve at the foot of the apartment stairs. Some kind stranger called the ambulance and also alerted my husband who was still up in the apartment. Due to the date, people, including the paramedics, at first assumed I was drunk! I was in fact on my way to meet a friend for a drink but had not had one yet. Next I remember I woke up in hospital and was told I had suffered a ruptured aneurysm, so clearly they were able to diagnose it right away. Then I passed out and was in a coma for 7 weeks. When I came round, blood had leaked into the backs of both eyes and I could not see. The staff explained this to me and said it was a simple operation to clean out the blood. Well, it was fairly simple, the eyes were done under local anaesthetic several weeks apart and my vision is almost OK now. My only complaint here is that I had to wait months in blindness for the ops and I suspect they forgot to refer me, I only got a date when a Spanish speaking friend rang them and they seemed quite embarrassed! Apart from that I have no complaints about my treatment. I had lots of physiotherapy and am now out of my wheelchair and walking OK, still trying to build up my strength. They could not entirely fix my hands which were all cramped up after the coma, my left hand (luckily I am left-handed) is nearly OK but the right hand is weak and I cannot straighten out the fingers properly. In a couple of weeks I have another eye appointment and I am hoping they will say I am fit to fly back to UK and see my kids! Then I have another neurologist appt in January so perhaps I should not try flying back until after that. Hey ho, it is a long road and I am finding the anxiety and depression the biggest problem, so hooray for sites like this!

Oct. 23, 2009 was a Pro-Development day so I had the day off of work as my job as a teacher's assistant. I had been awake for a few hours, puttering and doing some housework when I decided to take a break and watch some TV. As I was sitting down on the couch I turned my head and heard this "pop" at the top of my neck and felt like someone hit me in the head with a baseball bat I immediately had a headache worse than anything I had ever experienced in my life. I had no idea what was going on, it felt almost like I had pulled or tweaked the muscles in my neck, but had done nothing to cause it. I couldn't even tilt my head forward, so tried to do some stretching in my neck for about 20 minutes. It didn't help at all, and the discomfort was excruciating so I did the only thing I could think of to help and made a chiropractic appointment. They could barely understand me because I was crying so hard and told me they were just closing for the day, since they were only open until lunch. Realizing the distress I was in they squeezed me in and I quickly drove to town. Needless to say the adjustment didn't help, and luckily for me my chiropractor was worried about me and phoned to ask if I was feeling any better. When I said no, he asked if I was feeling nauseous and when I said yes he told me that I needed to go to the hospital. At this point the pain was scaring me and I agreed that it was something serious. Looking back I realize that I should have called the ambulance, because if it had been an aneurysm and had blown while driving I would have crashed the car and possibly killed other people. I also would have received better, faster medical care. But no, the 15 minute drive took me about 40 minutes because I had to stop when the pain would become uncontrollable and/or had to throw up. When I finally got to the hospital I explained to Admissions my symptoms, and at this time there was the SARS outbreak, and I guess she just assumed that is what I had. She gave me a mask, told me to sit down and wait. So there I sat, the only person in the waiting area, trying not to throw up or scream from the pain while they put other people through to emergency who had been in a little fender bender. Luckily for me someone who knew me worked in the Emergency ward and saw me sitting there and asked what was going on. She quickly realized how serious my situation was and I was whisked into a room, with a team of nurses. At this point it is about 3 hours since the bleed started and I was past the point of keeping my screams in. 3 or 4 nurses poked me countlessly trying to get a vein to give me a morphine IV drip (not a great time to be dehydrated!) The neurologist had been called in and he gave me a spinal tap, which he found blood in and decided to do a CT scan with contrast dye to locate the area of the brain where the bleed was. I thank the universe that my sister Rhonda was working that day in the hospital, because she was able to come down and distract me and give me moral support and to help explain some things. So when the neurologist looked at the CT scan he realized that I would probably need surgery and next thing you know I was on my way to Kelowna hospital by ambulance with lights and sirens blaring. Not a fun experience when you are nauseous and have a humongous headache! At this point my family I think had been told that I would need brain surgery and might not make it through the night. So they all frantically drove up to Kelowna to see me one at a time to possibly be saying goodbye. As each person came around the corner the expression "deer in the headlights" came to mind. Their eyes were big as saucers and some couldn't hold back the tears. Nothing reminds you more of your own mortality than someone who is looking at you, and their facial expression is screaming out..."OMG...you are going to die!" I was more worried about alleviating their fears than mine, and wanting to reduce the tension I turned on my "Jodster" brand of humour. If I was gonna die I wanted them to remember me that way, cracking jokes and having laughs rather than it being all dark and gloomy memories of everyone crying. The neurosurgeon looked at my CT scans from Penticton and explained to me that they would be doing a procedure called "coiling" where they put a metal coil in the area of the brain where the bleed is occurring. The blood hopefully clots around the coil, and the bleed then stops. Wow, to say I was a little freaked out at this point was an understatement. He wanted to do another CT scan there to see if the bleeding had worsened in the hours that had passed. When the results came back, it was better than winning the lottery. They realized the bleed was in a vein instead of an artery, which most likely saved my life. The blood pressure in an artery could have made the blood vessel explode, which in turn would make the brain swell. So instead of surgery, they said that bed rest might be all that I need. I spent 3 days in ICU with nurses constantly monitoring me, and on the 4th day they put me in a room with 3 other people across from the nurse's station. Noisy and disruptive, and all this time I am still on morphine with debilitating headaches constantly. The 4th day they did a contrast dye angiogram where they put a catheter in the artery in your groin and snake it up to the brain where the bleed has occurred and release a dye there that will show if any bleeding is still occurring. It felt a little like those stories you hear of people getting abducted by aliens and getting worked over in the space ship, very surreal! The good news was the angiogram showed the brain was healing, the bad news was I now had a worse headache than when I had the original brain bleed. Of course when I told the neurosurgeon that he just looked at me like he didn't care. Yes, this man had the bedside manner of a coffee table, lol. My sister put it best when she said "there's a reason why people become surgeons, then they don't have to deal with people cause they are under anaesthetic". During the 9 days in the hospital I was blessed to have a lot of visits from my family and even a few friends. It was 9 days that felt like a month, and if it weren't for the daily visits from my sister Rhonda and boyfriend Jerry I think I would have gone insane from the non-stop thoughts going through my head. Post traumatic stress, coupled with the bleed being in the area of the brain where emotions are controlled made for a lot of anxiety. The blood in the brain fluid is what causes the extreme headache, but another side effect is fatigue. That might not sound like a big deal, but to simply vacuum a room or walk a few blocks for the next month would give me a big headache for the rest of the day and exhaust me. The last thing you wanna do when your mind is racing uncontrollably is to sit around and do nothing. On top of that get out of shape AND start feeling sorry for yourself and the ensuing "why me?" thoughts. After about a month I was starting to feel a little more normal so Jerry and I decided to go on a vacation to just get away from everything. I was scared about the plane trip, wondering if the cabin pressure would cause and problems, but the doctor okayed it. Well, 2 weeks in the beautiful Dominican Republic sure helped. Even decided to get my scuba diving certification. But as I was filling out the waiver, it asked if I had any circulatory problems. Well, already paid, and I just said to Jerry if something happens, oh well...hopefully it ends quickly. I decided in that moment to start living life, not to be afraid...even though I was seriously afraid of deep water. The experience was very liberating and so worthwhile! Came back from holidays, Christmas break was over a week after that and I went back to work at the school. For the first month I would be exhausted at the end of the day with a small headache. They say that it takes a few months for the body to reabsorb the blood that is in the brain fluid. Towards the end of January I had another contrast dye CT scan and it came back clear. The neurologist said that I basically have 0% chance of it ever recurring. So needless to say this news was better than I could have ever expected, and I got on with the rest of my life... So on that note, don't put off until tomorrow what you are dreaming of doing, don't settle because you never know what life will hand you. It can all be taken away in an instant, from you or someone you love. I know of 3 people close to me who did not survive their brain bleeds, I was one of the lucky ones. The picture I have attached is from a 16 km hike I did 2 weeks ago, and this is a beautiful tree that I called "Grandfather". I stopped to give him a hug and to share his strength. May all who read this be blessed with improving health

Hi Everyone My husband suffered a ruptured aneurysm (SAH) on 14 June 2011. He was immediately transferred to our city neuro unit and was in ICU for 4 weeks during which he was sedated, incubated and received coiling (5 of them). He then went on to Neuro HDU, still in the city, where he spent a further 8/9 weeks, here he received an abdominal shunt for the water on the brain and a tracheotomy. He also had several chest infections during this time. Finally 2 weeks ago he was returned to our local hospital for rehab. Its now his 15th week in hospital. He has in the last few days been up on his feet with standing aids, is going to the gym for physio and is receiving occupational therapy. As yet I have no idea how long it will be till he can come home or how well he will recover. The neuro unit predicted a good quality of life after the drain was fitted - he was previously classed as vegetative. We have 3 children at home and I've barely seen them as I spent as much time as I could in the city only spending the weekends with them. It's great to be able to see him every day without a 5 hour car journey or overnight stays. We are now also suffering from the knock on effects of his injury - his wages have stopped and he only earns 81.60 a week SSP, the family was dependent on him. I also predict we will have to look for a home in the new year as our family home has came with his job. I think the hardest part is not knowing whats expected in the future and I have so many questions that no-one can help me with which makes it even more frustrating. Time is the answer I know. I've joined this site as a friend recommended it. I'm 42 years old and live in Scotland.