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kukashika

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Everything posted by kukashika

  1. My SAH was 2001. For the first 5 years after I had 6 monthly angiograms at the General. Then yearly till 2013 I had checkups. I did take part in the national ISAT trials but this has now stopped,finished in 2013 . However if I present at my GPs with a headache I am immediately sent south to Newcastle ( I live in Berwick) This has happened 4 times over the past 15 years and 3 times has been a false alarm. Only once did it mean a hospital stay with a suspected new bleed,another false alarm. The NHS takes amazing care of you.
  2. Hi everyone. I've read all the comments in this thread and the main thrust seems to be that we all feel a sense of guilt.Guilt that we are no longer the person we were and also to some degree depression because we have difficulty dealing with other peoples perception of who we have become. It's 10 years since my SAH and I have accepted that I am not who I used to be. Maybe I'm fortunate because I have lost all my memories prior to my SAH. therefore I have no past. No childhood, no wedding, no sons childhood, nothing. Anything prior to 2001 has gone.BUT it has advantages because without the memories there is no guilt, no regrets, no sadness.I still have side effects from my SAH some nights I have to go to bed at 7 oclock because I am exhausted and feel that I could just lie down on the floor and go to sleep. I have migranesque type visual disturbances - aura without headache on a regular basis and I still have severe headaches.BUT although I no longer teach I do own a B&B and I also have a cleaning business so my life has not ended. My point is this - we have all changed and it is not our fault so we shouldn't feel apologetic or depressed about something that was outside our control. If family or friends are struggling to cope with the changed us then that is their problem. It's not our fault. Don't feel guilty for your SAH. If it has changed you and you are aware of the changes try to accept and embrace the different you, Consider it a challenge. My brain may have suffered a trauma but I still feel the same person I was before the SAH. Please dont allow yourselves to become a victim. Life is too short and everyone on this site should be grateful that they are functioning well enough to even post on here.The majority of the poor souls I encountered in Newcastle General in my 3 weeks there were either severely disabled or dead. Just be thankful you're able to read and understand this post even if you do feel anxious,depressed,headachy or just plain scared.You need to be alive to feel all those emotions!!!! Kel !I also have a load of Christmas cards that I have written and have forgotten to send. Some of my rellies haven't had a card since 2003 It's just an occupational hazard but it certainly saves money!
  3. 10 years on. I had 4 angiograms and yearly check ups for the first 5 years. Then yearly checks for the next 3 years and now a yearly letter to check how I'm progressing. My GP also checks my blood pressure etc on a yearly basis. I'm also part of the ISAT programme so receive yearly letters concerning my progress from them.Ten years on I still feel concerned about symptoms i.e. migranesque auras, headaches; poor memory and no memories prior to my SAH in 2001; no dreaming;general fatigue HOWEVER I do think that the NHS generally has treated me very well.
  4. I seem to be opposite of most of the posts except for Janet. Since 2001 I haven't had a dream Absolutely nothing.... Zilch. Go to bed, close my eyes -- blackness/ nothing--wake up.Never feel really refreshed and neurologist can't tell me if I don't dream or have just lost the ability to remember!
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