subzero

Hello Phil....a warm welcome to BTG.   You have found a site that has a wealth of information and personal experiences shared by members who have survived SAH and their carers.

While we do not provide medical advice, you will receive much support from members who understand.

Firstly, it must have been quite a traumatic time for you and your family on holiday in a distant country and so unsure about why your health was deteriorating. So glad you received prompt attention on returning to the UK.

Six months on following your MRI scan, it is good that you are reflecting on what has happened and what you might expect of your recovery in the days ahead.

You say that you work in a stressful environment and that you have returned to work with some support and less hours.

You will read on this site that the causes of SAH are very uncertain. However, stress following SAH  definitely can cause problems in recovery.

Almost six years ago (May 2011) my wife suffered her SAH. My response is based on her experience and from the comments shared by our members.

Firstly, there is no `one size fits all`  recovery from SAH. Each have their very unique circumstances such as severity of bleed, length of time from bleed to hospitalisation, personal circumstances (work, family life, family support, finances)

Your brain and body needs time to readjust, and time off work initially followed by a planned phased return to work is so important, with your return being subject to change if you find you are struggling.

My wife worked in a very stressful job, and her phased return to full time started in Sept 2011 and she became fulltime by June 2012. She continued to work in this very stressful environment for 13 months, but it became clear that this could not continue, and she took early retirement in August 2013. She returned to work for 2 days a week and still enjoys being at work.

Again, every situation is different, but stress is not good for your SAH, and managed rest breaks are so important.

Memory issues pose different problems for many.  Again, in my wife`s case she is fortunate and her memory has not really been affected.

Phil, your post highlights many issues that everyone here can identify with. I am sure you will receive receive many comments in support.

Your question .    `What is normal?` has been the subject of much discussion on here lately.

Your brain has received major trauma and how well you recover can only be gauged over time. Please be prepared to have patience.

I wish you and your family well as you tackle your recovery together. You are all affected b your SAH.... take time and give yourself every chance to improve.

Subs

Hello Daff, thanks for your post. 

You have packed so much into these five years while also dealing with your recovery...family, work and your valued comments on BTG.

We get a sense of how far you have gone to understand the `workings`  of that incredibly complicated organ as you`ve tried to better your quality of life.  Well done.

Just finished reading your recent blog, and also December`s.........  great reading and very inspirational.

Take care and keep up that attitude in the years ahead.

Subs

Hello and welcome to BTG

Good to know that the site was helpful to you some months ago.

If you type DVLA in the search box on the home page you will find much information on the DVLA and the return of your licence.

To summarise, If your consultant feels you are now ready to drive again, you can write to the DVLA with your consultant`s details. The DVLA will write to your consultant to request your consultant`s recommendation.  In the interim, keep contact with your consultant`s secretary to ensure that the DVLA request has been received and responded to. Keep chasing to get your licence back.

Wishing you continued good progress in your recovery

Subs

Hello

First of all, also a warm welcome to BTG. So glad you have found the site so soon following your SAH.

Try and take time to read some of the Introduce Yourself experiences of others. You will find much help and support from these as you read about how others have coped. This site is over ten yeas old..... there is so much to learn about SAH and recovery from the comments of those who have been there.

You were so fortunate to have been able to continue driving until you found a spot to direct the Ambulance.

Your return to work on the 3rd of February, less than a month after your bleed is very premature. Your brain has suffered a major trauma in the bleed, and the only way it has a chance to heal is by resting.  The stresses of work so soon would certainly contribute of the fatigue and signs of irritability that you mention.

You will see from the comments of other members that at least three months initial recovery time and thereafter a very structured phased return to work would give your body and your brain the best chance of healing. During this time you will be constantly assessing how you feel and adjusting your work and lifestyle accordingly.

Are you able to tell us what support you have by way of friends and family? Those closest to you will also have been greatly affected by what has happened to you and they too are looking for answers. For example, the irritability could cause difficulties with your relationships with others. However, if understood, then it can be dealt with in a way that is positive for all. Many issues resulting from SAH can ease given time and understanding. For some these can be more permanent and changes of work and life habits have to be considered.

So it is so early days for you. Please as Chris says... be patient, keep well hydrated and talk with those closest to you about your feelings. They are there to help you through this. Give your early return to work serious consideration.

I am sure another member will comment about your hair loss.

Please keep in touch. We are here to support you.

Subs

Hello Gareth... also a warm welcome to BTG.  So glad you found the site so early. 

First of all, glad that you are feeling positive about your partner`s recovery. December and January must have been quite a blur for you as you tried to come to terms with what was happening to your partner. The anxious moments you have spent watching and waiting for her to respond to the medics is something you will never forget. 

The comments you have received already are so helpful and it is good to know that you are in touch with people who have `been there`.

I repeat that being patient and not striving to get back to how things were too soon is so important.

In the early months, your partner`s brain is starting to heal and find ways of readjusting to it`s trauma. There will be times that you may find your partner has difficulty with other issues too in addition to her memory.  Fatigue and  mood swings and slight  personality changes are not uncommon. 

When you feel ready, please tell us more detail about your partner`s experience on 10th December by starting your own thread on the Introduce Yourself   forum.  This will help us understand your situation better.

Take care, and make sure that you too get plenty rest and support. Life has changed in some way for all of you.

Subs

Hello Fiona,  thanks for looking back in to BTG and giving us an update.

Glad to hear you are happy with your return to work, although you do rather have your hands full between work, coping with your pregnancy and handling your home life and your little one.

Looking in at your situation we take a deep breath because we know that four months post NASAH you so much need to have plenty rest to give yourself a good chance of recovery.

Well done for sounding so positive.

I do hope you keep well during the next eight weeks. Do you have family and friends to support you as your date draws nearer and also after your baby is born ?

When do you begin your maternity leave ?

Take care and please keep in touch when you can

Subs

Hello Daf

A warm welcome to BTG.  Glad you are finding the site helpful. You will get much support as you read into the various threads from our members` experiences. Don`t hesitate to ask any questions, and while we do not give medical advice, you will receive much support from members who feel they can offer help

It is good that you have had two months sick leave and are now on a phased return. Your return to working conditions is a time when you will begin to learn how your brain and body have been affected by your NASAH. Look out for any signs that may be telling you to slow down or take a break. 

It is so important that you take time to get back to where you `left off`. For everyone, this can be a challenging journey and many have to revise their expectations along the way.

Drink often and rest frequently .

It will also have been a worrying time for your partner and young children.  How have they coped with your hospitalisation and recovery?  Please be open with each other about your concerns about work, home life the immediate future. Help one an other through this.

I wish you and your family well in your journey

Subs

Hello Tim, and also a warm welcome to BTG.

So glad your partner found the site. Reading the various Forums and personal experiences of our members post SAH will give you much encouragement.

You are definitely not `useless`. You have survived a potentially life threatening trauma and your brain is now trying to adjust and deal with the trauma of eight months ago. Well done for your efforts to regain your physical abilities.

Everyone who has experiences SAH is unique in how they are affected and how their immediate family unit adjusts to the dramatic change to their circumstances. All involved know of being faced with so many mixed  emotions as they think of the past and feel so uncertain about the future. I am sure your partner can well relate to this.

So eight months on, concentrate on how much you have achieved. As others have said, feelings of depression are not unusual. Do keep frequently in touch with your doctor to help you through this difficult time. This site will give you great encouragement ...there are many who have shared about how they have grappled with the issues you are experiencing now.

Take care, and I do hope you can get back to `enjoying`  the retirement that you no doubt have worked so hard towards throughout your life.

Subs

Thanks Mindy for your reply

Good to hear that your husband and your two boys are coping fine with what has happened to you, and also your extended family.

Considering a return to work is such an important decision for you to make. It`s early days for you. Don`t return too quickly.

While everyone is different, fatigue is a common factor, and returning to work too soon will make this all too apparent.

Take time to find out how you are recovering and take advantage of your employer`s supportive attitude to have a phased return when you do eventually decide to go back to work.

As you read the posts on this site about returning to work ...........you will find that there are very real challenges depending on the nature of your employment and the stresses involved. It is much better to phase that return slowly rather than find that you become exhausted from too many hours at work. too many hours.

Wishing you well as you face the days, weeks and months ahead.

Subs

Hello Mindy

Also a very warm welcome to BTG.

So glad you found the site so early in your recovery and it`s great that already you feel it has been a help and support to you.

As others have said, that initial diagnosis can be so delayed by GP`s and doctors not realising the immediate seriousness of that `headache`.

How is your husband and family ? The whole episode must have been very traumatic for them too.

Please be prepared to give your brain and body time to recover.  Everyone on this site will tell you the same.... don`t try and make it `business as usual` too soon.

Please keep in touch about your progress and your concerns.

Subs

Hello Clare

Thanks for your frank comments two years on. Well done.

It has been a pleasure seeing your journey develop from these early days when (without looking back at your posts) I can recall that you felt life and work would be getting near normal after six months.

It has been a pleasure reading your posts as you have faced the challenges post SAH and seeing how you have adapted work and  life along the way. 

Your running has remained a big part of your life and I am so glad that you have been able to continue. Often you make me guilty about my modest half hour walk each night when you (and Chris) are pounding the beat!

Well done for your recent travels to Vietnam...a great achievement.

Thanks again for letting us be part of your journey, and best wishes for the next year.

Subs

Hello Cassandra...so glad to hear that your recent procedure has eliminated that constant nausea and dizziness. That must be such a boost for you to have that removed from your daily life.

Hope you continue to know progress in the days ahead.

Subs

Hi Jan

Your thoughts on `Adapted` triggered a few verses for you to put in your `book`.

ADAPTED

There`s no going back

To your previous abode.

No, SAH has led you

On a different road.

There`s no going back

You`ve a new life ahead

Confusing, upsetting

And at times full of dread

There`s no going back

There is no quick fix

But you`re building your new life

With different bricks.

There`s no going back

BTG wants to help you

Their message is clear

Rest-drink whatever else you do.

There`s no going back

We go forward together

Each day in our posts

We give help to each other.

There`s no going back

With these highs and these lows

And our will getting stronger

The end result who knows

But we are going to adapt

Our work may need to change

Take account of our brain

Our schedules rearrange

But we are going to adapt

House work can wait

As I negotiate with my brain

On how much it can take

But we are going to adapt

If I take too much on

Fatigue will soon hit me

And I won`t get it done.

But we are going to adapt

Each day helps I feel.

I must not be impatient

Give my brain time to heal.

When will we arrive there?

We are all different you see

The road that you take

May not be for me.

When will we arrive there?

I`ve come to accept

That each day brings new meaning

Things I didn`t expect

When will we arrive there?

Please..family…wait and see

I`m confused and uncertain

Please be there for me.

When will we arrive there?

There is no way to know

Just hold my hand tightly

Where ever I go

SM, well done and congratulations on 13 years post SAH.

An incredible lady and I agree.. such an inspiration. You fill each day with so much activity.

Here`s to many more trips abroad, and thanks for your commitment to your Mods role within BTG.

Your introduction of the Brain Games has been such a success to many.

Subs

Hello and also a warm welcome to the site.

As everyone has said, you are in good company and you will get much support from people who have experienced SAH themselves or who know and care for someone who has.

Please heed the advice from your `awesome` family when they tell you to slow down and think of yourself as you recover. Advice backed up by those who have posted already. Please give yourself every chance to make progress by accepting that your brain needs rest and TLC. Trying to get back to normal will invariably set you back and give you added frustrations and anxieties.

I hope your disabled husband is coping with what has happened to you, It is always traumatic for those closest to you, and I am sure more so if your husband may not be able to provide the physical support you need for the months ahead.

Take care and keep us updated with your progress.

Hello Robyn, also a very warm welcome to BTG, I do hope you are finding  information available in the many personal threads, that relate in some way to your own situation.

While not able to give any medical advice, you will find much support and encouragement as you get familiar with the site and it`s many members willing to share their experiences with you.

It was so good that you received prompt attention. Immediate intervention

can have untold benefits in preventing increased trauma to your brain.

Also it`s great to learn that you had that months rehab covered by your insurance. You certainly have had the ideal support so far.

As you say, now that you are home and living with recovery, four months on you are able to take stock. I must say I smiled at how you described your former workload

On 12/26/2016 at 15:48, Robyn in Texas said:

My former job included 150 nights/year of travel and leading a team of 200 employees.  Not going back to that life -depleting stress hole ever again!

Well done for realising early that you need time to recover. Your brain`s trauma will take time to heal and adjust. Your body also needs time and the fatigue you are now feeling is one of the main after effects that you will have to accept and manage in your journey.

It is good that you are talking with your boss about a phased recovery with different responsibilities... recognising this early is so important to your recovery. So often your approach can be.. get back into work asap... which leads to so many other issues.

Incidently I am an avid follower of the BBC presenter Andrew Marr and his political show .. Marr on Sunday. Like yourself, he was a workaholic and is now dealing with his own stroke recovery. You might find this link an interesting read. He made a small documentary . My Brain and Me.. but I don`t seem to be able to recover this in my searches.

He is now back at his very demanding prime TV spot on a Sunday morning... still with very little use of his left arm.  (he does his clapping by slapping his knee with his right hand !)

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2351173/Andrew-Marr-tells-time-died--twice.html

Your daily rehab programme does seem daunting. How long does that continue?

Please keep in touch about your progress...both highs and lows.

Best wishes as you go into 2017.

Subs

Hello Robert... in answer to your question about members meeting up. 

On page one in the Green Room, the second thread is `Pics from the past`  where some members have met up in the past.

Some members find that they live relatively close to each other and have arranged to meet.

Personally Keith very kindly agreed to meet with myself and Mrs Subs in York this summer - we were on holiday in Newcastle at the time.

Many members may just want to maintain the on-line connection only.... and perhaps make valued on-line friendships by Personal Messaging.

Subs

Hello Robert

So glad that you managed to spend some time with your family over Christmas. I was so hoping that would be a possibility for you given the difficulties you have faced.

Take care. You have realised that things can be different and with patience and understanding on all sides... you will make progress.

Yours has been an encouraging `story` going into the New Year.

Subs 

Hello Maya

Just to let you know we are thinking about your family at this time, especially your daughter in hospital.

Best wishes for her recovery and return home.

Subs

Hello Robert, well done and so glad you feel positive about the way ahead.

Take care and wishing you and your family all the best over Christmas and into the New Year.

Looking forward to hearing from you again.

Subs

Hello Robert. Also a warm welcome to BTG. So glad you found the site, although as you say, if you had found BTG earlier it may well have helped you understand your recovery better in these early days.

Can I ask... how did you discover the site?

You have had great advice already from the members who have given you first hand comments from their own SAH journeys. This site is a wealth of information which will help you and your family as you read through the various threads. This again would have been so useful to you over the past three years.

So Robert, my input is from a carer`s point of view. My wife had her SAH 5 1/2 years ago.

Firstly, let me say how traumatic it must have been for you as the victim of an assault.

Can you tell us a little about the type of treatment you were given following your brain haemorrhages ?

The majority of people on this site were given very little by way of post hospital support. It looks as if this was indeed the case with you too.

As already explained, your eagerness to get back to your work, and even increase your work load, was exactly the opposite of what was ideal to aid your recovery. Brain haemorrhages require much rest in these early days. Your outward scars might have healed quickly, but your brain needed time to adjust to it`s trauma.

Robert, it is highly probable that your action in throwing yourself back into your job so soon,  has exacerbated your ability to react in tense situations. Post SAH it could well be that the patience you had before, to absorb pressure situations, has been affected by your brain trauma.

Now you tend to respond immediately with your `point of view`, and to some extent you are not really aware that the manner of your response may well offend/ hurt the other party. This other party may be a work colleague, a customer or indeed a member of your family. Sorry to say, your partner/wife/children who have known you so intimately, may now be seeing a personality change which can offend them and cause them to step back from you.

You can imagine, as this goes on with no end in sight, those who care about you become more and more offended and may decide they are not wiling to take any more.

This also may explain the OCD which you mention.

I would also ask... did you talk frankly about your difficulties with friends/family and work colleagues?

It is not uncommon to tend to hide how you really feel in your recovery.

It is well possible that you are not too late to make serious adjustments to your life style (perhaps in the short term) but for as long as it takes to give your brain and body the healing time it needs. I hope it is not too late to save the relationships you have lost. This decision only you can make.

Winnie our established member always says  `no stress`.

It would be helpful to aid your family`s understanding if they could also spend some time looking in to this site.

I wish you well as you re-evaluate what you want to achieve through this tough situation that has taken control of your life.  You can get back in charge.

Please only answer these questions if you feel ok with it.

Subs

Hello Helen. Thanks for posting about your four year milestone post SAH. Well done.

As you say, your life is not quite the same, but you are moving on.

Glad to hear that you have felt your family have been there to support you in your recovery, including your friends on BTG.

Subs

Hello Myra and also a warm welcome to BTG.

You indicate that it is a relief to have found the site. Can I assure you, that you are in good company here. As you read the various Forum threads you will discover real situations from so many members on the post SAH and NASAH recovery road. Their individual stories are unique, but you will also find that there is much in common as they journey on their recovery.

Sami has mentioned that you are very early in recovery, and while it is only natural for you to want to slip back into your challenging and busy work-life, your brain and body will tell you very early, that they have something to say in the recovery process too.

It is so important that you give yourself time in the early months. For many, three to six months is realistic in starting to think about returning to work, and a slow phased return, while perhaps inconvenient, is vital to allow your brain and body to adjust.

Life can and may be very different.

For my wife, she too was consumed in her work pre SAH  five and a half years ago. She began her very controlled phased return five months after discharge, and was back working full time nine months later. She continued to work in her stressful job for fifteen months before making the wise decision to reduce her working week to two days. You will find many on this site who have succeeded in returning to work, have also had to review their hours. Some have changed their jobs completely because they wanted to recognise that life as it was...was no longer the best option.

While on the outside, you may look OK, your traumatised brain needs time to adjust. Please be kind to it and it will help you in your recovery journey.

I wish you and your family best wishes as you face the future.

Take care ....rest well, drink plenty, and as one of our favourite members will tell you many times .... stress and SAH are not a good combination.

Subs

Gill .... so sorry to learn about Nathan`s teacher. Such a lot for these young children to take in, especially him.

Your feelings are only natural .... take care

Subs

Hello Renfield...  and welcome to BTG. 

Here you will have access to so much information built up from real cases which will help you to understand how others have coped with recovering post SAH.  You will find that everyone`s situation is unique in as far as how the trauma of the bleed has damaged the brain.

The after effects will become evident in the days, weeks and months ahead and is often dependant on lifestyle. For example, from what you say, because you are retired, you will not be faced with having to return to work. Being retired, you perhaps do not have financial pressures which others may be concerned about. Living alone, you do not have the responsibilities of dependants. These are all factors which In your recovery will ease the stress of your situation... as Winnie often says...stress and SAH are not a good combination.

As you read into the threads on this site you will soon learn how fatigue is a major issue for most. Again, you are in a position to cope well because being retired... your day is what you make it.

You also mention that outwardly you look perfectly ok to those you meet. (apart from your scar). This also is a common comment on BTG. People can expect you to carry on as normal when in reality, you may either be very fatigued, or your damaged brain may simply not be functioning as once it did. Over time you will find how your brain trauma is affecting you.

Glad you have friends and family nearby.

I wish you well in the weeks ahead and know you have joined a site that will be invaluable as you face the future

Take care

Subs