rampmama

Myra - We all get there in our own time. Be patient with yourself and accept that you are perfect right now. I actually had to step away from BTG for a couple years. I used to think of myself as brain injured. Today I have dropped that label and only try to think about the things I am doing today and how that will make my day a day of progress. Today my goal is to work out and eat well. That's it. Just take each day as it comes and set small goals you can feel successful about. L

Today is my re-birthday. It was 7 years ago that my subarachnoid hemorrhage started bleeding into my brain and I fought to live. I am happy to report that my doctors were very wrong about my outcome. I am working in my original career as an engineer, I am able to do most of the things I liked before my stroke and I am a better human being than I was before my stroke. For all of you in the early days, keep fighting to find the old you, but embrace the new and improved you for the worthy human that you are. One major lesson I learned from my stroke was that I am a worthy human being as is. I don't need to "do" anything to have worth. Once you accept that you may not be able to "do" the things you used to, life gets easier. I accepted it in 2008 and it took eight years to get here, but I think I might have made it back, or at least as far back as I need to come. For everyone here, thank you for the the support and love. I love you all and am in your corner. Linda

Wow I am so proud of you! What a wonderful speech. It made me cry. Today I noticed something I do to help me fit in with all those busy people in stores and such. When I just can't keep up, I hold my head a bit higher like I am observing things or thinking. And smile. It is totally my coping mech but it relates to your snail analogy. And how did you get into this? My goal in life is to be a motivational speaker. I want to share my story. Our stories. Linda

Yes. Post SAH I have been very sensitive to loud noises. And have had a constant ringing in my ears. But the test showed that I am not hearing the high pitched sounds at all. I will keep you posted once I find out more. This shouldn't affect my job but it does make me feel a bit older. Rampmama

Well it turns out I am an old lady at 38! I am a bit slow, the SAH at 34 was not a sign of me being an "old lady" just the universes sense of humour playing out... But work sent me for a baseline audiology test because I work in an industry where there can be load noises. Turns out I failed! Who knew. Anyone else have hearing issues post SAH?

Thank guys! The place I went for rehab was called Community Neuro Rehab in Calgary Ab. www.alliance-cns.com At first I hated it. But now being a graduate, I can look bakc and see how helpful it was. For those who are eager to get back. Take your time. Even after five years, I had a difficult time just staying awake the first few weeks of work. Now 6 months into work, I can stay awake, but get very fatiqued by just thinking. I really had to increase my Concerta perscription a lot. CNS above was very good at helping me phase into work and re train my brain to handle complex tasks. Good luck to you all. Linda

My son has epilepsy. Absense seizures (petit mal) do appear to be what you are discribing. When my son has them, they can last for 15 seconds to a minute. Absense seizures make it look like the person is un reachable, loud noises, contact, etc will not rouse the person. You will also see lip smacking and eye twitches. If seizures last more than 2 minutes, you need to call an ambulance. Epilepsy is a diagnosis given to someone who has had two or more seizures. It can be controlled with medication and yes one very annoying part is no driving and swimming with a life jacket on. Do get checked by the neurologist. But don't despare if it is epilepsy, like I said medication can control it and in some cases people can come off the meds. Good luck. Linda

Wow. What a ride. I just had my 5 year annie-versary and I wanted to share my progress. In the beginning, I came to BTG everyday to try and connect with people that had experienced something that few people live through. As time went on and I thought I was better, I avoided BTG so that I wouldn't have my SAH as my defining identity. And just when I thought I was better, I was accepted into a vocational rehab program. I was sure they wouldn't take me cause I was sooo healed. But it turns out I was very wrong. I only wanted to be better. Wanting didn't make it happen. So I did rehab for one year and set out to find a job after my discharge. I am pleased to report I am employeed as a team leader at a science and engineering company. And I am doing a very good job there. I supervise the greenhouse gas emissions and it is very technical. Not too shabby for the girl who couldn't find her own house just three years ago. I am driving my car to and from work. I am probably more organised than anyone I work with because I have to be. My co-workers marvel at my lists and plans and diaries to record my every thought. They even gave me a raise just last week. I just wanted to share because it does get better with time. ANd I think I am a better person for my SAH. I have been mentoring a young scientist (27) who wasn't sure what to do with her career and I could comfortably advise her to not waste any time more time. Figure it out and go for it! Who knows how much time we have? I view my time now as past my expiration date. No more wasting it. As survivors,we were given the blessing of a living funeral. We got the chance to understand how amazing our friends and family are. We got a chance to figure out what was really important in life. Lots of people don't get that wake up call. They just keep doing their daily activities without much thought. Sure it was harder for us. We had to have helpers, make lists, have surgeries, take meds. But I think the SAH survivor is blessed for it.

My book will be about me and my life. Of course the SAH will be a huge part. And who knows what the future holds. Maybe I will post a bit about my SAH from the book. Not sure how? Any guidance?

Hello all. Great news, I have been discharged from my neuro rehab programon Tuesday. I am now able to sustain activity for 6 hours and have regained control of my emotions. (Not crying at the drop of a hat) I need to keep on my cog program for life to stay sharp, but wow do I ever feel better. It was a great program but I hated it! You know what that's like I am sure. Now I am going to write a book and become a motivational speaker. Thank God I had an SAH otherwise I wouldn't have anything to share about what I've learned so far.

Ok I have to say I love Ritalin. My head feels clear for the first time since my Anni. I went to the doc explaining that I couldn't get motivated to do anything. After a few minutes, he decided it was a focus issue. I am easily distracted now and have a hard time filtering out things like noise, etc. Since my anni, my head has felt like I have been on cold medications the whole time. Fuzzy. Today I popped the Ritalin and I felt clear. Nice first step. I can't wait for the med to take its full effect in about a week. Here is what I found on the topic. http://goliath.ecnext.com/coms2/gi_0199-869092/Ritalin-revisited-does-it-really.html Linda

Well I am almost 3 years post SAH and today was the first time I have got to go to the Brain Injury clinic in our city. Quite and experience. Found out lots from the doc. And I was prescribed Ritalin. Has anyone else had experience with Ritalin? Linda

Thanks Karen, I just got a call from the specialists office and I am having an MRI on the 8th with a meeting right afterward to discuss what he sees. Feeling a bit anxious but I am thinking I will be fine. Linda

So I went to my doc and complained of some new headaches. He is very conderned that my wee 2 mm annie is growing. I too am a bit worried since the headaches I am getting are the same as the ones I got before my annie ruptured. This question might seem silly given the seriousness of a rupture, but they accurately see what is happening without an angiogram? I am terrified of the MRA and would way rather have an MRI. Linda Rampmama

Gosh. I haven't visited in so long because I have been feeling so back to "normal." But this past week, I am hit with the absolute need to sleep by about 1pm. It is almost as bad as when I first got out of hospital. So yes I am napping daily again. I know my brain must need it but I feel like such a sloth. I am beating myself up because there are so many things I could or should be doing rather than having a sleep. Linda

I found a fantstic video that I saved to my desktop at www.thesecret.tv. It is called the Secret to You and it is great. It gives me shivers some days.

I too have spent hours in the hospital over repeat experiences and was poorly treated by staff. Last April I lost vision. I went to emergency and was given CTs, and many tests including a particle counter. It was horendous. Strapped to a machine, told not to move and the probe straped so tight it left a bruise and it took over an hour. My neurosurgeon was ready to admit me but wanted the stroke team to see me. They came and went adn were waiting for the rediologist to read my scan. My hubby and I waited from 3pm until 5:30 am before we were told that my results were ok'd at 4pm but due to shift change noone told us! We were making plans for who would take care of our kids while I recovered from surgery. And we also had a lengthy debate over coiling versus clipping. Turned out to be migraines and the advise I got from the doctor when I asked what I should do if I loose vision again... "Pull your car over."

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So since my SAH, I can't find the motivation to do anything. I am worried that if I visit my family doc, he will just put me on anti-depressant when I am certainly not depressed. I am just lazy. Anyone else find it hard to do anything in the day? And how did you get over it?

I can't believe how close I feel to all of you. Thank you so much for all the ideas, support and caring you have given me. When I first joined this site, I couldn't find any place to interact with people that had experienced the same things. Then I found you. Thank you. I feel so close to many of you because you reached out to me. One day I hope I can travel to England and meet you But if you are ever planning to visit Canada, please let me know. Huge hugs to Andy & Heather - Karen - Aine - Vivien - Rossi Girl I am so grateful that we all survived so we can share with others. Linda

Me too! I also checked for head lice becasue my son got a notice from school. And just today I got a new wierd sensation. I scratched my head and it felt like I was tickling my cheek. Very wierd. It kind of felt like th sensation when you get your mouth frozen at the dentist.

I too had twitches early on. The nurses told my hubby it was because my muscles were once very active and now are not. I still get them more than before the SAH, but it could be worse as far as I am concerned. Linda

Hi guys. I had the best day yesterday. Which of course was a starck contrast to this time last year. I was in the recovery room at this point I think. But yesterday I reclaimed the date for myself. I visited the nurses at the hospital. They were great and showed me around to my old bed and such. It was so emotional. I then went and got my tattoo! One more thing off my to do list for life. I will post a picture once it heals. And then I went to dinner with my hubby where I drank three glasses of wine. Then we went home and rolled around the sheets. (This was important since that was how I had my annie.) And today I woke up, knowing that I am perfectly healed and I will never have another SAH. Joyfully, Linda

I can't believe it has been a year. I mean it sure has felt like a year. So many emotions and things that I learned over the past year. Thank you all for being my family and someone to talk. When no one else understood what I was thinking, you guys all helped out so much. I am glad this year is over. It was a tough one. Linda

Thank you Karen. I too have a "remnant" of my annie. It is only 2 mm, but considering how my 6mm rupture almost killed me, I do get a little nervous. But my nuerosurgeon says that I will be fine. That having 2 mm is just like having an opening from getting coils. Those of us that have been coiled will always have the opening where the coils went in. ANd for some of us, the just couldn't get that last little coil in. Mine kept backing out so they din't jam it as full as they wanted.