Swishy

Welcome..As Super Mario said 3 months is really early into your recovery.  I know it is hard to be patient but brains heal slowly.  I too had problems with crowded places...I think for me it also involved and still does the fear of being bumped into as my balance is not what it was.  I work around it best I can and find I am able to do pretty much everything I did before.  

I had anxiety after and found seeing a counselor helped me but time has also helped.  Go slow and steady, be gentle with yourself.

xx

Jean

Hello again...

The process is a journey, one step at a time.  Sending a heart felt hug as you continue... You say your friend was strong, your words make me think your pretty strong yourself...here you are reaching out to all of us to steady yourself ....  xx

Jean

So sorry for your loss.  All of us here are fortunate, it is ok to feel lucky to have your life.  Go easy on yourself, I bet your friend would want you to.  Thoughts are with you.

xx

Jean

A lovely message indeed.  It says it all.  Congrats on your first year Mrsherring.  One year is such a milestone. Many positive thoughts to you tonight, I too don't know what  caused my bleed but 6 years have gone past.  Great words in that message...

xx

Jean

Hi Tina,

Congratulations on 16 years   Wishing you many many more anniversaries. Love how you always have warm words for those who need them, including me.  Thank you and hope your day was wonderful.

xx

Jean

Quite a milestone, congrats xx

Jean

The doctors told me that they couldn't find a cause for me ...they didn't see a sac that would have indicated an aneurysm but it was still possible it could have been.  As for concussions never had one that I was aware of but rode horses growing up and took many a tough tumble.  I have issues with my neck that the doctor suspects happened as a child, so who knows.  

Jean

Congratulations Jess on 21 years...

Take care

xx

Jean

Hi Janey,

I am sorry you are having such a hard time.  Hoping your GP will shed some light for you.  My thoughts are with you .

xx

Jean

Karin, congrats on your wedding.  So happy for you both

Hi Gary, Congrats on your first Anniversary.  As Tina said it is a huge milestone.  I wish you well as you head into year 2 and I wish you many more

xx

Jean

Hi Tina, 

Hubby and I actually booked another trip to Mexico for October...every year I am fearful it will be my last but thank goodness feeling confident and well and it is booked

Thank you for all your suppport, I appreciate it.

xx

Jean

Today 6 years ago I was feeling pretty good as I was sent home from the hospital with my SAH in very good shape only to be slammed to the floor one day later with severe vasospasm.  Thank goodness that is all 6 years in the rear view mirror.  I actually forgot this year (thinking that may be a good thing)...

I still have balance issues and feel like I am walking on a boat, which is bothersome ( I can't lie I do not like it)  but all in all I am good.  I am thankful and I have lived a lot of life in these 6 years I have been blessed to have.  I have seen a son get married and the birth of 2 more grand children that I play with everyday.  

This site and those here who so generously give of themselves supporting and encouraging us all is a gift, I am forever thankful for finding it.

thank you all,

xx

Jean

Like Super Mario I found volunteering to be a good up lifting thing.  I sat on it for a while thinking what is something that I have always had a liking for but have put it aside for things like being busy with work family and such...

Animals was my answer, I have always loved and been interested in animals.  Became a zoo volunteer...  I have moved now a bit of a distance from the zoo so I am looking for something new.  Again the animals interest me so I have been watching birds all winter and just watched a owl mama and her babies grow. 

Just ordered a humming bird feeder will put it out first of May.  I have some books and there is an app on the phone if I take there picture it tells me what it is.  

Sorry I don't mean to go on and on...hope it helps..

Jean

Congratulations on 5 years...I am in my 5th year as well and if feels like a milestone to me.  Wonderful you are traveling.  Enjoy every hour, day and year, wishing you good health.

xx

Jean

Hi Jo,

Please do not feel like a fraud.  Everyone's event and recovery is different.  We come here because of what  we share and how we can support each other.  

I am so happy reading that you are doing well and yes doesn't keeping hydrated help.  I was always terrible at it and can get in a rut even now but I am better drinking water.

 Take care and so very happy you found BTG.

xx

Jean

Hi Nic...oh my goodness you have been through such an ordeal.  So crazy that you can be fine and then all of a sudden you have a NASAH...I had the same and they did not find a cause.  It left me as you explain but I did not have young children at that time. 

Good advice above to have hubby  read through some of the site.  it is difficult to take it all in and of course you and he wants you to recover as soon as possible.  The brain takes time to heal, it is slow.  

I can't comment on driving as I live in the USA and it is different here.  

So happy you found this site and that you are already able to reach out to us.  We are all survivors and care givers trying to support others.  I think you will find kindness and hugs here.  We are here for you.

xx

Jean

Hi Suzie

Oh my goodness you have been through a lot and so has your husband.  I also had to have my mom go to a nursing home for complex medical issues but also for her becoming very argumentative and too much for me to make things the way I would have liked.  I know it is so hard but you are doing the best for him and you. 

Please take care of yourself and try not to feel badly if you can't see him as often as your heart would like.  You are doing  the best for him.

Sending you a big hug, please come here as often as you like, this site has helped us all in one way or another.

xx

Jean

Hello,

I am happy to have you with us here on BTG, I do understand your reluctance to join us.   I too had a non aneurysm SAH 5 years ago.  The doctors taking care of me searched to find the cause and I was left with the fact they did not know why I had it.  It was difficult to not know why it happened, it made me feel like "how can I prevent it from happening again"...I too had vasospasm...they had discharged me and it was a difficult experience for me to recover from and I still have some issues from the event.  

I am impressed and happy for you that you so quickly had the help of a psychologist , it took me a long time to search out a therapist and when I did I found it to be very helpful.  It took me a very long time to wrap my head around what had happened to me, too long I think.  I am sure starting with a therapist sooner would have been more helpful.  

It is a process, not just the healing, but learning to trust my body again without fear.

I think as I read through posts here from some wonderful people I realized that this terrible thing can and does just happen, often without warning to anyone.  We are fortunate survivors of a life changing event.  

Your progress sounds quite good.  Be patient with yourself it is a huge undertaking to recover from this.  My thoughts and best wishes as you continue your recovery.

xx

Jean

Hi Martin,

I love your "allow myself time to heal"...such wise words.  I had little patience with the process which made it harder.  

Please keep us posted on how you are doing.  We all get strength from each other.  Keep the music going, music makes everything brighter

xx

Jean

Happy Anni=versary SM...I enjoy reading your posts   My heartfelt sympathy on the loss of your husband.

I love that you want to get traveling, I love to travel to warm places as well...nothing like sun and warmth.

xx

Jean

Hi DeniseV...Welcome to BTG..I think it is nearly impossible for others to understand  what a recovering brain feels like...While we all recover differently those of us here know the struggle in one fashion or another which is why reading what others have written is so helpful to us.  

I am 5 years out and went back to work, probably too early.  I worried if I was performing up to my old self, it was stressful.  I worked three 8 hour shifts but they were overnights which I think made it all worse.  That being said, go slowly, listen to your brain...I think our brain tells us when we over do it and need to sleep or rest or just slow the pace. 

I am sorry you have some doctors question you in a way that makes you feel badly.  You are not a drama queen, just a lady trying to heal and live life  

My thoughts are with you.

xx

Jean

Hi Karin,

What you are experiencing is so familiar to me, I could lay in bed at night and almost feel like I was back in the ICU...it is so scary and so close, I am sorry. you are going through this. 

Looking back I think once I started to move away from the acute episode I began to think I had post traumatic stress , I foolishly waited 2 years but finally....I  also went for counseling and like Sami stated a complete stranger with no emotional attachment was such relief...I needed to tell my story and just have someone listen, quietly and hear me...It didn't take me many visits and I felt like I had come a long way. 

Thoughts are with you, we are all with you.

xx

Jean

Hi Karin,

So very glad you found us...I know finding this site was so helpful for me.  You are so wise in knowing everyone's recovery is different, so true.  The desire to get back to my life overwhelmed me early on, I just wanted my life back.  It seemed too hard to have to wait for it, but once I began taking one day at a time (this was not easy for me) it was a bit easier and I actually became good at it over time.

The pain is so terrible, I am so sorry reading about what you went through. I am glad it seems to be lessening. I hope each day is a bit better for you and take advantage of the positive thoughts of your up coming wedding to bring joy to your heart.

Thoughts are with you

xx

Jean 

Hello JuneZ,

I had my bleed 5 years ago this past May.  The first year did not deliver to me what I had hoped for.  I still very much did not feel at all like myself.  Everything was a chore, cooking, cleaning laundry, all of it.  I did return to work but thankfully it was a 3 eight hour shifts per week and a position I had held for over 20 years, it did not tax me very much at all.  My family was grown as I was 64 when I had my bleed so did not have that responsibility at that time.

What I will say is that I see progress when I look back better.  I knew that at the end of one year I was better than I was when I came home from rehab.  Again when year 2 rolled around I could look back and see....yes I am making progress.  There has been the challenge of learning to accept and love the new/changed me. 

I run out of energy quickly and want to check out of what is happening.  My balance is not the best and I work hard to use caution as to not fall or bump into things.  When I push too hard, as you mentioned, it takes a toll.

I did stop working after 3 years but did pick up a volunteer job, just once a week at a zoo.  It is fun as I love animals and children and plenty of both there.  I can sit when I want and chat about the animals.  Yes I am exhausted afterwards.

A brain injury, as I found out, is slow to recover.  My road to recovery has had its bumps but I have seen a grand child born, a son marry, taken some vacations and little things like sitting in the yard and fixing some plants.  

I will tell you I also did some mental health counseling, it was helpful to me.  I learned how to reset myself (doesn't work everytime) when I am able to it is like washing my face with cool water   

My thoughts are with you on your first year and also my best wishes for many many more.  This is tough, but life is beautiful and we are survivors.

Be well

xx

Jean