jillbb

Hi all many thanks for your help. Have now cut down to only 5 pet. Sheep, have had to adjust my life style as we all have to. Feel really sorry for you younger SAH 'S how you cope with young children must be very challenging, just after 3 weeks of hyper active 4yr old and 6 year old has really taken its toll on my brain, by the end of each day my vision is really blurred. I do wonder what happens to our brains when we get stressed and and tired, one imagines that after 4 yrs the bleed would have healed along time ago, we all coped easily before our SAH

Hi all, l am one of the members who comes and goes! Great to see many old friends are still here after a period away. As with us all we have to suffer as they say in silence, only when my brain feels it is going to burst and l can't go on do, l return to BTG, the one place where one does not feel nearly ashamed and guilty at not being able to cope, or one has to say no, l can't do it. I am now 4 yrs on, it is getting better if l do not do too much, but when l get stressed, and family and friends find it hard to understand that l am not as l was, especially when they need a lot of physical help it is difficult. It is very reassuring having read the previous posts above from everyone, how we all have the same problems with our brains. Nobody unless they have had a SAH knows how it feels, living with constant headaches are a bore, and constantly forgetting and confused is frustrating. I have a great fear of going to the GP it took me a year to get my license back, and then l had do a driving and a number of written tests ,at my age 73 they would never give me my licence again. I have also had to have special eye tests as there was damage to my eye. So there we are, l live in the Brecon Beacons, no bus. I can still drive my pony but the shops are a long way to go! Has any one else had any problems with DVLA and has their Dr ever mentioned driving when they have been about headaches and vision. Sorry to only appear when l am at the end of my tether, but school holidays etc!! Love to all Jillx

Thank you every one, my chest seems much better, I have booked to take my Mother away for 2 days to the west Wales and will be staying in a hotel. My son is coming to help am hoping that having nothing to do will help. I was probably over doing it, as you all say, if we try to push our luck we get pulled up with a real jolt. Have just come down stairs and feel ok, just hoping when I go out side the vertigo does not start again. It did unfortunately yesterday. Thank you for your support, very difficult to say any thing at home, but hubby knew as he helped with the house work. Love Jill

I would like some advice from anyone else who has suffered vertigo. I had my SAH 2 1/2 years ago. I have made a good recovery I think! I get tired my brain is terrible at times but other wise I a, very lucky. Still terrible on the iPad! Keep forgetting how to find my way about. Last Thursday I had just done a birthday supper for my Granchildren. The room was quite hot, but I collapsed on to the floor, hardly any warning. Poor husband and daughter had to drag me into the hall, for fresh air. When I came round I felt very tight across my chest, but that has gone. On Friday I felt very dizzy, but was still able to keep going, fed the sheep and ponies in a bit of a blurr. Saturday went to a carriage driving competition, but could only drive round the school before having to get off, leaving my grandaugter to take over my pony! I was so dizzy I could only sit and watch. Sunday I did very little and felt much better, but today I am dizzy again because I have been trying to work. Terrified of the dr as I lost my driving license for year and then had to a 3 hour test before they would let me have my license back. I am not stupid and would never drive if I was dizzy. Any advice. Very frustrated OAP Jill

Hi Sara hope you are feeling better. I think we are all in the same position, I am nearly 2 years in, we have just had Christmas which I dread. My family forget I am over 70 and that I get tired or shall I say exhausted. I am just beginning to pick my self up having had family for 2 weeks. We can never be exactly the same, it is just trying to pace one self. On the bright side I had not used an iPad until my SAH my first messages to Behind the Grey were terrible as I just did not know what I was doing! I would never have bothered to learn to use a computer if I had not had an SAH. I was a keen horse rider, I was advised not too ride as my balance is not good. I now drive a pony and compete in unaffiliated driving trials. Can not compete in affiliated as we are not allowed to have any tests called. Brain problems are not classed as a disability! I think your sking is great, some times we have to change sports for some thing we can do, but keep going as time goes on we do get better, or perhaps we learn how to cope. Ours is a hidden problem. People, ,even families forget and get impatient with our tiredness and the never ending head aches. When I wake up with out a head ache I rush round doing all the jobs I had not felt like doing, then I get a head ache again. As Win always says keep laughing how right she is even if you feel like crying . Happy New year love Jill

Dear dawn I read your post with sadness, what are we doing to our work force? SAH, people will never understand the long term results, they seem to think that after a reasonable time we should all be fit to work. The medical profession don't seem to want to know, and certainly appear to me to totally underestimate the long term affects. Luckily I am retired although I still work on my small holding, there is no way I could hold down a job, with constant pain in my brain and continued blurred vision, will be watching your progress it seems very hard to judge your ability to work when you have had a brain injury love jill

Has anyone found there eye sight was deteriorating? I am very depressed as the dvla sent me for a third eye test in 11months! I do at present still have my licence, but have been trying to renew it since my 70th birthday last September. I had a test last week and they say my sight is deterioating in my right eye. I suffer from continuous pins and needles in my brain, the only way to describe it, it seems to be getting worse. I am terrified of asking for help, because of my licence, but it now wakes me up at night, and I don't think they are very interested in any one of my age. I only had an SAH burst blood vessel no aneurism, so I am surprised my symptoms seem to persist. I lead an active life and have even been placed in some of my pony driving competitions so I am not suffering with depression, just total frustration at having constant pain in my head and a wonky eye. I have every sympathy with every one who has these very difficult to describe symptoms with their head, if it wasn't for this web site I would be going nuts. Love Jill

Hi Allison so sorry to hear of your tragic loss, and your SAH? I also had a bleed for no reason, except I was chasing sheep! Just because you only had a bleed, please don't expect too much from yourself. I am now 18mths on, I expected to be back to normal ages ago but it just is not like that! Try to get as much help and support as you can, while it is still in your family and friends memory, I find when it is 18mths on, There is not so much sympathy especially when one states that you can'nt do things as one is so tired. Do drink lots of water and keep off the drink, I find a one glass of a little white wine filled up with tonic is ok, but red wine a big No no. Good luck, be kind to your self, it does get better, it would help if it would just stop raining. Love jill

Hi Hwyaden, Panic attacks anxiety seem to be an ongoing problem, I just stand in the kitchen on some days and just say,"I can't do any more, when I get too many demands from family. They all think after this length of time we should be back to normal, I just don't seem to be able to work as I used to. I love my Grandchildren but I know I will get touchy as my daughter and 2 toddlers are coming to stay for 10 days! Noise and the constant tv all day really winds me up. At least I have got a lot of bulbs to plant so that will be some thing to do with them. Beautiful day, lying in bed looking at the Holy Mountain other side of the valley, I don't say that in the winter when we are stuck in. Love Jill

Hi Juliette I, am so glad that all went so well with your MRI, I presume you were in the Heath Hospital, the same as me. I have never met any one who has had an SAH, I am not sure how one gives information about telephone numbers etc, but I only live outside Abergavenny, and would love to meet up with you. I have not found any sort of actual group in our area, I only found this site as my step daughter is quite a wiz on a computer, and has at last persuaded and conjoled me into the 20th century. I have been lucky at not having to have an operation, but as I improve ie less fatigue, I disappointingly seem to go backwards with my memory. Do we demand of ourselves too much? Are our expectations of returning to our normal selves prior SAH just unrealistic, I have passed the stage of being grateful to be alive, I just am striving to get back to as I was. Yesterday I went for an all day art course, with a visiting tutor, my confidence fell, as I looked at my blank piece of paper, her instructions were clear, and bless her she made no comment, when I said I could not remember a simple technique, this happens now all the time! Love Jill

Look normal, friends and family just can't understand why we aren't'. I now do tell people I have had an SAH, if I don't appear to have grasped what they are saying, otherwise they think you are starting dementure! What is the hardest thing, is that I keep forgetting instructions I have been given and people are not very understanding when they have to repeat themselves. I used to ride a horse regularly before my SAH, my balance is poor so I have taken up driving, I used to drive when I was young. There is a special way of holding the reins,, I know in my head how to do it, but the message to my hands just suddenly won't go! Difficult to explain. My mind knows but my head will not send the instructions. I have a friend in wheel chair, heaven forbid. I was in the same position, but as she always says, people can see her disability they can't see mine, so tolerance of our problem especially after a year, is understandably a lot less. Keep going Susan, it isn't easy, but make up your mind you are going to beat it. I have set myself lots of silly little challenges, it does help. Love Jill. P.S. One challenge to use a computer, I never used one before my SAH through choice.

Hi jo, I am now 18 months post SAH, I am trying to get back to my normal way of life. I always rode my horse until my SAH, have had to give up due to balance issues. I have now started driving a small dart moor pony which I love. Yesterday I went to a competition with a friend, I was fine in morning, by the afternoon, I started to feel very wobbly, I slept in the car coming home, helped her unload, then came home, and had to go to bed for an hour. Felt sick, dizzy and wobbly and tried not to admit it as other half would say I had over done it again. Dear Jo you are a new girl to SAH. Always go to get medical advice, if you are worried, I have never had much luck with my GP as he always says I was not the sort to have an SAH, reading this site, I would think I was, we all seem to have been very active people, and we all try to get back our previous lives. Unfortunately, every time we over do it, our brain takes control, and says very firmly NO, rest if you won't, I will make you! Nothing we can do, if you can't beat it join it.!, Love jill

Hi Julie , I have also been on HRT for over25 yrs, after a hysterectomy. I have been on estraderm 25 for years having had great difficulty finding the right pill. I did try to stop a few years ago, but I became so tired, that my GPS gave me a blood test and found I had no estrogene and said I should stay on HRT. I had never thought there could be a problem with HRT. if I forget to change my patch , I know with in 2days by the sudden onset of extreme tiredness. I have never discussed HRT with my GP, but I have had no side effects. Love jill

Hi Iola, So sorry to hear about your boss and work. I have had to come to accept, that as time goes on, after an Sahfriends and family find it hard to comprehend that we are not as we used to be! Although I don't work now, I lead a very active life on a small holding. my memory is terrible, having been able to work all day, I am still exhausted if I have done much physical work. I am 17 Months on, so don't punish yourself. I now say I can't, I.did try and refer family to the btg web site, but they did't seem to want to know! They do not want to accept we are different we look the same, we should be the sameas we always were, unfortunately we can not always live up to there expectations. I think you are doing wonderfully, looking after your little girl, coping with a job, and an SAH, Try not to get too low, you are doing so well, Please don't let a thought less employer affect your confidence. Love jillxx

] Hi jillion you certainly have been through it. I am also lying in bed, result of over doing it yesterday in the garden. This is a great site, as it helps one not to feel guilty, at yet again the inevitable tiredness and headaches which keep returning. Try not to think about work, your sort of job is so essential that when you are well enough they will be crying out for you. You are the most important person at the moment, sah's take their time, I have learnt as all of us have to, all the will in the world will not make a tired brain cooperate, rest and all our best wishes love Jillxx