mountain

Thx everyone who responded. I did some more research, thanks to the links provided, and things are a lot clearer for me now. I asked him to read all your responses and tell me, if that is how he feels like and....yes, that is how he feels. This is helping me so much to be more patient, knowing it isn't him being unmotivated, it is due to his braininjury. Good luck to everyone here and hoping that everyone will have the best possible recovery!

Thanks again for explaining to me how he might feel. He doesn't really talk about how he feels but I know he is frustrated a lot of times. It will be easier for me to not get frustrated now, since I understand better how he feels. If I suggest an activity, be it biking, hiking or kayaking ...he is all for it right away, no problem. But he hardly suggests anything on his own, I guess that is where the problems with .....getting started ......comes in. Same goes for sex;-) And Sandi K, we live in the same city!!!

Thank you all for posting, it is really helpful. Problem is, we have tried making lists....they are on his desk where he spends a lot of time, but he doesn't look at them. And to me it doesn't look like he gets very tired, he is just extremly unmotivated to do what needs to be done. There are also problems of physical closeness, he hardly ever initiates sex anymore. And we do play games which should help his memory. He had an evaluation done about a year after the aneurysm and was told, that his cognitive abilities are still there. Any more ideas?

Hello everyone. My SO/hubby had an aneurysm in 2007, it leaked and then, during surgery it burst. Physically he came out fine but his personality changed. When I met him, a year before his aneurysm, he was a very high energy person, always doing something, trying to solve problems...just very energetic and full of life. After his aneurysm he became kind of "dull", if that is the right word. He doesn't want to do much, he has problems focusing and keeping focused at work as well. Short term memory problems too. Age is probably not helping much (he is 62 now), but is physically in excellent health (we both are kind of healthnuts, lol). I just find I am having a hard time with him being so unmotivated. I am the one who has to constantly ask...is that done, could you do that....and it grates on me. It is almost like having a teenager all over again. He is 90 % good with me asking him, he goes and does it right away. But for me, it still feels like I am kind of his mother not his wife. How are others dealing with this? Any ideas how he could improve his memory and energy level? As I said, we eat exceptionally well, we exercise, we don't have much stress (besides not much work because of the economy) but all over, I would say our stress level is low. Thanks in advance.