I can’t actually believe I haven’t thought to look and see if there were any forums or support groups on SAH’s before now! I’ve had a browse through some posts (it’s past my bedtime but after visiting dad today my mind is on overdrive) and I’ll definitely need to have an in depth read tomorrow, you all seem like such a lovely bunch.
My dad had a catastrophic SAH nearly 9 weeks ago. I actually can’t believe he survived but he’s still here plodding along despite many complications, vasospasm, a tracheostomy and recurring infections. He’s been ‘awake’ for about 7 weeks but neurologically hasn’t made much development since then. I don’t even know if he knows I’m there. Some days he seems more present than others.
He can’t speak yet, or respond, or indicate he understands anything. The last 2 weeks he’s been a bit more responsive, turning his head more, moving his left hand, looking around, if you make a loud noise he sometimes looks towards it.
I know it’s a long, long road and everyone recovers at their own pace, and it’s really impossible to know how each individual will recover if at all. You try to figure out what the next step is but all the doctors can (understandably) tell you is “we have to see how he goes”.
I’m really struggling mentally with it. We’ve had a difficult relationship but at the end of the day he’s my dad and I love him, it just adds to the heartache of it all. That on top of trying to travel up regularly (I live 2 hours away so I’m only managing once a week), protect him from greedy family members, trying to make the right decisions and asking the right questions for him.
It’s a lot of pressure. And this may sound absolutely terrible, but in the state he’s been in for such a long time, I wonder if he doesn’t get better then what was the point of all this treatment? Would it have been kinder for them to have let him go? And then I feel terribly terribly guilty. Even though I know it would be his worst nightmare.
How did you all cope when your loved one was in hospital and the outcome wasn’t clear? How did you stay strong? What got you through?
If you got this far, thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings
Have a great day