Hey thanks for the replies ,
They've used radiation to seal up the AVM over 5 years, but they couldn't do anything about the bleed. As for how I feel in myself I feel cheated and it's all really coming around that these are problems that I'll have for the rest of my life. I know that I can work around them if I work hard enough, but I think the worst part is I have a lot of resentment, and there isn't anyone to blame, it's just crappy luck,
Same for me, my concentration is hard, even when I'm writing this I have trouble focusing on what I'm doing. My memory is a problem as well, which frustrates me as well.
Uni have been great, they've given me flexibility with deadlines, extra time in exams and open book exams as my visual memory isn't as sharp as it used to be. But I don't want to mess it up by being stubborn when I should have taken another year out.
I really didn't want to talk to anyone about it, but when I finally did I found out that a lot of people actually have a lot of problems that I didn't have a clue about! So that's been a good bonding experience and made me realize how people's lives really are.
Anya I didn't at first but then I finally decided it was the right thing to do (counselling I mean), you can't go through something like this unscathed it seems. Dropping my pride was one of the best things I've done. It's nice to spill out all your emotions on someone you don't know for some neutral advice.
I suppose I'm really looking for someone to make the decision for me (as doing that myself is incredibly hard) and I'm at a loss as to what I should do now. I don't like working because it reminds me how sick I am, but that's just something I have to power through.
It's nobody's fault, it's completely random and there's no way I could have stopped it. That's what I'm struggling with. I also hated that no-one else I knew my age had gone through this sort of thing, so it's great hearing that we're all in the same boat
That and being 21 is far too young for this, and it was all going well before this, I know I can get to the same point but I hate that I can't do that straight away.
You guys feel the same?