Jump to content
Search In
  • More options...
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

Hello!

By registering with us, you'll be able to view our forums in full as well as discuss, share and private message other members of Behind The Gray. Why not join us now?
caw

Resume work - how and when?

Recommended Posts

This is my thread charting my visit to a Neuropsychologist ..

Worth  just putting the word ‘neuropsychology’ as a search if you want to learn more from others experiences in this space,

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi all, just an update on my return to work so far.

 

I resumed my office job this Monday, 6 months post-SAH. The first two or three days was quite fine with good spirits and energy, possibly fueled by adrenaline and also because no one dared to give me real work. Originally I didn't feel I was too different from what I used to be, though in the afternoon tightness in the head and mild headache kicked in. It also took considerable more time to digest even slightly more complicated material.

 

Today, however, I am feeling more fatigued. Tired as soon as I got up. Difficulty in concentration even in the morning. Some soreness and tightness in the neck and pelvis. Frustration and panic as I could not multi-task.  I guess this means my energy level and stamina are just not yet back at where they are used to be.  Fingers crossed there will be continued progress.

 

Even though not entirely unexpected and mentioned by some BTG friends before, I found it quite difficult to handle colleagues and friends' casual comments. They are certainty well intentioned and probably meant to lighten up the mood, but it still hurts when they say things like "everyone has headaches" "fatigue is part of working life". At times I feel like being somewhat slighted and belittled. Other times I doubt if I am too self-absorbed / pitying.

 

Pray that I will learn to adjust and adapt to the new pace and mentality.  Hope everyone is doing well here at BTG :)

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

They mean well but cannot see the brain trying to think as quick as it used to Caw.

 

You will get good days and some days you might feel like shouting at them (I did with my Family) 

 

I cannot take others sob stories anymore, poor sister she loved a moan and I can only cop with happiness and life isn't like that.

 

I sing and think happy thoughts, good job my Mum left me with happy memories XX 

 

You stick at it and hope you make it XX Now go get em XX As for getting startled I am a back seat driver omg  every car is out to hit us ha .

 

Be well and remain full of hope.  Good luck  or I'll sing to you and it isn't good !!

 

Win xxxxx

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 hours ago, caw said:

They are certainty well intentioned and probably meant to lighten up the mood, but it still hurts when they say things like "everyone has headaches" "fatigue is part of working life".

Hey there

I'd be pointing out that you don't have a headache - you have a brain injury and also, if they had fatigue, they'd be dead on their feet.  A common misconception that fatigue is tiredness - its not, huge difference between fatigue and being tired.  Fatigue is NOT part of working life, tiredness can be, but if fatigue was part of working life the country would come to a standstill.

 

Don't feel slighted or belittled by their ignorance, no matter how innocent and well meant it may be.  Only you know how you're feeling and it took me a good year to stop needing mid afternoon naps - I was lucky enough at the time to be working for the family business so could nap - work in  from 9am to 6pm would have been impossible otherwise.  Now, 13 years on, I work in a very busy, primary school office but still occasionally feel fatigued and always have to have an evening "siesta" on a Friday.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi,

 

I think those comments are a defensive mechanism on their part.  They don't know how to handle what has happened to you and so they try to 'normalise' your condition by making light of it. I don't think it is malicious at all.  They are frightened by something that has happened to you, that is so close to home, and are worried it might happen to them.

 

So talk to them about it. Bring it up in normal conversation and you normalise it - but with facts and the truth!  People are less afraid when they understand it.  Keep on talking about it, in little chunks maybe, but keep it near the top of your topic list.

 

As Skippy says, it is a brain injury, not just tiredness. People still talk to me about their memories not being what they used to be when they can't remember where they put their keys or phone. My short term memory is improving and is not nearly as bad as it once was. I am nine years out, nearly!

 

Sometimes not only can I not remember what was said, I can't even remember having the conversation!  But I've leaned to live with it now and I write things down if I think I need to remember because it may have some importance!  C'est la vie!

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

caw, I would download some of the brain injury fact sheets from the Brain and Spine Foundation and maybe ask people to take a read. Also I did a blog at my work which explained what fatigue was actually like ,I.e. not just being tired or overworked, and that helped me so maybe ask or find a way to enlighten them.

 

Sounds like they are trying to be empathetic but of course the only people who will really know are anyone else who has chronic condition or experienced similar.

 

Forgive them their clumsiness, most people aren’t confident about this kind of hidden disability, but you can help them understand how much their understanding and Help now  will pay dividends in future.

 

My best advice, worry less about others peoples thought if you can and put that to one side. I expect most are just hoping you are ok. Concentrate on Working out what is going to be helpful for you right now And don’t overdo it. It’s not a sprint or competition, you need time to regain mental and cognitive stamina  and remember you are running with a bruised brain that’s trying to heal at the same time . Eat well, keep hydrated and be kind to you. 

 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...