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Devastated by this news. My SAH was almost ten years ago. It was some time before I found out about this site and when I joined Win was one of the first people to greet me and she told me about singing and having a laugh. I didn't think much of it at first but then one day she said something very profound and it has stuck with me ever since.  She told me there was always someone worse off than yourself, and rather than be miserable and look on the down side of life, I should look for new opportunities as the 'new you.'

 

It didn't dawn on me until a couple of days later what she was really saying- my flash to bang time wasn't very good after my SAH - that she was indeed talking about herself, and she was basically telling me I should count myself lucky. I could still see my kids and grandkids grow, I could still walk and talk and look forward to going back to work, albeit in a reduced capacity, and so on.

 

The more I thought about it, I thought that's one savvy, gutsy lady, what have I got to cry about. From that realisation day on,  I always tell people to look on the bright side of life, have your sad moment, but then get back on your feet and take the world on and get the most out of life.

 

That's what Win did for me - and she told me in that most British, English way - with classic, understated brilliance and simplicity that I only had to open my eyes to see. 

 

Thanks Win, RIP Sleep tight.

 

Macca

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I loved your mom so very, very much. She was my great friend and I will miss her dearly. Love to you and your family. Carolyn

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I am very sorry for your loss. Whenever I read anything from Win I though she has such a positive attitude and was always trying to help others in their recovery . I was very sad to read this news indeed. 

 

xxx

 

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Dearest Sarah,

 

i had not been on in a bit and this is the first thread I came upon. I am so shocked and saddened for the loss to BTG but know it is nothing compared to what you and your family is  enduring. Win has been such a bright light to us all, always ready with encouragement and so good at teaching us to laugh at and accept ourselves. She will be so sorely missed. Prayers of comfort for you and your family, including Tilly.  It was so clear how very much she loved you all.

 

Colleen

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Hi Sarah

 

So glad that you liked them - we all thought the brightness reflected your mum's warmth and personality.  

 

Lots of love and many, many hugs  Sami xxx

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  • 4 weeks later...

 

 

Sarah, the thoughts of all Winnie`s BTG friends have been with you, Al and your family during the past month.

 

Winnie made such a lasting impression on us all, and we felt a BTG celebration and tribute would be so appropriate for your mum.

 

https://web.behindthegray.net/topic/8969-a-celebration-of-the-life-of-win-betts/

 

 

 

 

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  • 4 weeks later...

Sarah, I am so sorry for your loss.

 

It's been about 2 years since I visited the forum, and then only for a short time in the early days of my wife's SAH recovery, but I immediately remembered your mother as soon as I read your message.  She was among the first to reply to my posts each time, with compassion and humor.

 

Just now, I looked back at her first reply to me and I saw a bit of advice I realize should have been more careful to follow all along: "Do not let wife hear sad stories of doom and gloom.  I cannot take sadness anymore !!"

 

Thank you Win.

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Hello Sarah

 

I have not been on BTG for many months, and this is the first post I have read.  I have been dreading reading such news of other BTG members.  I cannot express strongly enough how precious and beautiful your lovely mum was.  Her replies to my posts gave me hope, they made me smile, and helped me to be grateful every day.  I could always imagine her singing at the top of her voice with gusto! 

 

As you well know, Win shared her sunshine and wisdom so generously with everyone who stepped through the virtual doors of BTG.   I am very sorry you have lost your mum, especially under such trying circumstances and not being able to be with her.  My dad also died suddenly of heart failure nearly 10 years ago, he was alone at home, 1200km from me, it was a huge shock at the time.  Sending lots of love and hugs of comfort from Australia to you. 

 

xx Veronica

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  • 5 weeks later...
  • 4 weeks later...

Sarah 

 

I'm shocked and saddened by mums passing i don't come on here very often due to some very serious health concerns which involve hospitalisations please remember the good times and remember mum will always be in your heart and in everyones memory  hugs and cuddles sweetheart just take time for yourself xxx

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Thank you Paul. I remember you from all those years ago back in 2009 when I discovered BTG while searching about SAH’s and all the advice you gave. I’m glad I could tell her about this site because it really helped her and when she was nominated for a stroke award she was chuffed to bits.

 

Mums passing was very sudden and unexpected. One minute she was fine and the next she got very ill. We thought her shunt had failed but it turned out to be heart failure.

 

Thank you also to the others who have replied and for your kind words. I do read them all but I don’t always come on here to reply, not as chatty as my mum was 😇 but the messages are appreciated.

 

We got a memorial for her at the crematorium. We thought it right that ‘keep smiling and singing’ was on it.

 

Sarah.

 

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Sarah, beautiful fitting words for your wonderful mum, brought tears to my eyes.

She was a very special lady, who touched so many people lives. 

When I think of Win, it's always with a smile on my face and a song, she was just a very special person. Xx

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Sarah, just beautiful and can only echo Michelle. Win really was such a special lady in every way and always made me smile. :) 

Thoughts are with you and family. xx

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  • 2 weeks later...

Sarah

 

i am saddened to hear this news. I don’t check this site often enough so I apologize for the delayed response. Win was a pleasure to know and I always enjoyed her upbeat comments and singing. I am thankful to have known her on this site. 
 

Chris

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