Frustrated newbie - Monique

[Mon]

Hello, my name is Monique and I had a nightmare migraine on xmas day and woke up just after new year in hospital. I had 2 aneurysm, and clipping procedure (sorry I dont have my discharge summary and can not remember the medical terms) 

 

I have a family history of aneurysms. One killed my mother when she was 48. I turned 45 just 2 days prior to xmas.

 

I am (was) a fit and healthy mother of 3 boys. I worked full time as a care giver. I never get sick, cant ever remember staying in bed all day and I'm finding the boredom is making me depressed. I just dont know what to do with myself. 

 

I generally feel tired all day but unable to sleep at night ( I used to sleep well ) I think I'm lucky if I'm even getting 4 hours sleep a night.

 

Will this go away? Will I get stronger? Can i do any thing to improve my energy levels?

 

[Super Mario]

Welcome to BTG Mon

 

Although we are unable to give medical advice as we are not medically qualified we can support you in your recovery journey.

 

Try to have a nap during the day which may help you sleep at night, fatigue is a well documented after effect of an SAH. Drink plenty of water to keep you well hydrated. If you feel able, take a short walk during the day. Apart from breaking the day up and you getting some fresh air, it may also help with your sleep and boredom. 

 

It is a long road to recovery for most, your brain has had an onslaught and needs time to heal which varies from person to person.

 

Do you read, if so, try audio books, even though you may be only able to manage a couple of pages at a time. Try to pursue any hobbies you may have but doing little at a time. I used to try to complete puzzles in puzzle books although not very successfully at first. Do not push yourself, get your boys to help with tasks around the house.

 

I'm afraid that it means taking baby steps at first, do not push yourself or you will find yourself going backwards.

[DigglyDog]

Hi Monique,

 

You'll get loads of good advice here from those much more experienced than me - only just over two years in for me - but I can fully empathise with the frustration of not being the 'old you'.

 

It's hard to accept that things that were second nature now seem so difficult, but it does get easier, just takes a while. You might find it useful to search this site for stuff on mindfulness. 

 

I confess to be being a bit cynical about the touchy feely stuff initially but I've found that using some of the meditation techniques have helped me get thought the really tough times and helped break the downward spiral of fatigue and frustration. I was fortunate in having a relative who helped me with it, but have a read through and give it a try. 

 

[ClareM]

Welcome to BTG Monique, sorry to hear that a SAH spoiled your Christmas and New Year but glad to hear you are on your road to recovery. Sorry to say but it may be a longer haul than you would like but with positivity and determination you will get there.

 

It is very hard to accept that things are not as before but you will eventually reach your new normal and it will be different but not necessarily worse. I am coming up to 6 years post bleed and it's been a rollercoaster ride, mainly regarding work.

 

I like you was never sick and did not believe I had to be off work for so long. I resorted in the end to cleaning out one cupboard a day - and that was all I could manage. Everything made me so tired that I had to spend a lot of time just sitting which was not me. I gradually built up my stamina and started taking short walks and eventually getting back to running which is my favourite pastime.

 

Work has been another long haul, I have now changed from working 40 hours a week to just 22.5 with 2 days off. I've changed my job 3 times since the bleed mainly due to stress which really is a no no for me. Hopefully this is it and I won't have to change again before I retire.

 

Take it slowly, drink plenty of water and be kind to yourself. Regarding sleep, as SM has said sometimes a nap during the day can help with night time sleep. If it gets unbearable speak to your GP as I found a sleeping tablet once a week made a huge difference but please speak to your doctor first.

 

Take good care

 

Clare xx

[ann_calgary]

Hi Monique,

 

Welcome to BTG. We are glad you joined. You will find the most helpful and compassionate people here.

 

I'm sorry to hear you are having a hard time. All you are feeling I (most of us) have gone through. Know that it is ok to feel that way. Your SAH is so recent. Mine happened in July and the first 1 was 10 years ago. Give your self some time to adjust. I too felt isolated and still sometimes do. Thankfully I have great friends who keep me company.

 

Having 3 boys must keep you very busy. I have 1 boy and my husband who sometimes act like a child. haha. Although I am in constant pain from the headaches, I appreciate the time I have to just rest and not be on the go all the time. The pain, fatigue and energy level has improved. You will get stronger but do allow yourself time to heal. You will eventually get there.

 

Sending you positive and healing thoughts!

[Catwoman23]

Welcome. Please take time and read many threads here. You will find them very helpful. I know things are frustrating with the way the world is today but take one day at a time. Try breathing exercises, insight meditation, hydration, no noise for a period of time etc.

 

Suggest these books

Finding peace in frantic world and Loving kindness. 
Good luck to you.

[Mon]

Thank you everyone for your replies, suggestions and kind words.

 

I introduced myself first and then started to read through the forums and posts, there was so much information that was relevant to me, i found the answers I was looking for in there, not so much what I wanted to hear but I do understand things much better now.  I especially loved the letter to my brain.

 

Thank you