So worried about my husband

[Vivien]

Hi Mel, glad to hear your husbands scans were good, sounds like he is doing well for only 3 months from his SAH, my memory is still bad and I am 2 and a half years on! at first it used to scare me, now it makes me laugh.

I had a gastroscopy a few years ago, got a spray on the back of my throat and down went the tube it is not as bad as you think it is going to be, and I think they know that most people are scared of having this done.

Good Luck

Vivien x

[Tina]

Hi Mel Good news on the scans for your hubby....and yes we all suffer from short term memory etc....i still do at nearly 2 years Wishing you well for your gastroscopy...take care love Tina xx

[Janet]

My short term memory is still quite bad as well and I'm very nearly 3 years on. Glad the scans were clear that must be a big relief to you both. Good luck with the Gastrscopy.

[Louise]

My memory is bad at times more when I'm tired but heaps better than at the start just takes time....

[jess]

Hi there my memory can still be bad on occasions too tell hubby not to worry. Jess.xxx

[melbury]

I am hoping that I can pick your brains!

My husband saw the doctor on 23rd December and he has been signed off for a further two months.

Does anyone know what the situation is with sick pay?? He is currently on half pay from work, but this will stop shortly and then presumably he will get SSP for a while, but my understanding is that this is only for a maximum of 28 weeks from when he was first ill. He will actually be over the 28 week limit by the time this sick note runs out.

I don't know what we are supposed to do then:frown:

Would be grateful for any advice from those of you who are in/or have been in a similar situation.

Many thanks,

Mel

[Super Mario]

I think he then has to apply for ESA after SSP runs out. Your best bet would be to ring the DWP helpline or your local Job Centre plus for advice. If you do it now before they shut it will put your mind at rest for over the weekend.

Edited December 31, 2009 by penny

[melbury]

Does anyone else suffer from being very emotional post SAH?

My husband's personality has changed so much since the SAH - he is very emotional and gets upset at the drop of a hat, even crying sometimes. Also he has no patience doing silly little things, for example like trying to open a packet of biscuits.

Even nearly six months down the line he is still very dizzy and has no energy, yet is going to have return to work quite soon.

It all seems very unfair to me, anyone who has suffered something as traumatic as a brain haemorrhage should be allowed at least a year off and get some kind of special sick pay. As many people on here have said, just because someone looks OK doesn't mean that they are back to normal.

[paul99]

mel have pmd you try not to worry will try and help you

[Tina]

Hi Mel....this is very normal, it is still such early days.....i was the same,emotions all over the place, still can be at times.....it is so frustrating, just trying to do the smallest thing. The extreme tiredness is also very debilitating. Makes me mad that people that really need help, find it so hard. There just is not the support out there that should be for SAH. I have been very lucky i have a very understanding GP. Can you speak to your GP and ask for a further Med 4 for 6 months ? I was hoping to be back to work...but am not quite ready. I have a Doctors note for another 3 months. The stress of having to go back to work will not help your husband if he is feeling this way....let alone be able to cope going back to work! Your GP centre should have someone that can advise you....ask your GP. I wish you both well , hope you get the help you deserve. take care , love Tina xx

[melbury]

Hello to you all, I haven't been posting for a while but do pop onto the site now and then to keep an eye on everyone!

My OH is still not back at work, he is no better, if anything his memory is deteriorating - he just can't remember words and names. Is this normal? Also he still gets very dizzy and nearly falls over if he puts his head at certain angles. It is all very frustrating, I just want him back the way he was:frown:

He also has this terrible problem with his gut/digestive system that they can't seem to sort out and this has come about since the SAH.

Sorry to moan so much, it just all gets me down sometimes.

[rod123]

Hi Melbury,sorry to hear about your worries with you husband, but i think there is no such thing as normal,as everyones recovery is different i read of people who have returned to work after just a few weeks and people who are off for very much longer than that, my wife merrill had her sah on march 27th last year and a month later she had a shunt fitted due to hydrocephalus, but she still has very poor short term memory and very poor mobility, her cognative thought is not always good,and many minor problems along the way,this week she's having hearing aids fitted,as it has affected her hearing, but recovery is very much an individual process in as much as it is different for everyone,Merrill goes to rehab hospital,who said to me right from the start that an sah is very much a life changing thing, and that the old merrill has gone, they even gave me counciling for this as i think they thought that i was having trouble accepting this, they gave me a piece of advice which i thought was a bit silly at the time and that was (do not compare her to who she was but accept her for who she is) but we had been to gether for 40 years so that was not a piece of advice that was easy to follow. With Merrill things have changed all the time,we have just had 3 not very good weeks where i thught she was getting worse,and the last couple of days she has been better than she has been for a long time, and i think thats just how it is, maybe in a week or so things will improve for a little while, but the last twelve months for us have been good times and bad times but i think slowly the good times get better, i hope this helps a little, and you soon get some of the good times, Best wishes Rod

[paul99]

mel

im sorry you are finding it hard going and the fact that hubby is having more complications causing you more worry you dont say where you are from please try and contact headway to get some support for you and hubby they don't charge they deal with the after effects of head injury and are very helpful and could help with his memory as for feeling dizzy the only thing i can suggest is silly but try not to bend in the way which makes him dizzy you could try a cervical collar which keeps his head locked in place uncomfortable i know but if it stops the dizzyness then its a help as for his tummy trouble i can only think of putting him on a bland diet for a while and if its settles then a little bit at a time until he can accept his diet this is only a suggestion because i hope the drs are trying their best please try and accept that its going to be a very long haul for hubby to recover as rod has said accept him the way he is then you will see improvements in time abeit a little at a time but he should make small advances over the next few months your not moaning your worried and scared as most of are and thats one of the reasons btg is so good we can let it all hang out you have my number call sometime take care and chin up sweetheart it does get better promise hugs and cuddles sweetheart

[Super Mario]

Hi Melbury

I can only tell you of my experience. I also go very dizzy when my head is in certain positions, for example, if I bend down, look up or look left to right. I have found that if I close my eyes or focus on one particular point when making these movements helps. It has improved slightly over time, but after 6 years I doubt that I will get any better for me, but who knows.

Your husband will learn coping strategies that suit him and you never know the situation may change in the future.

Sorry I can't be any more help.

[Karen]

Hi Mel,

Dizziness and balance problems are the absolute pits! I persisted with my GP and he referred me to my local hospital for balance tests. My bleed was near to the cerebellum at the back of the head, which controls balance etc., so it looks as though it could have been damaged.

Please take your husband back to the GP and ask if he might refer him for some balance tests and maybe even some routine blood tests, to make sure that he's not deficient in any thing ... but may be he's already had these done? I was found to be both calcium and iron deficient (anaemia) post SAH, which can also make you feel light headed and exacerbate the problem. Since taking the supplements, I have felt a lot better, but haven't totally got rid of the dizzy spells.

After I had the balance tests, I was also referred for physiotherapy. Mainly head, eye and neck exercises and re-training the brain to get used to these spells .... it did help, as my neck was also very stiff after the bleed and it didn't help with my lack of head movement, to try to prevent the dizziness! I also had eye problems, so they gave me exercises for those too. The exercises, especially the head turning ones, often took me out of my comfort zone, but it did help.

It's good to "normalise" a lot of the fall out from a SAH, as it does help to realise that you're not alone with symptoms, but would always say to people, that just because most SAH'ers do find these after affects fairly normal, that it doesn't mean to say, that we shouldn't seek help. There is help out there and sometimes you just have to be persistent and keep going back to the GP. If you don't ask or keep on, nothing will be offered to you and it's certainly worth having a shot at something, as there's nothing to lose.

It's also very easy to lose your confidence after a SAH, especially with severe dizzy spells and it will impact on your day to day life, as you don't sometimes, even want to walk out of the back door to the bin! This can also increase your level of anxiety and it's certainly something that I've experienced. It's certainly no fun having to put up with this and I must say, it's one of the hardest things health wise and mentally to have to manage.

I think that the memory problems, can also be exacerbated by stress, anxiety and fatigue. If he's trying to function with severe dizzy spells, then I would doubt that it's helping him with his memory.

Sorry, I can't help with the tummy problem. It could be something that's completely unrelated to the SAH?

Hope that you can persuade your other half to go back to the GP .... wishing you the very best. xx

[Ern]

Hello Mel.

I had my SAH in October 2006.

I went back to work in April 2007.

physically I was ready for it. but mentaly I was not ready. However. Every one of us is different.

I suffered with very bad mood swings and got frustrated with not being able to find the words I was looking for. But I managed to get some brilliant counselling and things are so much better for me now (apart from needing a new job as this one's so boring! )

My memory is still really bad.

I suppose that at the moment things look pretty bleak. But with time and patience things will get better.

Ern.

PS. It took them a week to spot my SAH & then another week to coil me.

[caz]

hi melbury

sorry to hear hubby is having problems. I too have had dizzy spells since sah and have tablets to try and help with this so worth talking to gp about it. i also have regurgitation and reflux which they think was caused by pain killers that i had post craniotomy and coiling. i dont know if this is the same for hubby bvut diet can help a bit if it is the same. best wishes to you

caz x

[melbury]

hi melbury

sorry to hear hubby is having problems. I too have had dizzy spells since sah and have tablets to try and help with this so worth talking to gp about it. i also have regurgitation and reflux which they think was caused by pain killers that i had post craniotomy and coiling. i dont know if this is the same for hubby bvut diet can help a bit if it is the same. best wishes to you

caz x

Thanks Caz, he is now trying gluten and wheat free diet to see if that helps, has already tried lactose free, but that didn't make any difference. The problem wasn't caused by any medication because he wasn't given any after he left hospital (he had a non-aneurysmal bleed).

Glad to hear you are getting on well.

All the best,

Mel x