it all started on may 9th 2010. it was a sunday morning and i had come home after spending the night at my boyfriends house. my dad who was 56 years old was sat having his usual morning cup of tea and a smoke. i rushed around getting dressed as my sister was coming for me to go out for sundays dinner. me and my sister left at approximately 1.30 and when we got back at 3.30 we had the shock of dad being lay on the sitting room floor with agonising pains in his head, the pain was so bad he couldnt even speak to tell us what happened. we got straight on the phone to 999 and a few minutes later an ambulance arrived. all dad could say was "my head, my head" as soon as the paramedics moved him, he started vomiting and it looked like he was having some sort of fits as his head was shaking uncontrollably. the paramedics managed to get him into the ambulance to do tests to try and find out what was happening.
after 10mins or so the paramedics come back to tell us they didnt know what was wrong and were taking him straight to hospital. me and my sister jumped straight into my car and followed the ambulance to the hospital. after my dad received a CT scan it was confirmed he had a small bleed on his brain. the hospital he went too didnt have the neurosurgeons to be able to operate so he was going to get transferred to james cook where an operation could be performed straightaway. in the meantime the hospital he was at gave him morphine which sent him to sleep for a couple of minutes but he woke up in even more pain. the nurses told me and my sister that the ambulance was ready to transfer him to james cook so we told dad he was going to ok and that we would see him soon. i wish i knew that was the last time i was going to see him conscious. anyway me and my sister left the hospital and drove to james cook so we'd be there waiting for him when he arrived. after an hour passed he still never arrived so we went to the nurses to find out what was going on. the nurses rang north tees and they told us that dad deterioated 2 minutes after we left him so he couldnt get transferred yet. we drove back to north tees and a nurse took me and my sister into a room to tell us they took dad for a second CT scan which showed his bleed was out of control and that they had to sedate him as he was losing consciousness and had to be put on a ventilator to control his breathing. we went in to see dad lying on a bed full of tubes and a machine breathing for him. at this point i dont think it sunk in what was happening, it felt like i was having a bad dream and couldnt wake up. we sat with dad for a while then the nurses recommended we went home to get some sleep as he wouldnt be getting transferred to james cook for a few hours yet. i kissed dad on the head and told him i loved him then left to go home. i just hope he could hear me! after getting home me and my sister sat up all night ringing the hospital every hour to see if he had been transferred yet. finally at 5am he had been so we sorted ourselves out and drove to james cook. as the day went by sitting by dads side, the whole family was called in and we were took into a side room for the neurosurgeons to tell us there was nothing they could do for dad. we were told that within 24 hours he would be braindead. at 6 pm we left the hospital to get some rest as the last 24hrs had been the longest day of our lives. just 2 hours later we got a call from the hospital telling us to go back as they done a test on dad which confirmed he was brain dead. we got back to the hospital and i just sat looking at him, holding his hand and not believing what was happening. after spending the last hour with him it was time to let him go. the nurses came in and switched off his ventilator and i had to sit there watching his heart beat getting slower and slower finally it stopped. i couldnt take my eyes off his chest and once his heart stopped i looked up at him and realised he was gone. ive never cried so much in my life. i couldnt and still cant believe this could happen. my dad was fit and healthy and within 24 hours he was gone. i havent just lost my dad, ive lost my best friend too. its been 4 month now and i miss he so much and always will. R.I.P dad, love you always xxxx
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