hi all my name is marie and i had a sah on the 11th jan 2012 aged 37. i was alone when it happened and when it did i knew it was something bad. i managed to crawl to the front door to open it and phone my loved ones and then i phoned the ambulance. i tried to tell the paramedics that i think something had burst in my head ( my sister had a sah in jan 2001 so i knew what it might feel like ) but they did not belieive me. even though i was a bit out of it i could see the look on the paramedics face as if to say what do you know. in fact the guy asked me if i WANTED to go to hospital and i said EH YEAH. it took the hospital 48 hours to give me a ct scan as apparantly it was busy with emergencies, dont know what i was classed as but hey ho i eventually got it which confirmed it was a sah. i got taken to edinburgh for coiling which went fine and i came home 2 weeks later. my main worry is work as i will not be able to return to the job i was doing before as it was very physical and stressful so am currently on very small sick pay. i cant afford anything at the moment and am currently having to go bankrupt which is a major stress. i just feel so sad all the time and i cry a lot and my motivation is zero. i have no energy to do stuff with my 9 year old daughter ( and no money ) which is playing on my mind and am worried about our future. i went to my doctor last week to ask about getting to speak to someone but he said that could take months and that i really needed to start taking antidepressants straight away. i have done some reading about them and they dont sound very nice so at present i still haven't taken them. i also have good days in between which makes me question my depression. i feel so worthless sometimes like a bit of a waste of space and a hinderance on others and there has been days when i have thought maybe it would of been easier if i had died. i want to know if i will ever get through this and should i take the antidepressants. i am also thinking about who would employ me now? what use am i to anyone? any words from anyone would be appreciated as you all seem so nice. thanks for listening.
SAH and left with depression
in Introduce Yourself
Posted
hi all my name is marie and i had a sah on the 11th jan 2012 aged 37. i was alone when it happened and when it did i knew it was something bad. i managed to crawl to the front door to open it and phone my loved ones and then i phoned the ambulance. i tried to tell the paramedics that i think something had burst in my head ( my sister had a sah in jan 2001 so i knew what it might feel like ) but they did not belieive me. even though i was a bit out of it i could see the look on the paramedics face as if to say what do you know. in fact the guy asked me if i WANTED to go to hospital and i said EH YEAH. it took the hospital 48 hours to give me a ct scan as apparantly it was busy with emergencies, dont know what i was classed as but hey ho i eventually got it which confirmed it was a sah. i got taken to edinburgh for coiling which went fine and i came home 2 weeks later. my main worry is work as i will not be able to return to the job i was doing before as it was very physical and stressful so am currently on very small sick pay. i cant afford anything at the moment and am currently having to go bankrupt which is a major stress. i just feel so sad all the time and i cry a lot and my motivation is zero. i have no energy to do stuff with my 9 year old daughter ( and no money ) which is playing on my mind and am worried about our future. i went to my doctor last week to ask about getting to speak to someone but he said that could take months and that i really needed to start taking antidepressants straight away. i have done some reading about them and they dont sound very nice so at present i still haven't taken them. i also have good days in between which makes me question my depression. i feel so worthless sometimes like a bit of a waste of space and a hinderance on others and there has been days when i have thought maybe it would of been easier if i had died. i want to know if i will ever get through this and should i take the antidepressants. i am also thinking about who would employ me now? what use am i to anyone? any words from anyone would be appreciated as you all seem so nice. thanks for listening.
marie