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Robert semple

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Everything posted by Robert semple

  1. Hi Clare, I realise now I really do and will need to take it.The type of job i do as a Parts man requires good memory of numbers and can be at times fast paced which requires a quickness of thinking that I can not handle anymore. When im overloaded I almost freeze and and become so frustrated/embarrased that my mind goes blank. In truth every role I have done since the accidents give me some form of believe that everything will be better if i move jobs but although the salary is now something im happy with it is still a job i can not realistically handle if I dont get the help needed. I can not get my appointment with Headway until the 1st of August.I should hopefully hear from my psychologist in the next few days.In the meantine I will speak to my docs at some point today.I am just waiting on them phoning with an appointment time. I will keep you posted. Thanks.
  2. Good morning Win, We spoke before ..well from that point I regained the way slightly but only for a limited time and never followed up on anything I said I would.This is I can only blame on myself. I start to feel good and then I convince myself I am rid of the issues I have since the injuries.The real truth is I now live day by day and what we say in Glasgow is I am "winging each day" i know deep down I am not who I was and I struggle with tasks I never did before. I am now at a crunch point in my life where this needs to stop and the fact I need to deal with it today is making me very nervy. However I know I need to do it. I understand how you feel when you say you want to tell me everything.I am very like that too. I think because I build it all up that when I finally let go I want to continuously write on here to get it all out.
  3. Hi Jess, So its possible then the way I am now is still related to the injuries I sustained.Deep down I know it is which is where I struggle to accept.I agree it is a vicious circle.I know a need rest but one of my issues is I also can not sit down.If I sit down I become bored/depressed/start to overthink so I become restless and all the other negatives start to come out so I choose to always try and be what I regard positive and move forward or be active but this is giving me big negatives. I am hoping to speak to headway Glasgow at a meeting today.At the moment I am just waiting on them emailing me and also my doctor phoning me. thanks for the reply
  4. Hello, My name is Robert Semple. In December 2013 i was attacked and subsequently ended up with an intrecerebral and extra axial haemorrhage involving front lobes and left inferior temporal lobe. I also had some bleeding in the front of my head due to the fact my brain had moved and my skull was fractured. I wrote on here a few years back and the users helped me and i am hoping the users can again. I have questions that i suppose i need educating on. Firstly, (and maybe naively) just how serious are these? And secondly is it possible that the issues i am having now related to these?or am i looking for something to blame. I have contacted headway Glasgow today along with my brain rehab unit to again open up discussions that i said i would do before but never did. Some of the things i experience everyday are acceptance decision making, tiredness/fatigue, settling/resting, overthinking, mood swings, irritable, separation,anger, ocd, routine and at the moment a big issue is both panicking/anxiety and quickness of thinking. All of these have affected my personal life in a negative way and now they are really affecting worklife to the extent i have jumped between seven jobs since the accident .five of these are in the last year.Today i have walked out the 7th because of anxiety and the slowness of thinking which i need in this job. Any advice or similar stories? Thankyou.
  5. Hi all, Again its been a few weeks since I have posted but my forum is never far from my mind. Here 's a little insight into my life. I have four beautiful kids under the age of nine. the youngest is my son aged nine months now and the others are three beautiful daughters. I work a long day as a workshop supervisor in the motor trade training , hopefully to one day being manager. I rise at seven am to organise the kids with my partner for a nine am start at work. I then work until six and then come home to start another shift in my mind to being a dad whilst my partner then goes to work until 11pm. This is the reason I fail too update as much as I would like too, this life style is maybe also the reason why I have took longer to heal. Talking lately on here has given me the tools and a coping mechanism to get by which is what I believe I needed. lately I have struggled putting some sentences together, thoughts seem to be very unhinged at times ..by that I mean the thoughts and planning seem to be very unsure, so I need to stop and think more which unsettles me and gets me agitated.. This may sound negative but the reason I point them out is purely because I want to point out that this talking and you guys have given me that coping mechanism I referred too before. I may not know you all but I thankyou for your input and appreciate the help and advice along the way. Not long until I meet with headway now?
  6. Hi Clare , My appointment is the 26th of January I am sure. Just waiting on the appointment letter coming through the post. I am hearing Headway is really good so I am looking forward to the visit. My partner's mum has a friend in his 40s who had a similar injury to myself. He has given my family info on how to deal with some difficulties that might arise from in the past but I did not know this until recently. When I mentioned I was going to headway, the family opened up slightly and told me that's where this guy goes a lot. I will defo keep you updated. Thank you x Robert x
  7. Hi all, Been a couple of weeks since I wrote.I have been busy with work being back to normal and the joyful labours of being a parent. Had a lovely Christmas and New Year back at home where I belong. I tried my best at taking rest but soon fell into old habits with being very anxious and my OCD went into overdrive again which in turn makes me angry. i started to notice it but I could not control it. However, the fact I have now learned a little i eventually done some self analysis and realised I should get how I was feeling off my chest and shared it with partner and admitted she started to see it creep in but wanted to see how or if I could deal with it. Once we spoke it was like I had lifted a heavy rock off my shoulders. i just need to realise when it creeps back and deal with it properly. I am managing to help a friend who has similar issues at the moment which feels really good and I know another friend of a friend will be doing a charity fundraiser soon for Brain injuries to raise awareness.i am hoping to become involved in that. I hope every one is well?
  8. Hi Win, Everyone's input is great. I am sure this site has helped many people the way it has me. Colleen said a couple of posts ago that she still struggles with fatigue five years on. I am the very same so it's up to me to take that break when required and believe me over the last few days I have, lol. It's been great. I have come home tonight after my shift with a totally different attitude as well.(yes I'm back home ??) I never came in with that feeling of impending doom and stuck to the attitude I have had over the last few days. Quick shower and now relaxing waiting on a takeaway. Cutting out takeaway will be the next step, know any good sites for advice ?lol Here is a question. Do the people on this site ever meet up? Does this site get promoted through the likes of Headway ? I know I will be sure to mention it at my first meeting in January. I intend to keep writing, hopefully people keep reading. Thanks Win
  9. Hi Colleen, Thanks for the reply. It would seem you and myself have suffered very similar setbacks then. The docs did put me on medication, it did help first time round as it slowed me down. When I felt better I decided to come off them as I felt I could - a few months/maybe a year anxiety returned so bad that my whole body ached. I got put on the medication again but this time round I absolutely did not like the effects I was having with it. I just feel that sitting on a couch not having the heart to do anything is the answer. This is the effect I would get. You mentioned coffee and today I have barred myself from it. My fatigue comes bad at night and you're totally correct as I have noticed this. The coffee just does not help as I come down with a crash and it's that point I need to care for the kids as mum works nights. Simple changes in attitude/lifestyles/awareness/understanding should see some real changes in myself I hope. Kind regards Robert
  10. Hi, Finally setting down to begin the book, keep you all posted. Robert
  11. Hi all, Well it's been a busy couple of days with plenty of smiles which has been great Ii have spent time with my family and adapted to just taking things easy. At times I felt like an outsider just looking in but I feel better within myself. That's what opening up and adapting to relaxing has done. I think looking back now I lacked self control with a lot of things that possibly was just about to give me a nervous breakdown. Someone quoted on my forum that has stuck with me. I was probably trying to hard to be the old me but instead it would seem I need to adapt to the new me. The new me seems to be a very confident at talking now. I think this talking will open up barriers that I put there myself. I am feeling good, this site and everyone who has commented has really helped me. I actually found myself getting frustrated as I was struggling to post on it for some reason. I think it was a glitch. Subs helped me with it lol. Thanks Subs A happy Robert ?
  12. Hi Michelle, I am finding this site like a Facebook but I don't and wouldn't talk as frank on fb as I would here. I'm also finding it my most visited place. absolutely at home here. Im finding myself talking more and more as well now about my struggles. I'll keep in touch. Wherever you are and whatever you get up too I hope you enjoy the festivities. xx Robert
  13. Hi, Is it common after these type of injuries to have a numb/strange sensation on the forehead..this is one of the major factors of my personality change that I can not get rid of. The only thing that soothes this is by wearing a head band that creates pressure around my head but helps relief this. Thanks
  14. Hi Skippy, Thank you for reading with interest. It's clear that myself and you maybe suffered similar setbacks now. The more I look into this I am learning that even now after all that's happened in the last few days I still really really struggle with the severity of what happened to me. I still treat it as though it was a sore head. The fact a doctor told me I was not going home after the first day in hospital as he did not understand why I was not dead and if I didn't treat the recovery properly then I still could be. That should maybe have been my realisation of the severity. I would need to look out all my medical files on this as I even chose not to read mine. I know mine was frontal lobe haemorrhage along with one to the rear. My brain also moved when my skull cracked causing bleeding. I intend to take my files to Headway so as they can educate me more and maybe help me open up even more and understand. I am sure the harsh way the doctor told me was not harsh at all, it was just what I call my chimp (from the chimp paradox) interpreting his words the wrong way. I think he had to be direct with me as I was having none of his instructions. I believed I knew better. From the video I watched, regarding James Cracknell there is a quote that resounded with me. Before the accident, I, like others, had bad traits along with good ones. After the accident I was left with only the bad but multiplied by ten. In the three years since I refused to see this until now. If I was more educated and recorded this more I could write a book on this. Never say never though. I am clearly passionate about this. Thank you once again and I sincerely hope you enjoy the festivities Kind regards Robert
  15. Hi Win, Thank you very much. Something had to change, as I said in previous posts I am now living with parents purely because it became too much for my partner to live with me unrelaxed. I still look after my kids at our family home at night and have become used to the small changes my partner has made around the house to make the home a more relaxed environment for all parties. I even managed a nap with my son earlier and we both woke up smiling. I am learning that rest is key, my partner encourages this. I fully intend to keep in touch with this site, as this site amongst other positive changes, is what has given me the realisation that I must adapt to the new me. My plan Is to talk more positively about my accident. There have been highs and a lot of lows. I know I can help other people and I salute every person who has helped along my journey. Looking forward to my first meeting at Headway. Enjoy the festivities whatever you get up to Win. Kind regards Robert
  16. I agree Chris. lots of great advice from people and carers which is greatly appreciated. Thanks for your prayers and wishes. I hope wherever you are you and your family enjoy the festivities. Kind regards. Robert.
  17. Hi Clare, In the past few days I have seen a real difference in myself,three years of keeping it all in has drained me and my family. Now that I have opened up I have no intentions of stopping. My family have been such a help and in the last few days so has this site. I had a lovely chat with a girl from headway today and even opened up to a colleague in work about some of my plans. Sarahs father in law has recently suffered an aneurysm. I knew I could offer advice and prepare her for some of the obstacles her father in law will have along with her family. I mentioned this site so hopefully this site, its members, Headway and myself could maybe help another person. I will start the book over the festive period and I will let you know how it is. Kind regards Robert
  18. Hi, My book has arrived and I'm also booked into a consultation with headway Glasgow on the 26th of January....feeling very liberated....hopefully I can help there and maybe share my experiences. I will keep in touch. Enjoy Christmas everyone.
  19. Hi Daffodil, I am totally excited by this. talking today has already helped me leaps and bounds just by sharing my issues and having people's input has helped to lift the pressure. Carers will know some of the issues I am likely to have put my family through. I have just spoken with my partner about this forum and got excited that maybe I can help someone. She like you had told me just to slow down and take the help before offering it, this is the driven side of me that I must work on to slow down. I will take your advice and take baby steps. The book will arrive tomorrow. I will let you know when I start to read it and give my views on it. Kind regards Robert
  20. Hi Paul99 I would encourage anyone to give me their input. I should have took all this help within the first few months and done things differently. I was that bad that when they told me to rest I joined the gym,when they told me to stop that, I instead bought a bike and a dog to excercise. When I was told to cut back on work I took on a more high pressured job. I maintained all along ,through my anxiety/fatigueness and all the other issues that all I needed to find was some coping mechanisms, today I think I have found my main one, talking. Thankyou for your input.
  21. Thank you Kempse, The support on here is overwhelming. i wish I spoke sooner. A friend told me a couple of years back I should document my journey. i should have listened but it won't be hard to revisit and document. Im excited by my responses. hopefully in the future I can help some one else on here. Kind regards.
  22. Hi Macca, Each and everyone of my replies today has been overwhelming for me.Talking about this today to complete strangers has been very liberating. You say you were considering not getting involved. I can assure you I am so glad you did and I value your input a lot. You touched on the counselling sessions. i had around fifteen sessions with a psycho therapist and you are totally correct. i did listen but not enough I was more annoyed by the whole situation of me sitting in that room being quizzed and advised on what I should do. To cut it short was totally the wrong decision.i just wanted my life to return to normal instantly and I was so so frustrated it didn't. You are also correct that I, at any time can start these sessions again. Taking on the new job maybe came at the wrong time but for me to better myself and family I believed it was correct. I could not let the opportunity pass me by as I had considered it in the past. The injuries gave me the attitude that I only lived once, so I just went for it. Your comments on my kids will love me for me are also very correct . I have noticed this more recently. I am not a bad dad in anyway but the last few years I realise now I have been not easy to live with,i must relax. I started this topic purely to see if anyone had these issues and were they related to my injury. i am glad no one has said no. Macca what I would say to you is never hold back from getting involved. you have just helped me in ways you will maybe never realise. I intend to stay in touch, visit Headway (contacted them today) and I have ordered James Cracknells book and just about to watch his google interview on you tube. Thanks to each and everyone of these comments. feel free to all to input. If I can help /give opinions to anyone then also feel free to contact me. Kind regards. Robert.
  23. Hi Clare, You are a star, I have just ordered this through Amazon, this looks like very good book that will give me better understanding Thankyou xx
  24. Hi subzero, As I read that I genuinely become upset. I discovered the site as I was looking online for forums or places to chat/meet about my issues within a group. The actions I took in the early days which I still try to defend as being positive have impacted my life in very negative way. I now will not lie down to this or admit I need to, clearly maybe I do. On release from hospital I was referred to a brain recovery unit where I met various types of different therapists, the most important one for me helped me with cognitive issues, but I felt it became too deep and when they started to talk to me about how I become a dad again I felt insulted and never returned. I was quizzed on my sudden recovery as I told doctors and therapists I was ok, again, I was not. With regards to my openness with all parties about how I felt about being a victim remains to this day very very deep, burying issues is a trait I can not rid myself of. I prefer to laugh than cry in all situations and just bury the hurt, no one knows my struggles other than my partner who has just joined the site (debbiejg86) Winnie is correct I should adapt to a no stress situation but in my lifestyle it is very hard not to. We have just had a beautiful baby boy and with it all my issues have come more to light as I struggle to cope with various things including noise/routine. I have taken the first steps in admitting I need to reflect and maybe visit headway. To yourself as a carer I salute you because it's just as hard for the carer as you lose a small part of your partner and have to witness first hand the issues that arise with these circumstances. Thankyou
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