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My Dad has had a grade 4 SAH / Confabulation help


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Hello

 

So pleased to have found this site and praying you can help me.

My amazing Dad suffered a ruptured brain aneurysm back in November 2016. It led him to have a grade 4 SAH. He spent 8 weeks in Addenbrookes hospital, EVD then a shunt fitted end of December. He didn't wake up properly until January. He was transferred to our local hospital where he spent 5 weeks before being admitted to a neuro rehab house where he still currently is. We are hoping to get him home within the next few weeks.

 

My Dad is 69 and before all of this was so fit, healthy and active. It's been a devastating time for us. My mum and I have pretty much visited him every day and I go every night to put him to bed and just spend time with him because he is my world.

 

He is slowly regaining the 2 stone he lost, controls his own bladder, he can read, write, talk, eat well and has his old memories. He is still very much 'him' but I guess a different version. If that makes sense. He is getting stronger and uses a frame to walk but needs someone next to him as he suffers with dizziness as he has had damage to his cerebellum. This also causes him involuntary vomiting but this has improved form 2 or 3 times a day to 3 or 4 times a week so I'm hopeful this will pass.

 

My main worry is his confabulation. He will say the most random things. He thinks we are sometimes in Canada (where we lived 30 years ago) He will say things like 'how are you getting home babe..the bus?' when I never get the bus...or he will suddenly decide that he needs to return a car he has hired otherwise he will be fined. Sometimes we can pacify him but other times he is so adamant that we are not listening to him. It's out of character for him to get cross, esp at me but he will just not listen to the point he will try and get up to find this important paperwork (that doesn't exist) His balance is awful so the fear of him falling is massive. He will eventually listen but only normally once we get so upset because it's so hard to handle. He sometimes doesn't recognise my mum and will say things like 'where's your mum' when she's right next to us and when I say 'She's there Dad' He will say, 'No, not her. the other one! and he will not accept he is wrong. This is obviously very upsetting

 

I understand it is early days (he's only really been awake for 6 months) I just want someone out there to reassure me that this confabulation will eventually go...We can handle every thing else. I plan on going round my parents every day to help my mum and to take him to mine so she can have a break but I'm worried we won't be able to handle this confabulation and he is going to be a danger to himself and mum won't be able to cop with him at home  He listens to me more (as we're very close) but I am married with 2 small children and work also so can't always be there at a drop of a hat to help when my mum needs it.

 

I'm feeling very sad and down and hate all of this so so much  I don't want my dad to end up in a care home  

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I have replied to,your message. 

Please dont despair it will get easier in time. Its only natural for,you to feel the way you do right now.

My husband is not the same person as he was prior to the SAH but he is alive and has a good quality of life.

There were and are times when I could quite literally have strangled him and  he does not always behave as I would like but i just go out for a few hours for my own sanity and to teach him a lesson which it does eventually. It might sound harsh but it keeps me sane.

Good luck to you.

If you need any more help let me know

Poppy 

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