hwyaden

i will contact headway. he's in his own room and i've taken a radio and a load of his favourite cd's in for him. i asked him yesterday which cd's he wanted and he nodded at the ones i chose. i think i'm just having a blip. the only other family members who visit are his mum and sister and we haven't spoken in years. they let me know when they're going through my daughters. my mum and dad would love to visit him but the journey is too much for them at their age and my mum would just crumble if she saw him in hospital. they're in their late 80's and they'd never cope. they have been a fantastic support in other ways, funding a replacement car when mine bit the dust just after hubby was taken ill. the rest of his family just don't want to know and can't be bothered to visit so we're pretty much on our own. luckily my 3 eldest daughters are grown up and they've been amazing, looking after the little ones and going to the hospital with me. i just miss him so much and wish he was at least a bit closer if not at home. thanks for all your lovely words of encouragement. it has cheered me up no end.

no, he's wearing adult diapers which must be soul destroying for him. he seems to get through them at an alarming rate as every time we visit he's just wet or worse.

he can't use anything at the moment as he has mittens on to stop him pulling his tubes out he must be bored to tears. i've sorted the tv out in his room but i don't think he's very interested in it. i just don't know what to do for him and just hope this is a phase that soon passes. i was hoping his trachy would have been out this week but they said today he's got another chest infection so i don't know if that will delay the removal again.

hubby was really agitated when we visited today - seeing the kids really upset him and he just kept asking to go home. it was heartbreaking and the nurses had to come and try to calm him down and told me to give him a quick kiss goodbye and leave - it felt like when i left the kids on their first day at school. the nurse asked me when i got there if there was anything i could think of that would calm him down. i left them some of his favourite cd's but the only thing that relaxes him is his computer. he's becoming quite agressive with the staff and is being sedated at night. the nurse said she had no idea how long he'd be in hospital but it would probably be many more months given how serious his brain injury was. i'm just feeling so tired and at the end of my tether. we had to celebrate one of our kids' birthdays yesterday without him and the thought of not having him here at christmas is more than i can bear right now. i have to stay upbeat and positive for the kids but right now i just want to go to bed and cry. when does it start to get better? the nurse said two months is nothing in the recovery of someone with an injury like his but that two months have seemed like a lifetime.

:lol: i think we're going to be in for some fun! i'm not sure yet about his memory until he can start talking but when i ask him if he remembers certain things he sometimes nods or cries so i guess his long term memory is pretty intact.

ooh i missed that - he's progressing slowly but surely i'm keeping everything crossed that they take his trachy out this week, so maybe he can swear at me then as well

a friend of mine who used to nurse patients with brain injuries warned me that because of where hubby's bleed was he might lose his inhibitions when he starts to recover. he's already stripping off his own clothes at every opportunity but i took his mitt off yesterday to stroke his hand and he started removing mine too! our poor teenage daughter didn't know where to put herself! eldest daughter says i need to get a burkha before i next visit

oooh daffodil - don't say he's from oz - new zealanders are proud kiwi's and hate being lumped in with australia welcome to the board, you couldn't wish to 'meet' a better bunch of people than the posters on here, they are a mine of wonderful knowledge on all things brain related (as they know from personal experience, unlike the doctors.....)

i asked tonight and they said this is what hubby had. i didn't know there were so many different types of stroke! he was awake all through visiting tonight and trying really hard to talk to me but i couldn't understand him with his trachy in - i'll be so glad when it's taken out. they've taken the oxygen pipe off it now so hopefully it won't be too much longer

whoops - forgot to update on mr hwyaden the nurses say he's doing very well but i can't see much improvement as he's always fast asleep when i visit the physio's have had him sitting in a chair and have tried sitting him on the edge of the bed but he's not up for that yet. his trachy is still in but i'm keeping my fingers crossed that they'll take it out later this week. i hate it as it's making his chin so sore. i've decided to take monday, wednesday and friday off from visiting to give me a break, though i miss him like crazy when i don't go! our 10 year old has acro classes on wednesday so she needs to get back to that and friday is a nightmare as cardiff fills up with a ridiculous amount of traffic so i want to avoid the city that day as it stresses me out and leaves me feeling grotty for the weekend. i;ve got to try and stop feeling guilty when i don't visit. i imagine him lying there waiting for me, which is probably not the case as he's asleep so much of the time

i will have words with the kids - some are pulling their weight better than others i'll try the porridge - me and hubby used to have a bowl every morning but i've been stuck on cornflakes since he's been gone. i got a very good recipe for microwave porridge from here last week so i'm going to try that! http://agirlcalledjack.com/2013/10/14/mrs-jacks-super-express-portable-porridge-9p/

hi susan, my husband had his stroke 6 weeks ago too. wishing you a speedy recovery and remember time is a wonderful healer so be patient (says the person who has non whatsoever!) and be nice to yourself while your body heals. xxxx

afternoons are the worst for me, but that's always been my sleepy point - i used to fall asleep in double english in school......

please don't feel useless - much better that you get yourself properly well than try to rush back into work and set yourself back. listen to the people on here! they're full of good advice

thankyou peeps. i'm reluctant to ask the doc for anything as it will affect my driving. there's no-one to delegate to as it's just me and the 5 kids at home, though i could be a bit stricter with their chores right now! i'm guilty of living on cornflakes and salad right now - i cook meals from scratch for the kids but can't face eating them myself so i might have to be stricter with my eating habits. if my granny was alive she'd swear by a glass of sanatogen tonic

i've been schlepping back and forth to the hospital for 6 weeks now and i think it's fair to say i'm ****** exhausted. the house is a complete tip - the kids' bedrooms need blitzing completely but all i want to do is nap at every given opportunity. is this normal? how long does it take to pass? can anyone suggest anything that will pick me up a bit (legal substances only LOL). how do you all keep your energy levels up?

that advice is wonderful - i'm going to print it off and keep it safe as a reference for hubby - thankyou so much

We love graze boxes in our house - they're my weekly treat and healthy to boot. I love the list of goodies above - i'm going to print that off and keep it in the kitchen!!!

Wow - 10 days! that gives me panic just thinking about it! i have 6 kids and i love them all dearly, but when the oldest one comes to stay a couple of days is all i can manage. i don't have brain injury, it's my husband who's had a stroke but my ocd is really high right now and panic sets in regularly. It's interesting to read how anxiety and panic attacks are affected by SAH as my husband is bi-polar and had a lot of anxiety issues before. it will be useful for me to be forewarned and know what to look out for when he's recovering so that we don't stress him too much. I bet the views from your house are just amazing!!!

thankyou

also with 4 offspring in the car all chattering at once i managed to prang my lovely new (well secondhand) car yesterday, so if they had that effect on me then no wonder conrad was up all night in agitation

i visit a site called http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/ and i've had some great advice from there when i've been in the middle of an ocd panic attack.

our 5 and 10 year old daughters wanted to visit yesterday and he opened his eyes while they were there. until he woke up our 5 year old was really scared so i just let her sit in the corner and do some colouring. after he woke she started creeping closer and by the time we left she was chattering away to him 10 to the dozen updating him on life he did a lot of crying while we were there yesterday and apparently he was a menace in the night, ripping his pad off and climbing out of bed. it took 4 nurses to get him back in and he had to have diazepam. the staff said he was very calm this morning and listened to their instructions. i went to see him this afternoon and he was back to his usual position of spark out, fast asleep his drain is out, he's just got his feeding tube and trachy left to go.

quick update - he's been moved to the rehab ward!!!

aww thankyou - it's so lovely to hear everyone elses stories. just come back from the hospital and feeling disheartened. i hoped after a few days away i'd see a little change in him but he was no different. he doesn't respond to me at all, just keeps rolling onto his right side over and over again. the nurses aren't sure why he does that but that is all he does apart from inching his way out of bed. the physio's had him sitting up on the edge of the bed while we were there to see if he'd respond to me talking to him but it was heartbreaking to see him sitting there, propped up on either side and not responding, just dribbling. when he first woke up from his coma we had such great hopes as he was so attentive and pulling appropriate faces, but now all that seems to have gone for the time being. the nurse in charge of him today asked us to leave him alone and to stop talking to him and stroking his limbs as he said conrad just wanted to be left alone with no tubes, wires, clothes etc and anything touching him seems to make him more agitated and increases the rolling over. we sat quietly with him for a little while but i couldn't bear being with him and not being able to touch him so we came home. our kids made him a huge collage of family photos for him to look at when he does become more responsive - i like the fact that there were more pictures of the ferrets on it than there were of me