Neil

Nice one, Keith! Hmmm. Think I'll jump on the bandwagon and make my blog googleable now, if it helps anyone at all. I found BTG because I found your blog, so it's not as if this Doctor is the only person you've helped! Just had a thought (yeah yeah, first in about 12 minutes, I know!). Is there a Behind The Gray logo I could add to my blog, please? I have a link already but a clickable logo does stand out a lot more.

Today was my second day back at work! I didn't post yesterday because I was so excited that I forgot! I couldn't wait to tell Tammy about everything, from the embarrassing round of applause as I walked in to the playing about with the brand new fork-lift truck and van and everything in between! Happily it's only a part-time job, albeit quite physical, so I wasn't too worn out afterwards. I did take slightly longer than usual breaks yesterday and today. Felt a bit more sleepy than usual this morning, maybe I ought to get to bed earlier whilst I get back into the swing of things. Good job the gardening got my stamina up a bit over the last coupld of weeks

Thanks Elaine, that means a lot

Hey Paul, The missue-to-be has been nudged and I believe an email is on its way to you

Hi Linda, You can relax now that you've found BTG: this lot are great! Only joined a wee while ago myself and immediately felt better, thanks to everyone being so understanding, so I'm sure you will feel happier soon too. Sounds like you're over the biggest hurdle already then! I had my anuerysm clipped not long before you. I've not had a plate fitted myself, so can't advise on what to expect. I would recommend talking frankly with your Neurosurgeon; he/she will be quite able to put your mind at ease about it all. My N/S was really good and told me everything in gory detail before my op which in fact made me feel a whole lot better and much less scared. Things are more frightening when they're wrapped in mystery! Hope you feel much better very soon, although that certainly isn't an invitation to push yourself hard! Take things at your own pace, always.

Thanks Karen

Talking to me? Blimey, I'm just glad it wasn't shouting! Know what you mean, though. I'm not superman. I just have this tendancy, when I fall off my horse, to get straight back on. Glad I'm only part time when I go back to work next week! I daresay I shall see a return to needing afternoon naps for a wee while

Paul, thanks for sharing your feelings. I'm going to show this to my partner, Tammy. See, I know I'm the one who had the actual SAH but Tammy had to rush me to hospital and watch me writhing in agony and see me in Intensive Care after my op and many other unpleasant scenes in between. I was high on morphine through most of it and besides, I had many many hours staring out the window to come to terms with it all and a lovely nurse to talk it over with. Tammy didn't have that luxury and I firmly believe Next of Kin should be offered counselling in such instances. All Tammy got was everyone telling her to 'be strong' every 5 minutes. Not once did anyone sit her down and say 'are you OK? are you coping alright? do you want to talk about it?' Today I went to our GP about my headache: just mildly concerned, never ever had headaches before my SAH and it's my first proper headache since coming home so I have no frame of reference apart from the SAH itself! GP confirmed I'm absolutely fine, no need to worry etc. I took Tammy along with me, mainly so she could hear from my doctor directly that I'm OK. GP had a good chat with T about how she felt. T may be in shock. Lots of denial about what happened, just brushing it under the carpet and bottling all her emotions up, perhaps in the hopes that forgetting it all will make it never have happened. She even refuses to come this forum now! Also sleeping badly (on Nytol to help) and having awful dreams. Our GP said it'd be best for T to speak with the fine folks at Headway (they have a place just by North Hants Hospital) and if that doesn't help she's to go back to the GP for further help as she may have PTSD. I had made a previous appointment with Headway for both Tammy and I to go talk to a counsellor there but T decided to not go just a few days before the appointment. I think my GP has persuaded her to keep the next appointment though. I really hope so. She's more upset about the SAH than I am and I can see exactly why. T had tears on the way home (fianlly!) and I think we may be getting somewhere now. As our GP put it "you very nearly lost your partner: if you had lost him, you'd naturally be grieving. You didn't lose him but it was a close thing, so you're very close to grieving and you have a lot of emotions that you don't know how to deal with because what happened was a significantly rare thing. No-one will think any less of you for being upset about all this, it's quite natural."

Hi Shiree, Reading your story was enlightening. I feel exactly the same way about my own recovery: want to get back to normal ASAP. If I'm honest I think I just want to forget the whole episode and move on! Today I've got my first major headache since coming out of hospital. An unpleasant although possibly necessary reminder that I may need to slow down just a bit. It's good to see reminders that it does get better, thanks!

David Tennant? Good grief. Oh, you're just being nice Since Tammy attacked the rest of my head with the old clippers last night, I look more like Christopher Ecclestone than David Tennant

Hi Scott, You're right, we ARE very lucky to get Wessex Neuro! Whilst I was there the junior doctors kept telling me it's the best place in the country, bless their cotton socks We'll have to meet up for coffee and a natter sometime soon, provided you can put up with Tammy going on about Saints FC Hi Julie, Happy to help! Meant what I said, don't make yourself be alone. So many fine folks here to talk to if you're feeling down! Right, sun is just coming out so it's time for a spot of gardening, methinks. I'll probably end up wasting time taking pictures of next-doors blossom which is bursting out all over but hey, that's what spring is for

Awww no! I've only been here five minutes and I'm in trouble already!

Hi Julie, You'll be in safe hands when you get to Wessex Neuro. You may well be in the care of Mr Sparrow, genius consultant neuro surgeon, if so tell him I said hello and that his handiwork is still holding up just fine! Really you have much less to worry about than you think, Julie. It's amazing the amount of bad thoughts that build up before any sort of op. It's also mildly annoying when so many people who don't know what it's like tell you to think positive, but I'm allowed to say that so I will! What no-one tells you is that thinking positive is a knack that just happens after a while if you let it, you can't make it happen. Give it time and you'll feel a lot better If you want to share your bad thoughts privately then do PM me. I've only just had the same op as you (except they didn't even try coiling my anuerysm as it's so small!) and it's all very fresh in my mind, so I reckon I have a fair idea of what you're worrying about. Just remember one thing, don't make yourself be alone

Hi all! Wow, thanks for the replies full of good advice! Luckily, my job is part-time anyway and my bosses have been extremely supportive. I just know they'll be fussing round me for a good while yet, bless them, although I shall be cross if they've put comfy cushions in the works van! I'll try and get Tammy to register here so she can chat with you guys as well. Thanks! My blog can be found HERE. That's the first post about my problems, further posts are easy enough to find via the newer entires button. Remember, it can be perhaps a tad saucy but it's all meant in fun so please don't take offence. TTFN Neil.

Looks like I've joined a club with quite a significant membership! My fiancee, bless her, is still not keen to start having sex again, which I understand perfectly. She was very scared by my SAH and 4 weeks in hospital. She's is still in shock to a certain extent although is getting better. Me, I'm ready, willing and able but also happy to wait. All the doctors, nurses, ambulance techs etc found it quite amusing when I told them my SAH happened immediately after sex with my fiancee. Only one doctor actually had the courage to tell me, upon discharge from hospital, that sexual relations could be started again as soon as I liked but for goodness sake, if I must do it in a hot bath I should at least go on top.

I got quite fed up with having to down 3 litres of water a day in hospital. Once I collared a doctor and asked if it had to be water. He told me quite bluntly: 'it could be any fluid, even beer (but not spirits) if you like so long as it doesn't interfere with your medication. Oh, and avoid caffiene if possible'. So, now I'm at home I have a wide variety of drinks, including the odd bottle of decent ale of an evening, and I easily top my 3 litres a day and have only very rare headaches (touch wood!). I guess everyone is different and you just need to find out what works for you. I can't tell you how happy I am that beer works for me

Hi all, I'm Neil from Tadley (near Basingstoke) and I'm glad I found this site. I hope my experiences can help others who might be feeling scared and alone. It would also help me as someties I still feel a little bit scared and lonely myself, although it's getting easier every day. I had a SAH on the evening of 9th Feb '09, as diagnosed by CT scan at Basingstoke North Hampshire hospital. I was transferred the next day to Wessex Neurological Unit in Southampton. I was discharged from Wessex Neuro just a week later after an angiogram revealed nothing but a healthy brain. Doctors opinion was that whatever had caused the bleed had also destroyed itself during the event and that I was in no further danger, I just needed to rest up for a few weeks to get my energy levels back to normal. After about half an hour at home I was rushed to North Hants hospital in Basingstoke, showing lots of similar symptoms as when I had my first bleed, although not as serious. They made me feel better, told me my medication was insufficient, prescribed oral morphine to take care of the pain and sent me home the next day. Spent about 24 hours at home then same again, got rushed back to North Hants hospital! I was in agony. I was constantly vomiting and couldn't bear any noise: a chair scraping on the floor sent me into floods of tears because it felt like a drill in my brain! They consulted carefully with Wessex Neuro and gave me a lumbar puncture to get spinal fluid samples. That also released a lot of pressure on my brain and I felt sooooo much better afterwards. I stopped being sick and had no aversion to noise, light or anything afterwards. I felt fine again, although very shaky on my feet and was made to stay lying down all the time just in case something else was wrong and needed treating. Eventually I was sent back to Wessex Neuro as no-one wanted to let me go again until they knew what had caused my relapses. There I had two more angiograms and they finally found a really tiny aneurysm at the front of my brain. Apparently it looked just like an odd-shaped blood-vessel and took a lot of discussion with some very senior consultants to decide what it actually was. Due to the size and location of the aneurysm, they operated to open my skull up and clip the aneurysm rather than coiling it. The operation took 7 hours instead of the usual 2 or 3 hours. I'm now at home, almost completely back to normal apart from a slightly swollen head, strange clicking noises from the muscles around my face that were ut and stitched during surgery and a noticable lack of energy, all of which are evaporating gradually day by day. Indeed, I had the most terrifically good news yesterday: I went to see my GP who has now received all info from Wessex Neuro regarding my condition. He has declared me almost fit to return to work, and has signed me off until just the 14th of April! Counting down the days now! My fiancee are also counting down the days to our wedding in July this year! We're looking forward to it so much and are both so grateful I survived. I've been incredibly lucky with my grade 1 SAH. It could have been so much worse. I've had great support from friends and family, even my boss, although none of them with the best will in the world could understand what emotions have been rattling through my head. There have been times when I've cried like a baby for no apparent reason and other times when I've been floating on cloud nine, again for no apparent reason. I alone knew why I was crying or smiling. My emotions have settled down now, though. I've started getting the garden ready for seeding (I love to grow my own veg!) and in a few days I shall start swimming again, as there's a pool just down the road from home. Already I stroll to the newsagent on my own (only 10 minutes away) and do the chores at home whilst my fiancee is at work. We joke that I'd now make a better housewife than her. The saddest and most frustrating thing is, my fiancee had little or no support throughout the whole thing. I've had lots of people talk with me about everything, explaining the risks, making sure I knew exactly what to expect, helping me deal with my emotions a little bit etc. My poor fiancee just kept being told to be strong for me, but no-one offered to help her deal with her emotions. The only information/help she got was from me, but thanks to the morphine and nimodipine I didn't make a great deal of sense. She's hopefully going to see a counsellor soon who might help her unbottle everything that she stored up over the last few weeks. I know she was scared to hell, thinking she might lose me at any moment. My prognosis is now excellent and she's a lot less worried, but she's still not back to her old self just yet. If anyone would like to know more so as to better come to terms with their own experiences, just contact me. I can spare all the time in the world to help. Also, to keep my friends informed, I kept my blog up-to-date throughout my stay(s) in hospital. I hesitate to post a link as I don't want to break the rules by advertising my own website (although it is only a blog). Also I can be somewhat bawdy, rabelaisian on my blog quite a lot of the time. Moderators, is it OK if folks PM me if they want to read my blog? Not sure how you prefer to work it here