Pressure

[ninja]

Hi All

Haven't been on for awhile, just a quick one. I am now 15 months post coiling and I think I'm doing quite well and have started to socialise but I find if I am put under pressure to go out I feel as if I would rather stay in. I have just been invited to a do tonight and because everybody is on at me to go I'd rather do my own thing and stay in or just go for a quiet drink in the country which I am doing. This is unusual for me as I was rather outgoing and confident well I had to be in the job I was doing. Never mind I hope you are all enjoying the weather but doesn't the sun bring on the headaches, OK I know I should wear a hat.

Keep Believing

John

[Karen]

Hi John,

Lovely to hear from you....

I think that it's quite common to lose a bit of confidence after a SAH and it takes time to re-build it. You can only do things at your own pace and what feels comfortable for you.....well, that's what I do anyway and even at 19 months post SAH, I still have a fair way to go.

I think that us females tend to talk about feelings/problems a lot more and most of my family and friends understand that I have lost confidence and that there are still things in my life that I can't do at the minute. For me personally, I have physical problems that hold me back and the severity of these vary from day to day and can affect my confidence when I'm trying to get out and about. I try to take each day as it comes and don't plan things in advance unless it's absolutely necessary.

Hope that you are keeping well.....

[Joan]

John - most of the people on the site will tell you I am no shrinking violet (how could I be, being originally a New Yorker) but like you, I find post-SAH I go to great lengths to avoid a lot of social encounters unless they are (a) small and ( people who are old, old friends. I think this is related to a loss of confidence which I didn't notice so much as my partner did after we watched a DVD about SAH. Joan