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dealing with my husband


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My husband had a SAH in January. Physically he has returned to normal and has gone back to work and since his SAH he has shown no overt changes in personality. For the past week, he has been - lets say - awkward! He barely talks to me, goes in to any room that I am not in, but can't tell me what is wrong! Whatever I do is wrong. He is absolutely fine with everyone else and would prefer to be at work than at home. I hadn't expected any changes to show this far down the line. I have suggested it is a response to his SAH. Any ideas?

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Hi there. Good to hear from you and sorry to hear about your husband but it is promising he's doing well physically.

I would guess that maybe he is struggling with the effects of the SAH that they don't neccessarily warn you about, tiredness, tingling, continued pain. That combined with being back at work he may be struggling a bit and doesn't want to burden or panic anyone further....

I often felt i don't want to add any more drama to the family so I know I have avoided and kept quiet in the past, I'm getting better now at sharing but in the early days I defnately hid how unwell I still was, from myself as well as others.

Perhaps you could talk to him and tell him that you found this site and read how hard people have find going back to work after SAH, there a huge thread n here about that on here. And it's true, it is. I am only just starting back next week after 14 months out and will only be doing a few hours and that's going to be hard so if he's full time back after 3 months then others who have done similar to him will attest that his brain is probably complaining loudly .

Others will offer better advice but great that you're here. Don't push him though, let him know you're worried. Is there anyone else he will talk to? A friend? GP ?Might be worth suggesting.

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Hi Val,

I agree with Daff, I was always singing when I came around, now I drive them crazy with my singing.

Have another go at talking to him, never give up.

Our loved ones go through it also and I realise what I put my family through when my daughter squeezed my

shoulder and said welcome home Mum. We both cried and finished up with red eyes.

We all need a release so talk to him or show him post. ?? You must feel awful xx Don't though he just needs

thinking time.

Wishing you both well.

WinB143 xx

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