phil13

Sharon was 43 when she has hers, and she was always on the go. I've heard of someone having an SAH at the age of 16 but didn't survive - that is scary. My brother's son, Jackson, had a 'brain bleed' when he was born premature - he's six year old now and was given the same prognosis as Sharon so it goes to show there is always hope. Sharon is now responding to the left - thanks to Tony's story - a little progress is a big step where she is at the moment. We are going to keep sitting at the left side of her bed to try to get her to look left - information like this is vital so if anyone has any please post it. Thanks again, Phil xxx

You're more than welcome Sara. Take care, Phil xxx

I play guitar, bass, drums, keys, and I sing. On the keys, I'm really just a chord basher with the odd fill because I have to sing at the same time. I think it's known as 'jack of all trades, master of none' or 'cack at all trades, master of mediocrity'!! Phil xxx

Hi Sara, It must be very, very difficult not be able to play at the moment, I'm a music teacher and only really get a chance to play when I'm gigging with the band, and I find that very frustrating. Maybe, when you feel a little better you might try an electro/acoustic violin with just the frame - the sound won't be loud at all and it'll keep your technique going. Just a thought... Take care... Phil xxx

Hi Sara, Welcome to the site of all sites. Take care, the people are lovely here and will help you through. Phil xxx

Hi Jackie, Welcome to the site - I've only been here just over a week and I've found it most supportive and informative. And the people are lovely. Take care, you've found a great place. Phil xxx

Hi Dawn, Welcome to the fold, I can imagine your very anxious indeed. Keep positive though; they discovered Sharon's sister's aneurysm and treated it quickly. Take care, Phil xxx

Hi Tony, What a story! It's a great incite into just how much an SAH can affect somebody so much. Since reading it I've been getting Sharon to look to the left - she did for a couple of nights although tonight she wouldn't, stubborn or what! I do believe that Sharon, like yourself, will only see a complete blur without definition, so I'll continue to try and get her to look left. Anything like this is invaluable to her. Thanks so much Tony, and what a recovery!! Phil xxx

The Isle of Whithorn is on the South West Coast of Scotland between Dumfries and Stranraer; it is a fishing harbour and the most tranquil place me and Sharon have visited. We used to go there every couple of months just to chill out - the first time we got our camper we parked up on the pier and watched the moon light up the sea. There's an inn called called the Steam Packet Inn which is where we used to stay. Gorgeous food, very friendly staff, and a house South African red that blows your head off!! I fell off my stool in the bar one night when we were drinking with the locals. Phil

Well, I'll add mine to this, I am a course leader/music lecturer. Sharon was treasurer for the local WEA branch, she had her SAH at a meeting. She was also doing courses in IT, building, plastering, and woodwork. Phil XXX

Sharon used to have these marvellous 'on the spur of moment' ideas like 'Let's drive up to Scotland in our camper! at 10.00pm at night?! For the first half an hour of the journey I'd be clenching my teeth, then it would turn into one of our wonderful adventures - driving through picturesque villages at 3.00am in the morning. Saying that, one day I had the bright idea of driving across to South West Scotland to look for the Wicker Man!! We didn't find it but found a lovley place called Ilse of Whithorn which became our usual 'getaway from it all' place. So maybe we are both 'headless chickens' like you Karen. Phil xxx

Sharon's hair on her right side is a different in texture to the left, although there is no bone flap there and it's just a recess, there hasn't been any thinning. The recess does cause concern when her hair is being washed but there hasn't been any problems so far. Only recently the hairdresser put a colour on her hair which was a bit of an ordeal - I had to hold Sharon's head while she balanced a dish to rinse it, resulting in quite a bit of water everywhere. Sharon was wondering what the hell was going on, bless her, but she looks ten times better. Phil

Karen/Keith, At Christmas, the nursing home have Christmas Carol singing, which this time the head nurse Minimol contributed a song from India. She was telling me that, unfortunately, Sharon threw up in the middle of it, to which I replied, 'Do you think it was the quality of the singing?' I received a slap across the arm... Phil xxx

Hello Michael, Sorry to hear about your cousin - you, your cousin and family will be in my prayers. Phil xxx

Spot on there, Karen. I think you either see the funny side or you go insane! Unfortunately, some people can't appreciate what I would term as 'gallows' humour. I was telling a friend of mine about Sharon's progress and he caught me completely off guard with, 'Oh, I think she deserves a good slap lying there all day getting off 'scot' free!'. I nearly burst my sides laughing!! She would too. Laughter is good for the soul... Phil xxx

Cal, I think you can't really stop a person's natural personality from resuming to some extent, but I'm sure Jim is aware that he can't be on the go as much as he used to. Sharon was too prone to getting stressed about things which was down to how much she had her 'plate'; too much. I hope you are both keeping well. Phil xxx

I do think that sometimes this kind of humour is a defense mechanism. But speaking as the 'other half' of someone who has had an SAH, I've found that whenever I hear of someone complaining of regular headaches, I tend to become very, very concerned, and without causing a panic, steer them towards asking their doctor for a scan. This may be over-reaction on my part in view of what happened to Sharon, but if it helps someone then so be it. Phil xxx

I'm sorry Karen, but Sharon would be p*****g herself laughing at this part - it was just her personality! I'll go now...sorry. You really have really been through the mill, and your husband - I really can't imagine the struggle you've both had. My heart goes out to you. Sorry, for my sense of humour ...and Sharon's. Take care. Phil xxx

I've had a bit Laura...it helps sometimes. Take care... Phil xxx

Thanks Cal, Everything I've heard since about other people and Sharon, unfortunately, it forms a pattern - well, in women, especially. Always on the go, will do anything for anybody; doesn't know quite when to stop and relax. Was Jim this way before SAH? Anybody else? I'm on the go by nature - high metabolism, greyhound variety, slightly concerned in view of what's happened to Sharon, and everyone else - Karen, you've had two 'annies' - ****** hell! - were you... do you race around? Food for thought... Phil xxxx

Hi Cal, It does seem quite insensitive of Jim's boss to ask him to work up the ladder in view of his SAH - and from what you've said his boss comes across quite cold and callous. It's not like Jim's been off work with a broken arm!! Mind you, my brother went back to work ASAP after a liver transplant - I sometimes wonder whether it was because he feared he would be replaced. Maybe his boss needs to be filled in on exactly what an SAH is, and the complications that can manifest during recovery. You are both in my thoughts... Phil xxx

Thanks Laura, Minimol, the head nurse, is going to ask the Stroke Rehab Unit if they will send a physiotherapist to work on Sharon. I pretty much know what the answer will be, so we will have to pay for a private one. I do think that it is a funding issue and the resources are directed towards patients who they see as 'having potential'. The definition 'having potential' would seem suggest they look for patients who are able to fully engage. I dread to think how many people are left to stare at the wall. My brother and his wife's son, Jackson, was born premature and suffered a hemorrhage and they were told 'no chance'. They live in Australia where it is private health care, so it cost them thousands to have Jackson treated. But he is now six years old, has a problem with his left hand and can't run as fast as the other kids, but he is a happy, bright child. This is in contrast to one of the other babies at the time who suffered mild brain damage - they said he might have the odd problem - the poor soul is permanently disabled and needs total assistance. It is back to the brain being one of the most complex and amazing organisms and the outcomes the doctors predict are based on visual x-rays but they seem to be unable to state what the brain may or may not do. One of Sharon's friends, Donna, was in a car crash and suffered multiple brain injuries which resulted in her being diagnosed as 'vegetative'. Of course, her parents were told they would be visiting her for the rest of their lives. It took ten years for Donna to get back to normal life but you wouldn't believe she has brain damage. Stories like these give people great hope even though the outcome for Sharon is uncertain and depends on too many unknown factors. But she's more than worth it. That's the end of my rant. Take care, Phil xxx

Thank you Tina, it is truly wonderful to feel supported and amongst so many caring and thoughtful people. It really has lifted me and made me feel so much more motivated and positive. Phil xxx

Thanks Karen, yes she not only has a mischievous twinkle in her eye, but also one the loudest, guffawing laughs I've ever encountered. We once had to go to the hospital about fertility - I won't go into details - but I arrived from work and she was already in with doctor and I heard her laughing down the corridor! The doctor was advising us to try harder in order to have a baby and Sharon was in her element saying things like 'Don't worry we'll get it in hand!' and shrieking with laughter. The doctor wasn't amused but his assistant was choking!! Thanks again. Phil xxx

Thank you Keith. I've rummaged around looking for a picture of Sharon; unfortunately the best ones are hard copy pictures but I've got this one which I edited.Sharon.JPG[/attachment:224x2qza] Yes, I'm taking it easy this weekend - yesterday was a long haul trip with quite a few traffic jams! Speak to you soon. Phil