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What healing did you discover this year?

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Hi all,


I was thinking about this as 2015 begins.  What healing have I noticed this year.


I've noticed:


My legs feel mostly normal again 

My pains have gradually shifted and some subsided

My crying can be squelched by my thinking better and the triggers are way fewer

I am practicing up for an audition and feeling like I can do it

My stamina has really improved over the last few months

My ADD-like mind has become more focused at times

I can go for long walks or bike rides now >40min which was my max for last year



What about all of you?  Think back to last January, I was surprised when I actually spent the time.


Happy Recovery for 2015 and beyond!



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Hi Kris,


I am absolutely delighted for you! Progress is a wonderful thing and, when you put it in the terms everyone can easily understand, it can only provide inspiration for the rest of us!


Whether people have progressed as much as you, or have achieved less, progress is progress and we should applaud it all!  Everyone goes at different rates and has their own path to follow and hopefully we will all aspire to be 100% well again.


I look at it like this - if I can't be first I want to be second, if I can't be second I want to be third and so on.  All I do want people to know is that I am doing my best and giving it my all, because I can't do any more.


Progress, any progress, with love and support from those around us, is success.  I have a somewhat competitive nature at times, but I realise that for others life isn't about competition, it's about living the life they want and choose, and if something like a SAH comes in between those goals, then getting as near to it as they can is all they, and the rest of us, can ask.


Sometimes we may have to re-adjust our goals, but there are some who are not in a position to be able to do so, therefore I count my blessings.


Me, I took early retirement, my short term memory is improving although still not perfect and I still suffer fatigue which is now regulated by daily growth hormone injections that I now have to take for life.  Still, life is generally good and I am truly thankful for that!


Once again, I am delighted you are on the up and I look forward to more updates from you - well done Kris, superb stuff.  Good luck with the cycling, walking and of course the audition!



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Wow!  Both of you made such great points.  I am so grateful that you, Kris, have made such progress this year.  So much progress that you seemed to have stopped in your tracks, recognized it, became grateful for it, and then shared it with BTG.  It's fantastic!  I also love a couple of things in relation to your post.  A)  I love gamey type things where I am challenged to stop, think, note, and share what's going on in my head on any subject.   B)  Any time someone says to me that they would like to hear from me on a particular subject - HOORAY! As most of you have probably noticed I LOVE to share my thoughts, rant, and write....lol.  


Macca, I've already mentioned to you that I find you truly amazing in your responses.  Perfecto!  So glad your short term is improving.  Wondering how growth hormone injections help in fatigue.  Will look that up.  


Me, I was just approved for Social Security Disability.  What a major hurdle that was!  It will save us in relation to food, shelter, etc.  It's kind of like early retirement, Macca.  I can actually retire on my birthday this year at age 62, but at lesser rate.  SSD approval provides me retirement-like benefits but at the rate I would be getting if I work until I am 65.  Yee-hah.  Health-wise...I don't know.  I can say that my head where all of the surgery took place and the shunt site seems to be healing noticeably...finally.


 My headache is better most of the time.  I'm sleeping better thanks to new medication and am having my phenblahblahwhatever! seizure medicine changed to another so happy about that.  I read a whole book this week and can actually tell you about it!  My hair is growing out.  The memory...yikes.  I feel it is not as good as immediately after sah but am getting better at pointing at things I'm trying to talk about.  lol.


All in all, it was a very shaky year but I am grateful to be here with my family and to have met all of you at BTG.  Somehow - and I truly think this is because of where my sah happened - my feelings of love, empathy, sympathy, etc. for people is through the roof.  I want to help and save everybody that is suffering.  It makes me happy to feel like that.  I was saved for something and I think that is it.


In summary, congrats Kris on your progress and thanks for starting this dialogue!  Good luck with your memory and fatigue, Macca.  Please continue to share on the site as you are loved.  I am better than I was in June and am positive I will be even better next New Year's.  


Sorry I rave so much.  It's been a life-long problem.  LOL


Love, Carolynusa

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Hi Carolyn,


When they coiled me, my pituitary gland was damaged and it stopped producing growth hormone naturally.  That's why I was prescribed and now have injections, as failure to have it causes fatigue and therefore seriously impedes quality of life.  With it I am much better and continue albeit slowly, to make progress!  It works for me. Hope that explains it enough for you!


I had two years of tests before they gave it to me - it's not something you can get off the shelf in the UK - and it needs to be used under supervision of the hospital!


I hope you are well!



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Hey Macca!  Aha!  I get it now.  I'm so glad it is working for you.  When I did health insurance I recall that Growth Hormone Therapy was a huge deal as it was so expensive and somewhat experimental at the time.  I had to fight and fight for some of my people in order to get that covered.  The other reason it was difficult to get approved is that it so often used for something other than Growth problems so insurance companies would become suspicious and try not to pay.  Grrrrr  (I was a "payer"..lol)


I have been feeling pretty good the last couple of days...thanks for the thoughts.  Take care and toss us a post now and then.


Love, Carolynusa

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Hi Kris
Thanks for this, it's a good exercise to see the changes in a year and thinking back to last January was a good thing as I hit a recovery wall this time last year and was finding things pretty hard...a year on and things are so much better with me.

My healing in the last year really seemed to improve once I had reached acceptance to a certain extent of how much has changed that I just have no control over and I really seem to be at peace with that most of the time and have less grief for the activity and lifestyle I lost with my sah so maybe that's not physical healing but emotional and at the same time I have found much more contentment in the day to day living and enjoying the small things that make me smile.

I can do so much more now, like you Kris my stamina has improved mentally and physically in the past year but I still have to pace myself and watch for over stimulation.
My emotions are less likely to surface as often as they did but equally I don't bottle things up now, it gets aired be it through words or tears ( or a song!) and then I move on so I have the gift of my sah which means I no longer dwell on things as they are forgotten quickly ;)
I achieved some of my post sah goals like flying for the first time and have new goals for 2015.

My happy days Are those when I am in a steady state, one where head pain is tolerable, balance is good and stamina is regular , that's a good day and I can smile at the end of it and when it's not I know now that it will pass.

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I think I just lost all I wrote.  Ugh.  Anyway, I have healed both emotionally and physically.  I still have my down days and cry for nothing at times.  I am still learning my limits and learning to say NO.


Most importantly, I am stronger than I ever thought possible.  I have also learned compassion.   I am also learning to be comfortable with me and that is an emotional and physical process that is on-going.



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Hi Iola,


You sound a lot calmer these days and like using that little word 'No' seems to have had a big, positive effect on your life.  Down days are natural and nothing to be unduly worried about - I still have them now and again - but you come through them!


Learning to be comfortable with yourself is a big thing in healing after SAH - well done you for getting there.  You seem to have made so much progress since you first joined this site.


Well done, I am extremely happy for you - and for your family, who must now be seeing more of the real you again, which is absolutely first class!


Magical stuff!



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