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Shells story


paul4shell
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On July the Ist whilst helping my son move house in a different county Michele, my partner of 19 years had an Aneurysm whilst working in the garden. Thank god my 16yr old son was home. If he had not found her she would have died. She was taken to the local hospital by ambulance and had a scan where they decided to send her to frenchay in bristol. It was then found that she also had SAH. She was coiled the next day but later that evening she developed Hydrocephalus and had to have an EVD put in. This then got infected as i was warned it may and due to her very confused state she had to be restrained in the bed for her own protection. After 4 days the drain stopped working and had to be moved to the other side of her head. She had the drains in for 15 days in total. After 21 days of antibiotics it was decided to give her a lumber puncture to check pressure and if there was still an infection in the CSF, that was probably the second hardest thing i've ever had to be part of the first being seeing michele there in body but not in spirit. The pain she was going through with no real understanding of why, not being able to protect her, take any of the pain for her was all that i could bare. I'm a 41 yr old man and i've lost count of how many times i've cried like a 2 year old in the last 5 weeks. She was discharged 5 weeks later but is still getting headaches, is very confused and has no short term memory to mention. I never realised how much i rely on her emotionaly till i nearly lost her but then i suppose thats the way with most people. I know its going to be a long slow recovery but she's a fighter and i will help her in whatever way i can. Not because i'm the worlds most caring man but in my opinion becuase i'm selfish and i want her back.

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Hi Paul

A warm welcome to BTG thank you for sharing yours and Michele's story with us. Its good to hear that Michele is home now but recovery can be 1step forward and several back in the first few months.

The headaches, confusion and short term memory problems will get better in time. Michele needs to get as much rest as she can and plenty of fluids which can help with the headaches.

Wishing Michele all the best in her recovery but remember you need to look after yourself as well. Please let us know how Michele gets on.

Take Care

Janet x

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Hi Paul :-D A very warm welcome to you and michele....you both have had a very tough time.......Janet has given sound advice and it really is rest rest rest... Take care and look forward to hearing more from you soon.

Love Tina xx

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Hi paul sorry to hear about michelle. My wife too had an sah had 2 anuerysmn one coiled and one clipped came home went back with hydracephalus and had a shunt fitted then got an infection in the wound, had no short term memory wobbly on her feet headaches, speech changed every day and many more things but now 41/2 months down the line she's doing well, nothing happens fast and it's not all steps forward but we are getting there as i'm sure youboth will, and me cried all the time, don't it make you feel better for a while.Good luck to you both Rod

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hi paul

welcome to btg your not alone i have cried many times since lin collapsed last year and im still blubbing and im well over fifty i wish michelle well and i have my fingers crossed for you both i will pm my number if you want to call and have a rant feel free to do so us fellas who dont show too many feeling get hit the hardest take care wish chelle best wishs

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Guest ElaineW

Hello and welcome, my mum had her SAH May last year and your story so far has been very much deja vu but your wife has done the hardest part to come through it. My mum too is also left with the same problems, memory being the biggest problem of all but the long and short of it is the outcome could have been much worse as it has been for many others. My mum too spend two months at Frenchay Hospital. I think when you come so close to losing someone you love in circumstances such as this it is very traumatic and can be very hard to come to terms with. My advice to you is take each day as it comes and be prepared for the downs as well as the ups (no 2 days I found were often the same). Take care both of you and my very best wishes to your wife for her recovery.

Elaine

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Thanks all for your replies. I know it may seem selfish but it does make things feel a little easier when you hear about people that are coping. I am very happy that she is still with me and that we now have a chance to make things better than they were before. After coming this close to losing her i realise all to clearly that we really do get one chance at living the life you want or in our case 2 chances, i am not going to make the same mistakes again.

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Hi Paul

Welcome to BTG and so sorry tohear about Micheller but glad that she's making good progress.

Yes, it helps a great deal to know that there are others going through the same thing from both sides of the coin.

Sending you both hugs and best wishes

Take care

Love Sami xx

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Hello Paul, and of course Hello Michelle too:-D Of course you will help Paul and it doesn't matter why! Just be there for Michelle and she will then know you need her which will help no end believe me. It's mostly long, slow and sometimes frustrating but we can share our joys and worries which is brilliant!

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