kateg Posted January 9, 2012 Author Share Posted January 9, 2012 Oh Louise that made me chuckle I really don't know how mum would cope if she was told, she keeps saying she wants to die on bad days, I'm never getting any better I may as well be dead I am hoping the anti-depressants will help with this... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KelBel Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 HI Welcome to BTG. Sorry to hear about your mum. I do hope the anti-depressants start to help her, and that Headway will be able to offer some support for you all, and help her continue to recover. Do you or your stepdad keep a diary of how your mum is doing? Or can you? You can then read back and remind her of what she could or could not do straight after the stroke and what she can do today. This might help to reaffirm that she has moved on and is recovering, albeit very slowly. It is a long-slow recovery but there is almost always some recovery to be made over time, even if it is just acceptance, that in itself is a huge recovery. We all try to learn to compare ourselves to how we were when we came out of hospital to how we are now. Not compare ourselves now to how we were before we were ill. Let us know how she gets on. Take care Kel x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Oh! I hope they help too there IS nothing worse than those low black day, maybe it wouldnt be a good thing after all....... maybe on those black days pointing out just how far she has come maybe your Mum dosnt realise it, I know I didnt with stuff I was amazed when I thought about it.... Think that's what Im trying to explain Kel..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Winb143 Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 I know we are all different....but if poss do not give up on Mum ....I know it's hard on family..but never give up Keep Happy and singing ..go get em... and prove them wrong xxxx...I wrote help me on a pad it made my family know I was still here.....scrawley writing etc but I needed them Love to you all Winb143 xxxxxxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kateg Posted January 10, 2012 Author Share Posted January 10, 2012 Oh I would never give up on her I love her too much. It is really hard for us but especially for my step-dad when she keeps complaining all day and saying she wishes she was dead He copes with so much that we don't really see not living with her 24/7 but sometimes I know it gets too much and then he will ring me and let off steam! I am hoping the anti-depressants will help with this and will lift her a bit..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SarahLou Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 Hi Kate, It must be so so tough for the family and loved ones to go through all this. Seeing the frustration there but not being able to ease any pains or worries. I know first hand how that feels. It's a feeling that rips at your soul, it's heart breaking. Your step dad is lucky to have you there for him to let off steam and vent things. Is there any proffesional help you could get? Please don't take this the wrong way but if you're there for your step dad who is there for you? You say how other family members are but how are you Kate?? We are all here for you,please remember that. As for your mum saying she wants to die, well, I know that feeling, got very down myself and felt the same way, but I found the strength to fight and I'm sure your mum will too. Take each day as it comes. Big hugs to you dear Kate. Take care, SarahLou Xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Mario Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 As for your mum saying she wants to die, well, I know that feeling, got very down myself and felt the same way, but I found the strength to fight and I'm sure your mum will too. Take each day as it comes. Yes I remember feeling as if I wanted to die as well and voicing it. In fact I used to say to hubby "Why didn't you let me die, you should have told them to leave me and let me go." Part and parcel of recovery is depression in many cases. Be positive, your mum will pull through this with the help of the antidepressants and the support of a loving family which she has obviously got. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kateg Posted January 11, 2012 Author Share Posted January 11, 2012 Thank you again for sharing your experiences, it really helps to know that what mum is going through is 'normal'. SarahLou I am fine, I do cry sometimes but I have a wonderful husband and 3 lovely adult sons who are all very supportive and love their nan almost as much as I do We also have my sister who has a lovely hubby and family so there are plenty of us supporting each other for which I feel very blessed as I know not all families are as close. Penny we are hoping very much that the new meds will help with mum's mindset, she only started about a week ago and I think they take between 2 and 4 weeks to start taking effect. They arrive in Spain today and have I think 2 nights en route before they arrive at the apartment they are staying in till mid April, I am hoping to hear from my step-dad then and hoping they had a good journey, at least the shipping forecast for the Bay of Biscay was good It will be good to visit them in March and see how things are - new meds and hopefully plenty of sunshine should improve things for both of them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Winb143 Posted January 26, 2012 Share Posted January 26, 2012 Nicee reply Danny.............I found songs helped me ....memory wise and happiness...... Love WinB143 x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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