MaryB

That is so wonderful Alison. Good luck with your future together. Onward and upwards! BIG HUG for you! Mary

Welcome Mike, This site has been the most helpful to me. Know you will get better everyday, patience...... This has given me patience.......

Hi Karen, Love the site. It saves me, no changes needed. I am from Indiana, USA.

Hi Lisa, I understand that feeling. I have a feelign of not really giving a about anybody (even my family) at times unless it is searious. I am different but I look fine. Clients at work tell me all the time I look "normal". Funny, I jsut think it is part of having gone through a life changing event. I think in our lives we have several 3-6 life changing events in our lifetime. It is a time to pause, reflex and learn- it has changed who you are and now you feel different. I am still somewhat unemontional about it all but at the same time i lack the passion I once had, maybe not enough energy yet. It is strange but I am different in many ways than i was before so I am going to take this as a wonderful life lesson.

Lizzy, Love the line about GUILT most of my friends and family are Catholic. I do not feel any guilt what so ever for sleeping so much. I look at it is getting well. Like a baby sleeps much when it grows I use the phrase in my head "I sleep much to get well". I can't change it and I refuse to let myself feel bad about it. I am forunate that my husband is so supportive. I sometimes feel self centered in my thoughts because I must be right now. If I do nto take care of myself what good am I to anyone else. It all comes into light for me. Rest, water, and a little something else! It gets much better,really but it will take time. Oh, and I can drink - I won't drink if I have taken pain and muscle relaxers but I can drink beer. Gin is a little too much for me yet! But I can down up to 4 beers at a sitting. Guess I woul dbe bragging now! LOL, MaryB

Hi Lizzy, In my early days I was sleeping for 3-6 hours a day on the couch and sleeping well at night. I am a headache sufferer as well. I am 5 1/2 months post SAH. I slept yesterday for 3 hours on my day off. Do you have kids, job etc? I am 53 kids are gone, just hubby and me. I work and that has been hard enough. The spoon therory (SP) is great, I use to say I have a 1/2 cup of beans and I can only use 1/4 at work and 1/4 at home to find some balance. I still over do it. But I NEVER feel bad about taking a nap or laying down when I need to as it is all I can do to deal with headaches. Nothing really helps me except not pushing too hard, drinking water, and rest. I also never feel bad telling people I have had a brain hemorrahge when I need help. I am not ashamed and somedays I need help from a stranger figuring out something in the grocery store etc.... The more tired I am the more problems I have. Good luck, MaryB

Hi Teechur, I am 5 1/2 months post. Last week I worked my normal week at work without being OCD or having someone recheck me for mistakes. I was pretty proud, it was a busy hectic week but then I was in bed my 3 days off of work with migraine that would not go away. I had not rested as much as I noramally do as I felt I did not need to nap on my lunch hour. I am still finding it hard to balance with improvement. It is a hard act but I have found slow is better than over doing. I think for now I would throw my enegry in walking etc and than resting after that. I have had to listen to those around me to tell me I have done enough as I will often push it when I go to far and pay dearly for it. I always believed if I have the energy on a certain day I ought to use it all up wisely. Not so....I am working on not using everything I have at work and leave nothing for home. But it is hard as I am a natural hard worker. Sound like you are doign great. The one thing this SAH has taught me is patience. It was like God was tapping me on the shoulder for years telling me to slowwwww down and then he hit me with a baseball bat to get my attention! Have a great day! MaryB

One other thing I do now beside massages, rest, water etc..... is I do a yoga simple child pose with stacked fist. If I am at work I just stack my fist and rest my head on them for awhile it takes some tension away. I do not do this often enough. Child's Pose Bring your feet together and your knees apart. Sit back on your feet and lengthen your spine forward as you rest your head either on a yoga block or your two stacked fists. Hold this pose for at least five minutes and concentrate on breathing. Child's pose is considered a very meditative pose. Use this time to express gratitude and slow yourself down. Read more: http://www.livestrong.com/article/362379-yoga-postures-for-hypertension/#ixzz1o3e2KovH

David, I had one true migraine 20 years prior to SAH pain scale 10- (SAH pain scale 100 plus,) now my headaches are usually always there, I wake up with temple side of the head headaches. They get weaker within a hour or so of being up. My other headache is in the back of head - occiptal lobe and brain stem is where my bleeds were. I often feel it hurts my head to lay it down so I have a hard time finding a position to rest. They range for 3-8 as well. My neurosugeon says my head hurts back there becasue of my fibromyalias tender spots but he is wrong. My skull feels brusied at times maybe from not enough rest and water. I had a head massage last weekend and it was wonderful, she just took her fingers in gentle circles all around my head for about 5 mintues.. It was really great. I do not think I have had a headache free day. I do not take pain meds as I was gettign pain med rebound headaches. Good luck I hope this helps, mary PS I have had visual aura or occular migraines for the past 20 years, I kept thinking I would get the headache but it never followed. When I would get tired I would have floaters in my right eye really bad. About 6 months prior to SAh I had a blast of electrical fireworks set off in my right eye for about 10 seconds I was so freaked out. I now have some vision loss in my right eye as well.

Lisa, I am 5 months post NASAH, I am finally doing my normal work week with a nap everyday at noon for a couple of hours. I cannot go without my naps and water. I had not a clue what to expect when I was in the hospital-or when I got home. I thought I would be back to work in a week or 2, it was close to 3 1/2 months. Each week gets a little better, I for some reason never got really depressed as some do. I have fibromylasia and take cymbalta so I do not know if that matters. I know I jsut recently was able to put my case all together, last week was my first appt where I could even think of a good list of questions to ask & felt I could go by myself without my husband. It takes time, much rest, do not rush it, drinks lots of water, stay healthy, and stay upbeat as best you can. I found this place just a couple of months go when googling how long will these headaches last. This place is the best medicine I could of ever been given. Good luck, MaryB

Ok Michelle, I will never ever feel silly again, :biggrin:

Thank you Sue, You certainly have a plate full. I would imagine with cancer surgeries and treatment your body is in a confused state of mind so to speak. One of my best friends has battled cancer and a a long treatment, she is as confused as I am most of the time. I feel silly for even started this post now that I have my scan results and I can read them and put it all together. I see stress is a factor in all of us though. Have a great day , mary

Michelle, I have jsut reread your comment again ( 4th time) and I do not know the answer why - I do not think it is anything more than more information on NASAH. I do not mean to be dense but I just am grasping at any straw that helps me "get it". I am making my own little pamplet! This way I can explain with colored photos & descriptions to my friends and family.

Michelle, I do not think we think it is less damaging or i speak for myself I first inquired about non annies because I was still in the process of figuring out that any of it meant. I just know like the past 2 weeks finally have put it all together. I agree with Nic, I wanted a brain diagram with an X on it and simple words, to explain exactly what happened. I understand we do not know why and never will but for me I was always reading annies and non annies. I was just wondering what us non annies had in common if anything. Damage is damage. It is werid though I was as stressed as I could be when it happened and I had symptoms 6 months prior so I think and believe that while one may of been suddenly happens the ohter bleed of mine was a ticking time clock- more so after reading where it was and what parts it affects. I have a my own personal medical dictionary with words that I needed to know & understand about my scans. This is how I have always processed and studied. I could not prior like a month ago remember "occipital lobe" for the life of me. I just was like "the back of my head". One thing for me is I had 2 bleeds at the same time in different areas and not from aneurysms so I was confused as that I was lead to believe does not normally happen with non annies. My neurosurgeon told me at 3 months that he felt recovery would be similar/ same as surgery recovery. So although I havee been told time and time again I think I finally get it now!! yea!! for me!!! Now I have to lay down as my head is killing me~ Nic, Sorry to hear about your brother. That loss I am sure was very ard and still is. I find that stress is a common thread although my Dr.s say no. m

K I had my follow up Neuro appt. yesterday. I am cleared for 4 months unless something comes up. I am doing well and better than expected. I declined migraine medications becuz of side effects are worse than contast headaches. I do not have to see my neurosurgeon for a year after my mri on 2/21/12. I did get my MRI w& W/O contrast reports and some CT scans from admitting day. Interesting reads. I do not understand when I tell these dr.s that my reading, writing and verbal skills are worse as I always was dyslexic but now it is just awful at times. I also cannot even look at the washing machine when it is agitating. They just took notes but after reading about where my white matter, softnes or degeneration of brain tissue is it explains it all to me. I just do not understand why they cannot just say well your scan says that as well! I however feel better about reading about it because it helps me understand but I am just speechless when it comes to them sharing or maybe they think it wil improve later so they do not want to hold us back. I dont know. m

NASAH in Sept.

Ps I stack my all my paperwork, mail, notes, post its, everything in my pocekts in one giant pile that I tend to go through weekly on my days off. I do always have a ONE pile for everything so I not longer have 16 piles and have to collect things all over the house. Maybe I said those already but I forgot! hahahhaahhahahahahahaha

KEYS! I never can find my keys! I need to & I think I have found a plan on knowing where they are. RIght now they are to stay in my coat pocket that I last wore. I spend a great deal of time looking for my keys. Another thing I cannot be doign a home project that involves say important paper work or such, or stack my mail etc... things I need to take care of and walk away and do it another day. I look as if I have a 1/2 cup of good energy a day and I can only use 1/4 at work and I MUST NOW use the other 1/4 at home. I think it is improving but I dotn use up all my energy at work like I use to. Remind you I have fibro so I have dealt with enegery issues b4. I now am not going to give 100% atwork adn be the hardest worker there. Maybe 2 hardest worker there as someone does more than me ! But I now am training myself to work as slow as the rest of the crew. Which includes their lack of multi tasking which even with SAh I can run circles around them. I have never had patience for the SLOW ones to begin with but I say things now like " she just walked in to the room and told you that! What do you think she said?" " You have asked that same question 5 times already and the answer is still the same" " You better not ask her that because she already told you and she will yell at you" "Do you not listen at all to the intercom?" " what DO you think about all day when you are working?". I find it funny that I beat myself up for being less than 100% and I still can kick butt on most days. I have always worked alone on weekends. I am less educated than 3 of them but of 2 of them they can't do 1/2 of the stuff by themselevs like I can . They lack trouble shooting ablity,. I know we are all built different but geeez............. I don't feel like I am the weak link in the chain anymore.

I have post it notes everywhere but I must write a good note with much information or it means nothing to me. I use to be organized was able to prioriztise (SP) adn on time for everything. I have my normal daily medication in a daily container. Extra meds I should put a post it on it when I took it but I normally do not take but one dose anymore as it tears up my tummy. I no longer allow my self to look at a dozen pair of socks for 15 minutes before i pick a pair out NOW i make myself just grab a pair. The time thing is better but I think my complusiveness about being on time is less after SAH. I have a stack of notes every week I go through and rewrite on a TO DO list of yellw legal paper size,. I never get everything done. I tend to do the mending rather than the mental stuff. I seem to be ocd about cleaning out drawers and containers and sorting the stupid rubber bands & screws, etc. It all is so much better than it was a month ago and a month b4 that. One thing I have going for me was I was allowed to drive rather early on so I wasnt going as stir crazy. I felt like a 16 year old girl grounded with the keys taken from her. I am 5 months post but have not driven to big City like Indianapolis or Chicago yet. Just medium size places of 100,000 people.

I think we all have been short changed as well. But it is not just us. My brother in law had/has cancer cells in his throat 7 months ago- dr said they got it all with biopsy. I was freaking out past 7 months knowing how aggressive you need to be with oral cancer. Well he never heal - went back - now seeing someone else. My sister in law asked if he needed to change his diet or anything. Dr. said no alochol - which was my my big concern all along as he enjoys his bottles of wine. My SIl was upset that she had to ask to get an answer but I read it in my research 7 months ago. Dawn I am in the US so my Dr's are different maybe ? I also have thatpesty little brain tumor that was being followed up on so that is why I was back in neurosuregeons offfice the other day. Although I have a follow up headache appt with neurology on MOnday. I also have fibromyslais and had suffered with neupothy pretty bad a few years back b4 Cymbalta. I use up all my short term memory cells at work and when I get home I become a zombie. I do not think Dr.s know the answers but certainly they can tell you more than just letting us wander around on the internet to find this wonderful site & support system. I think I need a coloring book of the brain and them to show me exactly what happened. I cannot understand it and my surgeon and neurologist disagree I believe. I am going to ask fo rhim to take that brain scupurlture in his office and explain it to me how these seperate events occured. They never ever will admit the symptons I had for 6 months had anythgin to do with any of this but that month prior to my SAh I was so overly stressed and grieving. When my other brother in law was in that horrible tragic pill up accident and the cars caught on fire and he had to leave his greatdaughter burn with the car- she died on impact. My my BIL was a retired fire chief and I think it sucks really bad and is unfair that he had to be put in such a helpless situation. So I always remind myself as well at least that is not myflashback memory. He as well has head trauma and paralazied (SP) verterbes from the accident. Together we speak the same backwards laugage. well I guess that is enough typos for tonight. cold medicine is kicking my butt.

Ryan Phillip, I am impressed that in the hospital you were able to ask such questions! I am 5 months out & just NOW thinking of questions. Cocaine, diet drinks& drugs are one of the leading causes of NASAH- I do not recall them asking me that but by my list of medications & beign 20 #'s overweight I guess they assumed I wasnt doing drugs! Anyway I had asked my husband months ago if they asked those questions when I was reading and he said no. Do you think you had any symptoms prior? I have always had low BP until abotu 4-5 months prior it was higher everytime it was taken. I was also under a great deal of stress and grief stricken prior but i was writing the wrong words in charts and having memory issues as well up to 6 months piror along with extreme fatigue. I did not have the headaches I have now but the fatigue was worse prior. Now i have to sleep because my headaches, b4 i had to sleep because I could not sit up any longer! Thanks for your reply, mary

Thanks Carl, I am such a dim wit tonight I should just go to bed but Monday I have appt with neurologist and I will ask for hopsital reports and maybe it will make better sense to me. I thought it did yesterday but by evening I had a bunch of new questions. The hematoma would be a clot where the blood in the CSF would be fresh, I think that is why they are not related. _ what is a CSF? Man, I am sneezing my head off, I can't believe I have a cold she says in a whining voice.

Michelle, I was just taking a bath and I was thinking 2 things. 1. That my answer to you probably sounded short as I was thinking so hard to ask/ word the question correctly while having headache. In fact while I was getting my pj's on & I was also thinking you all think " That Mary is so rude and blunt!" and my answer in my head to myself was " You should of seen my parents if you want to see blunt, direct to the point, rude" never say thank you" SO sorry my parents were German! ONLY Kidding you germans out there. 2. I did I get someones cold from BTG? So I apoligize for my short answer by the time I was done writing my responds I just did not even think to say thank you for your reply becasue I was so wrapped up trying to explain myself which I dont know if I even did. And of course I am ashamed for not even thinking of thanking you until I got upstairs in the bathtub where it is quite. Shame on me. Maryb

Michelle, I understand I will probably never get another - I am wondering if any of the non aneurysm SAH had more than one bleed at the same times as it is weird says my Dr. because more than one bleed is usually caused by anurysm but I had 2 different issues at one time which is very odd to him - I do however think the occipical lobe was ready to burst for at least 6 months as I was doing odd things with writing wrong and saying wrong words etc.. It is one of those things you will never know but I believe the one was there for awhile. I also wonder if the brain stem SAH just pushed the other one over the edge with the high blood presssure etc that happens when that headache hits. So the question is "Is it odd to have more than one with a non aneurysm bleed or not?" If so I may or should I get a second opinion as much as I like my dr. Thanks, m

One bleed? & where was it?