amexdm Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Hello all: I have been meaning to post this thread for a while but in the meantime have been a little busy at work. I see alot of new members here and wanted to welocme them. I am 22 months in to SAH. Doing better but not 100%. I wanted to share with our new members the saga of the TWO Month Terrror I would call it. If, I wrote a book it would be chapter two. Some of us suffer a bit of a shock when we hit the two month mark of the SAH. Now mind you, not everyone feels it but from what I have read here there are many that have. What happens is at two months, the enormity of the SAH hits us. Typically, the first two weeks we are in the hospital. We get discharged. We get sent home with mostly no information. We are told we should be "recovered in 3-6 months. We rest for a month. 8 weeks hits and all of a sudden the SAH hits you like a ton of bricks. Speaking for myself, I realized that it did indeed HAPPEN and I would likley never be the same again. At two months, I happened to about 4 hours away on vacation and I had a few beers and realized I wasnt the same. I started crying right there in the bar, (happened to be a casiono). My wife was ith me thankfully. I went outside and just cried for like and hour. I'm have heard of this happening to other SAH'ers. I'm not trying to be negative, I'm just trying to give new folks a heads up. At around two months, it's gonna hit you that you had a brain injury. It may hit you hard. Let it hit you. Cry if you must. Just be aware and that it is part of the recovery process. I know others have felt this happen and wanted to try and share my experience. Any vets that care to share as well, that would be great. Good luck and stay with BTG, David Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iola Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 That is soooooo true. I just hit my two months and the realization that I am not the same person I was prior to Apr 9th is jaw dropping to say the least. Glad it is not just me. Thank you for this post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skippy Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 Yep - I'm 7 years in August and the two month mark was probably the time I came undone. I tried to fight it - but it was pointless. I saw a counsellor, who was a massive help and helped me realise it wasn't my fault, I was allowed to be angry but no need to feel guilty. Cry if you need to cry, laugh when you can and try to accept the "new" you. I've actually quite gotten to liking the new me - cos now I know my limits which I never did before and everything was done to the extreme - worked hard and partied hard too - now I know the meaning of everything in moderation. The emotional rollercoaster that can hit is all perfectly normal for a trauma such as this - all to each and every one of you - we're all here for each other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amexdm Posted June 10, 2013 Author Share Posted June 10, 2013 Hi all: Yes, I wanted to add to something Skippy said that I had tried to fight it and pretend all was ok, but I was holding it all in. So I just lost it and cried in fornt of like 100 people and i didnt even care. My point is, let it out in whatever way is best for you but don't hold it in. Skippy- Nice to see you young lady. I am actaully going to see a counsellor Friday. It's free and part of the Pain CLinic I go too. My point of this counselling is to figure out my PTSD and how to enjoy life again. Iola- I thought you were arouund two months and a few others like yourself and wanted to share this with you. I'm glad you were able to read it. Hope to hear from others. David Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gill C Posted June 10, 2013 Share Posted June 10, 2013 I just re read some of my posts from the 2 month mark, boy was I sure I could be back to normal even though everyone told me it would take more time!! I was pushing myself far too hard & emotionally I was a wreck, lots of temper & tears. I have always been on to let it iout (as hubby will attest to) but I didn't expect to feel so much emotionally unstable. I was still convinced at that stage I could do it all on my own!! It wasn't until Jan (6 months post op) that I got help from Headway & that was the start of my road to acceptance. I did see a neuro pysch but not for counselling which I thought I needed but for mood management (CBT basics) which helped some but wasn't really what I needed. 2 months is so early (insert scream of frustration here!) & for us looking back its much easier to give advice than it was to accept it at that time. To all you newbies, welcome to the family & it really does get better (just be patient!:crazy:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cheezo Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 (edited) Thank you David for starting this post and thank you for all who have replied. This is why i joined a forum to get info like this- its fabulous because although everyone is different at least now if it happens i can say well its happened to lots of people not just me so its 'normal' and that i think will help I had my sah on 8th of may so a few weeks till my 2month mark Thanks lesley Edited June 11, 2013 by cheezo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElaineJ Posted June 11, 2013 Share Posted June 11, 2013 Hi David I can honestly say I've never gone through the 'why me?' stage and even after 2 years it still hasn't really hit me that this thing has happened (mega deep denial possibly!). However it was about the 2 month mark that I really hit a wall with severe mental and physical fatigue symptoms (although I didn't actually know that's what they were then)and ended up back in hospital. Even if my conscious brain hadn't registered that this momentous event had happened I think that was my unconscious brain telling me in no certain terms! Elaine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kpaggett Posted June 14, 2013 Share Posted June 14, 2013 Boy, I was in a bad place then. I was soooooooo morbid. I still am sometimes My vertigo didn't let up until after 3months so I felt awful. Sick every AM and crying uncontrollably as I didn't have enough energy to fold one load of laundry. I cried and cried when my husband went to work every day, like I was a kid with separation anxiety. I'm glad that I am not in that place anymore. But it does make me think of how proud I am that I worked with my left hand diligently every single day so that I could get it back. I was a striver, that's for sure. Thank you past Kris for working so hard, you've helped me more than I could ever express. So grateful. ~Kris Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Winb143 Posted June 15, 2013 Share Posted June 15, 2013 (edited) I am glad I don't remember much as I now laugh about things I said to my Family. First meal in hospital " Get my bag Sarah this is my treat" thought I was in café. Called physio's a load of witches. Guess I was so out of it or maybe I was saying what I really thought about them! I sang to nice ones on ward, and cried at the rest. I have no memory of the whole situation, until a year later when shunt was fitted and that switched my brain on again. phew !! Good luck to the ones getting better Never Ever give up xx Regards WinB143 Good thread David x Edited June 15, 2013 by Winb143 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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