Jump to content

sorry for my absence...


Recommended Posts

it's been a busy couple of months.

to cut a very long story short my husband learnt how to use his mobile phone and it was only then that we realised how much he was being neglected in hospital.

he hadn't had an eye test, physio, occupational therapy or anything and we were told he would move to a rehab hospital nearer home when a bed was available. he spent weeks sitting staring at the floor waiting to be moved, then we found out someone hadn't sent in the relevant paperwork for him to be transferred.

hubby was begging to leave hospital so we picked him up. the hospital phoned our gp and ordered her to come round our home and see hubby, to have him sectioned and to ring the police for me to be arrested for kidnap of a vulnerable adult! g.p. said he was fine and said the hospital had really ****** up by neglecting him for so long and were running scared.

he's been having different therapies as an outpatient at our local hospital and he's a different man from the scared, confused one that came home a month ago. they said he wasn't of sound mind and couldn't make decisions for himself, yet yesterday he instructed our daughter while she rebuilt her broken computer. they said he couldn't walk yet he shoots round the town like a 3 year old.

they said they didn't know what was wrong with his eyes, and we now know he has hemianopia and has lost 50% of his vision. he now has a white stick and is learning to cope really well.

the staff had often called him stupid and said he couldn't communicate, but he's now having speech therapy for severe aphasia.

i started massaging his right hand and arm when he came home as his hand was tightly clenched. when he first started to open it his skin was soggy and wrinkled as if he'd been in the bath too long. the doctor in our local hospital said if we hadn't have got it open when we did it would have stayed clenched permanently.

he's going to meetings with other stroke survivors and learning to read and write again. he's come so far in such a short time. i have put a huge complaint report in to hospital in cardiff outlining all the things they did wrong, which included throwing his medication in the bin when he hadn't taken it (i witnessed that myself), not taking him to the toilet when he wanted, leaving him sitting in the day room for hours on end when he couldn't make himself understood to anyone, not helping him eat his food, losing his personal items, shuffling him round from ward to ward when they got overcrowded and many many more things.

i'm sure as his speech improves we'll find out a lot more things that went on there. i'm horrified at how he was treated compared to the care and attention that he's received locally. the doctors in cardiff spoke to him like he was a small child - he can't believe that the people he meets here speak to him like a fellow adult and immediately understand the difficulties he has with speaking.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thank you for the update.

What a horrifying time your hubby was having, treated as he was. No wonder there was no improvement. It sounds as if your GP is totally on your side and will not even try to cover up for the hospital. That is a very good thing.

It is heart warming to hear you say that he is now improving in leaps and bounds due to the treatment that he is getting.

May there be much more improvement and will look forward to hearing about it in the future.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can't quite believe what you have been going through - totally shocking how your husband and yourself have been put through all this.

I'm really pleased he has made the progress he has since coming home and being treated locally and long may it continue.

Best wishes,


Link to comment
Share on other sites

hi sweetheart

this has made my blood boil im glad you have hubby home I really am

you have a criminal case here talk to the local police and press charges for neglect abuse of a patient if you have names charge each one including the dr who was in overall charge of hubby or even get the press involved you have my number give me a call if you wish

you have all my best wishes to you both and good luck with hubbys recovery

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Glad your hubby is home Hwy xx

My hubby made sure I was not left alone for same reasons.

Now forget those who were horrid to hubby just get him back as it sounds like he is better off at home.

Keep bright for hubby, you can do it xx a song please as it helps with words xx

Good luck to you All xx

WinB143 xx xx

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Firstly I am so glad he is home and that he is making steady progress and gains in his recovery. Are the ferrets helping? :lol:

What you describe of his treatment is just awful but I am not entirely shocked having witnessed many scenes whilst I was in hospital that I would prefer to forget. At the time I actually intervened and on occasions so did my family member but you need a strong advocate at all times is what I have learnt. You have been that for your husband so well done!

There are amazing people in any workplace , lots of them and mostly they outnumber the incompetent, the bullies and the uncaring but Unfortunately in the NHS it's when these people are left alone with vulnerable people that it just creates awful awful scenarios like you describe.

If you can then write to the patient liaison of the hospital and share your experiences as it may help them safeguard others in the future who, like your hubby, need care, patience and compassion. Sending hugs. Hope his recovery continues at a pace.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

hi sweetheart

im sorry about my outburst yesterday it was unforgivable and I apologise to you.

having been fighting this same thing in regard to lin and seeing it printed on here made my blood boil. I was due to go to Birmingham this morning to see a barrister regarding the lack of care given to lin.

and I had my eyes open wide this morning but the dr and hospital are in deep do do as new regulations came in last year regarding bleeds of the brain from the bma so im contacting them for a copy of there regulations fingers crossed I will get a copy, and hopefully it will help others.

again I do apologise for my outburst.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

no apology needed - i could feel your anger pouring out in your post and you have every right to feel like that, given what you and your lovely wife have been through.

i've heard from the hospital - they've given me a named person to help me through the complaints procedure so i'll keep you posted.

best wishes to all of you - you're such a fantastic bunch of people, oh and win - the leader of the local stroke group is a singer and bursts into song at the drop of a hat - you'd get on well with her :biggrin:

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 year later...

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Create New...