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Pressure from work


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Hi,

Hope everyone is well.

Jim suffered his SAH December 1, 2007. He is only working half days because he still tires so easily.

We live in Boston and there is a lot of snow in the Winter. Jim works at a rehab center and the employees do the snow removal. His boss has been giving him a bit of a hard time since he cannot shovel or do any type of real physical activity as it gives his head pressure. I do the removal at our home so it is not as if he is trying not to do it at work.

He is getting so stressed about telling his boss he is unable to do it that I am worrying about him. He does go back to his GP next week and will make sure he gets a note stating he cannot do that type of work and that he still is unable to work full days.

It makes me so mad that someone who does not know about suffering a SAH can be so uncaring to Jim's feelings. Maybe his boss should step back a bit and ask Jim how he is feeling instead of asking him how long he is going to be on half days of when he can start back doing things he did before he suffered his SAH.

Sorry for being long winded but I am so upset with uncaring people who do not understand how much this can change someone and that Jim did not ask for this to happen to him. :evil:

Thanks for reading!

Cal

XXXXX

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Hi Cal,

It's freezing cold down the South of England too ...... thankfully, no snow......but the frost is still lying.....

Really sorry to hear that Jim is under pressure and thank goodness that he's seeing his GP next week, to get a note to give to his Boss...

I know how Jim feels ..... I'm self employed and do the odd bit of sub-contracting for my old firm ...... well, I had to do a large mailshot of 2009 calendars for the company and the boxes were big and heavy and needed to be posted ..... before the SAH, I would have struggled and carried them down to the mailing/post office, but not any more (I still have a neck left on my aneurysm) ...... as I know that the stress on my head, wouldn't do me any good ..... so had to ask for help from some big strapping males .....

Well, I felt a bit of a weakling for asking, as these guys didn't know my medical history ........ but sometimes, you have to do what's good for you .... but it didn't sit easy with me ..... I've never liked asking for help.....

Jim's boss needs to walk a mile in Jim's shoes .....

Take care Cal....xx

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Hi ,i know what he is going through,since my stroke 3 yrs ago and a major relapse june last year (through trying to do to much)it is very hard to keep up ,i have had a lot of support from the stroke unit at my local hospital which is still ongoing,i am lucky that my employer lets me work 2-3 mornings a week and work the rest frpm home,but even now i tire very fast.its something that you have to find what works best for him,and of course with world credit crunch as well you feel that you need to work. one thing for sure he is not alone.paul

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Guest Beth1957

Oh dear, poor Jim. I find it astonishing that the boss at a rehab centre, of all places, should be so unsympathetic and insensitive! Perhaps Jim's GP could write a letter/note explaining that recovery can take an awfully long time?

All the best to you both

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Hi Cal!

My best wishes and support for both of you.

One of my jobs is as a part time paperwork clerk. For a surgeon!!! First thing he asked me as soon as I got back at the workplace was if I would be able to carry on. Not a word about how I was. I remember feeling petrified at the idea of losing the job and just nodded and was unable to do/say anything else at the time. Totally intimidated. I have been able to manage because it hardly requires physical work. Occasionally I have to shift old boxes with tons of papers in them and it exhausts me. I couldn´t do a physical job. As long as things get done, I am allowed to set my own timetable and I try to go to the clinic when I know I will be on my own. I feel safer. Of all places, I find no understanding there at all.

Pre-SAH I was very competitive and pushed myself too hard. Now, I have to discard those old ways and also recognize and protect myself from people who still insist I adopt them. I have made new friends and some people have simply disappointed me but I have developed a certain shrewdness in dealing with people who don´t understand or are uncaring. I try to be one step ahead of them.

Wishing you both the best,

Lots of love

Nurianna

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hi Cal

What an insensitive pig this man sounds. I've been lucky in respect of going back to work and understanding how this has changed me. Jim mustn't back down - he should ask his boss to pick up something heavy and ask him where he feels the pressure - I still can't lift anything heavy now - luckily my daughter is too old to be picked up otherwise it'd make me so sad.

Hopefully Jim's GP will be more sympathetic than his boss - like Beth said - the boss of a rehab centre should have more sympathy!!!

Take care both of you

Love Sami xxx

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Thank you all so much for your support.

I am typing a letter today for Jim to take to his GP and also his boss with an extra copy for the woman in HR. We both put a lot of thought into this over the week-end and realize Jim cannot and will not accept this from his boss.

He did tell his boss on Friday that he could not do the snow removal and once his again the Uncaring Man gave him a hard time. Jim tried to explain to him that he is the one that is having a hard time with not being able to do the things he once could do. For 8 years Jim did not miss one snow storm at his work.

Jim will not back down. He was so mad Friday. I also think his feelings are hurt because his boss is so insensitive. Not once has he asked how Jim is feeling.

Wish us luck. We are fighting this. :wink: Jim's health is the most important thing. We are so lucky he is here and we are going to make sure he does not have a set back.

Thanks again!

Cal

XXXX

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