donna79

I'm just looking for the support from other suffers at this time or anyone who can help me with my frame of mind x I have been waking up for the past 1 1/2 weeks feeling like i dont want to be here anymore but also scared that i am going to do something stupid ( feeling i have no control over my mind ) I feel that i had no control over the bleed so i dont have any control over weather i do something stupid x I have gone to the doctor i have NOW been referred to a councellor for post trumatic stress and have been recommended to take my diazapam at night and once in day if needed, i wanted to avoid taking drugs but feel i dont have a choice because my thoughts are so strong x I am looking for whatever support i can from anyone who has had or having these horrible strong thoughts ( i feel they are ruling me ) I try and stay positve BUT i am finding it really really hard x x x

Keith I went to my support group wasnt going to go but hubby made me has i was on a all time low....... I fount it brightend my spirits being around people who know exactually how i felt.....dont know what i would do without it so WELLDONETo you for supporting others you are what i call life saver x x x x

Thankyou guys I am listening to what you are all saying................ Can i explain to everyone how i feel and if anyone feels the same please pm i just dont want to feel alone x I feel really really down and like i am making myself ill and scared what this will lead to... I am scared of dying ( and scares me how close i came ) and i dont want to leave my 2 year old and family which is making it hard for me to get close to them I am crying ALL the time and feel weak dizzy tired and like my legs dont want to work x I feel like i dont want to be here anymore and dont deserve to be.................i feel selfish and ungrateful..............i feel i have no control over my body and it wants to pack in............... I keep telling myself that i wont die from depression and that my head is fine and wont happen again x x x Any thoughts that people think may help please tell me i am at my wits end here xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx I am on paroxitine 20mg and am waiting for a call from doctor to see if she thinks i should up the dose x x Sorry to go on ( one day i will be ok and show you all i am normal x )

Thankyou guys I will try and do what is recommened even though it seems easier said than done............. I will make a positive list I will try and change negative for positive I will remember its like a ball all ravelled up and is undoing slowly and eventually will be just one piece of string. SAH is all i think about what it could off done and horrible thoughts.......all day long........... I have appointment with my councillor at 12pm and will let you know how it goes........... Thankyou again and thankyou sami for our chat x x x

Karen i was looking up depression........... I found this post and i feel this way and feel there is now way out.......... I am speaking to anyone who i feel can help me but i feel lost and alone.............. I feel scared ( petrified it will happen again ) scared of fainting and waking up with tibes everywhere its horrible and i dont see how i am going to get through this................ I take paroxitine and was taking odd diazapam has and when needed but i dont wont to take it anymore to many side effects x x and something else to come off and i just want to get the meds out my system and hopefully weird feelings will subside x I have read the posts and i really wish i could click my fingers and all this be ok

Holly just read your post on here and that is what i get................ How do you feel now have they stopped because they are blinking awful........

I never know what to say to peoples storys They always touch me and your daughter how brave xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Its horrible for our familys also and i think sometimes I forget what they must of felt like x x

hi nurianna You sound like you are doing extremely well and good on you.............like everyone says listen to your body small steps will lead to big improvements xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Fantastic news onwards and upwards xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

at last hun x x Hope all is well i'm sure it will be x

Shiree SNAP Everything you have said ME TOO i have demanded blood tests which i am making appointmet for today and just about to get bp checked but always fine ( great i've cursed it ) .................... Are we TWINS

Keith.......do you know i can walk talk and move all my limbs..........so why am i like this If you can do it so can I...........my problems are nothing compared to yours so maybe i will tell my councellor to kick me up the back side ( its big enough ) god did i crack a joke..... What an inspiration you are READY FOR NEXT PART X

oh sugar i didnt mean it like that dont worry guys x x I was just looking up at the person to have coils the longest period of time which is 13 years so far.............. only because i know coils are a new thing but the best x x x x Hope i havent worried anyone pm if you want

Hello love xx I have been suffering really bad with my neck for these past few days and they gave me some tablets which i stopped because they have to many side effects............touch wood not to bad x I am going to try and find one of these bean bags i have been told they are good..... plus i have my v pillow i love x x x

I am going to have some blood tests to rule things out i am going to demand it x Its our lives so we decide what to do from now on what makes us feel better x

Awaiting the next part xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I know what you mean holly its all scary but what else can we do apart from live the life we have been given second chance to live... and it scares me to think that i am 29 and plus 13 will make me 44 which is no age so cant wait for the success rate to get higher x x

hello glad to hear your brother is getting better xxxxxxxxxxxx you are a valuble sister to have around xxxxxxx

Hope all goes well at the appointment x x x hope all goes well with the ct scan x x x will be thinking of your mum x x x

john good luck at neuro and enjoy the 60th xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx fingers crossed all is well xxxxxxxxxxx

HI CYBERHORSE MEL welcome i had my sah on 9th april this year and still finding it hard to get my head round x x x If there is anything i can help with plesae ask x x x

never heard of that scott but i would do it..................... plus it sounds like you get a free mot on your body

I have just started feeling hungry all the time xxxxxxxxx does any1 else suffer from this

I dont know about you anne but i always say to myself shall i fight it or not because sometimes the fatigue comes on at a time i wont to go out and do something x x

thats something i need to sort out matthew and i go with legal and general x x just cancelled it before my sah typical hey x