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Martin
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A fortnight ago my sister became unwell, two days later, after presenting at A&E she was diagnosed with a SAH and transferred to a neurology unit. The following day the aneurysm was coiled.   For the first few days after the procedure she was fine, tired in a lot of pain, but her spirits were high.  Then the vasospasms started and she developed aphasia which was quite distressing for her.  Two weeks on now and the prospect of discharge is on the cards, I think she has mixed feeling about this. Can anyone offer any advice on how best to support her when she does come home.  She has two relatively young children at home.

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Hi welcome to BTG, sorry to hear about your sister. 

 

I am am sure she is nervous about coming home it is a daunting prospect after being looked after 24/7 in hospital. 

 

My my advice would be to give her peace and quiet. Don't expect her to do anything about the home unless she really wants to. Encourage her to rest and drink plenty of water.

It may sound awful but try and keep the kids away from her if they are being noisy, I really struggled with noise at first, even the TV had to be on low.

 

You have made a good start by coming here and asking for advice. There is loads on this site so take some time to look about and read others posts. 

 

Let us know how she is doing. She is lucky to have such a caring brother. 

 

Clare xx

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Hi Martin, Welcome to BTG,Sorry to hear about your sister,

 

It is a nervous time when you first come out of hospital,

 

The advice that Clare has given is exactly what I would have said myself,

Try to keep things as peaceful as you can for her, especially the noise levels.

 

Don`t expect to much to soon, recovery is a slow process after such a trauma,

the body and the brain need time to recover.

 

I think it`s lovely that you have come here for help and advice to help her,

 

Let us know how she is doing, good luck

 

Love

Michelle xx 

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Hi Martin,

 

All what Chelle and Clare have already said.

 

No Stress or expecting her to be able to cope as before the SAH.  It is a long haul for all of you but let her know how much she is loved and get some rest yourselves as it is also hard work for carers. 

 

Keep anyone who loves doom and gloom stories away from her as she needs to be happy and not stressed out by others problems. 

Hard when she has 2 children xx She will get there with the love of her Family  xxxx

 

Take care all of you and good luck to Sister xxxx

Regards

Winb143 xxxx Note: My brother and sisters sang to me and it helped me a lot xxxx

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Hi Martin

 

It's very caring of you to post about your sister so you can help ease her return home. It will be nerve racking for her and you all and she will be used to having the 24/7 care of the hospital ward at her disposal so it can make you feel a little vulnerable. 

 

Explaining to the the kids at home so they understand that mummy is  not quite able yet to do all the things she did previously is important and also that she will need some extra help to get better. Having Things on hand that they could together quietly is a nice helping idea, like colouring books or maybe some audio bedtime story books so that can all lie in bed together. I missed that most with my littlies, they were 8 and 6 when it happened and when I finally got home that was the first thing we all did. I went to bed ( I couldn't read or concentrate at that point ) and they clambered in with me and we just hugged , listened together and I went off to sleep happy. 

 

Help with the food is so useful, not having to think about preparing meals so having some on hand in freezer or fridge and getting  the shopping in , food shops are disaster zones with all the noise and people it's not particularly injured brain friendly , basically any practical help or arranging routines that you can give until she says ' stop' will help and give her the space to rest and heal her brain which will pay dividends. Same goes with the washing, Subs will attest to that, he's still doing it!!! If the kids are older they can help with some of this like organising their own school kit etc.

 

The aphasia can appear to be funny to the kids, they think it's hilarious to be honest that you say the wrong thing or mix stuff up but that can be quite emotionally upsetting so noticing when maybe sister is a bit over stimulated ( losing words will go up a notch) and then suggesting some quiet time for everyone, turning down any background noise and maybe just quiet games or a gentle walk. 

 

If she can just try doing old stuff little and often to the limit of what she feels is ok and happy with then she will start to find any new limits, heed them for now and in time you will look back and see how far she has come. 

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Hi there, warm welcome glad that you found us...

 

I think we're all nervous when we are getting home pleased but worried there is no longer in that safe bubble they hospital provides...

 

It is a slow process great ideas and tips from Daff

 

 

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Thank you all so much for taking the time to respond, it's heartening to know that there are people out there who have lived experience of this who can share practical advice and provide support. I'm so glad I found this forum.  Thank you all again.

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Hi Martin

 

Hope your sister is making good progress with her recovery.  When she's feeling up to it, please do get her to look at this site - there's always someone around at some point who can offer advise (though not medical advise as none of us are qualified to do so) or a view to their own experience.

 

This site was a godsend to me over 10 years ago, and I honestly don't know where I'd be without it now.

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