Help for meltdowns

[Vermont Girl]

So, I am 10 weeks out and having meltdowns when frustrated. Then my blood pressure spikes. Using all my tools - yoga, meditation, walking, talking, distraction - but it's got a hold on me.

 

Worries about return to work, my laptop was assigned to someone else but I thought it was missing and fretted over that for days. 

 

Before this, I was described by everyone as inordinately calm, focused- that's not what I'm seeing now. Hard to keep from lashing out at frustrations.

 

Last week my GP gave me a med that is clearly contraindicated for people with bleeding, stroke or heart issues. It's for rheumatoid arthritis which I do not have.

 

Have to meet with her tomorrow. It's a prescription drug similar to Advil, Alleve, the ones I should not take for the headache. I've not taken it.

 

Takes so much energy to push back. Sorry for the complaints - worse day yet for me. And even still, I know I'm as lucky as can be for my relatively mild sequels to the bleed. Words of wisdom anyone?  Thanks!

Edited July 26, 2017 by Karen
Paragraphing/line spacing for easier reading

[ClareM]

Hi Vermont Girl, I do not understand why your doctor has given you an anti-inflammatory pain killer, was this for your mood or because you have pain? I checked with my Nurse Specialist about taking Ibuprofen which is a similar drug and was told it was ok for me as my bleed had no cause. However I think you should discuss with your doctor tomorrow why she is prescribing this and whether the neuro docs have said it is ok.

 

It is common to feel frustrated after a SAH, I still have times now. Try to use all those tools you mention and take you time organising you return to work. Ideally it should be a phased return. Have you spoken to your employers yet?

 

I hope you get on with your doctor tomorrow and get some answers.

 

Clare xx

[Vermont Girl]

Hi Clare - it was for my headache but I assume it was done in error. Will ask her tomorrow - will also check with neurologist. 

Yes, , I think I need to slow down my expectations of myself. Will also try consultation with neuropsychologist, I think. 

Employers are being helpful - will meet with them again following my next neuro appointment. I think I'll have the flexibility I need - if I ask for help which is not the easiest thing for me to do.

 

Thank you. 

[Chris G]

I pray you feel better soon. I know it's not really a guy thing but I took 2 to 3 hot baths a day for several weeks after I got out of the hospital. They seemed to help relax me. I tapered off to almost none again now but at the time I really was thankful for them. Maybe that would help you?

[Daffodil]

Hi Vermont girl, 

 

I do wonder if you perhaps are asking too much of yourself in these early weeks since your bleed. 

 

It sounds like you expect so much of yourself and I have empathy with that as I felt the same way. I wanted to prove to myself and others just what I was capable of and so I often pushed past my warning signs and then I would have emotional meltdowns. Mine were more tears, but it's called emotional lability and you don't have the same triggers as before to set you off or the same controls. 

 

You need to start noticing your new traffic light system , it's like a temporary system which they keep changing. If you feel you have a green light with your brain energy then proceed but drive to your rules if you have an amber then start to slow and pay attention and if it's red, stop. Just stop. It doesn't have to be long but pure silence.

 

You talk about meditation but are you doing that daily? Also talking for me wore me out the most especially if there was multiple conversations happening I had to follow so pace yourself with how much you do, build it up. 

 

Take stock of where you are now, note what affects you at the moment and I would ask and take all the help you can get to manage your feelings. 

[Winb143]

My Surgeon told me not to stress as it is bad for us but we all get it !! 

 

I handle it by singing happy songs as it helps me, but not hubby  xx 

 

I do get bad days but the good outweigh the bad and I keep away from family who keep telling me there problems.  

I say "I cannot have sob stories Sis as I need happiness"  Some Sisters understand this,  some do not..

 

Surround yourself  with times when you laughed until you cried tears of happiness xx Keep a smile at hand.  Most of all look after you while getting better.  Yes be Selfish if need be xx

Smiling helps and other little methods to keep stress at bay. 

Good luck 

Win xxxxxxxx

[Macca]

Hi,

 

Please stop beating yourself up about this.  Ten weeks out is nothing.  This is a brain injury you are talking about, not a graze on your finger!  Forget everything else except your health.  That is what counts.  What you are experiencing is fairly common especially so soon after your SAH.

 

When you get your tablets changed, the first thing you should do is check the leaflet that comes with it.  Your doctor will only have an idea about the main effects of the drug, and by taking it you are giving your consent to take it.  The leaflet will explain about the side effects possible with that drug, so make sure you know what they are because your doctor is not obliged to tell you them all.  People often mistake them for the effects of SAH and so if you get any 'funny feelings' you will have an idea what is causing them.  Any worries or doubts, or any things that don't fit in with the leaflet, then get straight back to your doctor's.

 

GP's often have little knowledge of SAH, so the people who treated you are the best ones to go to for help and advice.

 

After ten weeks, you haven't even given yourself a proper chance of recovery - so patience is the order of the day.  You are trying to get back to what you think is 'normal' but doing it far too fast.

 

Stop being in such a rush to be a hero to your own consciousness.  Slow down and be a coward, like me!  I'm still here over six years out! It sounds like you are doing great but in my opinion, you are expecting too much too soon.  Just rein it in a bit and you'll be fine. Even Superman has to re-charge the Kryptonite!

 

Do things in bite-sized chunks, don't eat the steak all in one go!

 

Best wishes,

 

Macca

[iola]

Um, I still have meltdowns and I'm 4.5 years post brain pop.  It's so frustrating knowing what you could do and now what your brain says you cannot do, right now.  You look in the mirror and maybe you see the same face and body and that's what everyone else sees.  So, look a little deeper and then look again. This  truly life changing, pretty awful,  event did happen to you. Yes, it did and there is nothing you can do about it other than let your brain heal.    

 

I have tried everything.  Walking, yoga, Botox (although it was nice they also put it where my two wrinkles are between my eyes!), acupuncture, those terrible shots in the back of your head, chiropractor, blah, blah, blah.  None of it worked.  Thought it did in the beginning but there are just those times when nothing helps and you just deal.  Unsatisfactory, but there it is at least for me.  I just keep pushing forward.   There is no miracle cure I am aware.

 

Don't worry about your meltdowns, it's okay to meltdown some times.  ?

 

iola

 

[Krislwal]

Just curious which drug as I've had Rhumatoid Arthritis for 13 years now and have been on my share of disease modifying drugs.  Thanks

[Xmartz]

Vermont girl,

 

Hi! I hope you are not going back to work too soon after such an injury. I am more than two years out and have been placed on permanent disability. I'm lucky to have a husband to support my family; even if we are barely squeaking by.

Be kind to yourself! Expect that you will have days like this. It is out of your control!

 

As for the anti-inflammatory drug, I was told by my docs to NEVER take them again. However, I am on blood thinners so that may make a huge difference.

feel better and don't beat yourself up about the moods. Find things that are therapeutic for you. For me it's painting and listening to music. I also love nature.

Feel better and God bless!

 

Mandie

[Vermont Girl]

Thanks, Mandie. Having a much better week. Waiting on results from follow up MRI. Saw GP, told her I'm not going to take the inflammatory. Not sure she knows enough about subarachnoid hemorrhage. Communication from neurologist to her has not been ideal. Frustrating to have to educate health care provider. 

At any rate, doing yoga, meditation, time at home very helpful.