SarahLou

I had my surgery at the Wessex Neurological Centre at Southampton General Hospital and had a nurse specialist who you could contact at any time, and I did,many times. She has been totally brilliant. I thought all neuro centres would have this support?? The Wessex is organising a support group meeting as of September. To be totally honest I don't know how I would have coped without the nurse specialist, Lesley is a true star. SarahLou Xx

Hi Ian, Yes, you're probably busier now than when you worked! Although at least you can go at your own pace now. I'm lucky enough to have a gp who is totally fantastic, actually listens to me. She's been my gp for many many yrs and has helped me through some really rough journeys and very dark times over the yrs. It's nearly a yr since my SAH, I only worked part time but have been unable to go back to work yet. I worry theyll make me medically redundant. I try not to worry about it, I've gotta concentrate on myself, the here and now. Hope you manage to get some rest in your retirement, no doubt you deserve it. SarahLou Xx

Hi Ian, I know what you mean about knowing the info is in your brain, you just can't retrieve it. I often will be in the middle of a sentence and completely loose my words, I know they're there, just can't get them out. It'll often cause me tears of frustration. I also struggle if I'm on the phone, or in a shop. Most of the time I will explain to strangers, 'I've had a stroke and brain bleed, please bare with me if I struggle with my words'. It sounds like you have a busy and demanding job, you should be very proud of yourself for getting back to it so soon. SarahLou Xx

I truly wish that I could offer some advise when we're playing the waiting game for test results. It's something my dear hub and I have gone through for many years now. He's waiting on some now. I just wanted to let you know that I know how you feel. Hope your results come back soon and that it's all good news. Big hugs to you all. SarahLou Xx

Hi Janet, Welcome to BTG. You had your SAH in may and people are already saying that?? Wow. Get them to look at this site. There is not enough info for patients and carers/ families. My sister said to me the other day that they all didn't realise how long recovery would take. Neither did I, I thought I'd be back to work after a few months. Right now I just don't see how I could cope with work, and I loved my job, done it for 20yrs, minus a few yrs when I had my daughter and some time off due to other health issues. You will find this site a great source of info, and it's such a relief to be able to go through the highs and lows with people who truly understand. You take all the time you need because hopefully time really will be a healer. SarahLou Xx

Morning Di, Omg what's wrong with some people!!?? You dont look old to me, quite a stunner from the looks of your photo if you don't mind me saying! I feel far too yukky to even think about posting a photo of me on here!! When these people say you're old ask them when their last eye test was. Alas, I also do get a few comments of ' well you are nearly 40' when I'm struggling with memory etc, or worst still the 'oh yeah I've a rubbish memory too' speech.Which I get a lot. They've no idea. So you just keep your chin up hun, let's take a note outta Wins wisdom and sing a little song to cheer ourselves up!! SarahLou Xx

Hi Sandi, For nearly a yr before my SAH I was attending the eye hospital due to eye pains in my left eye. It hurt the most when looking up and in towards my nose. I had many tests and a ct scan, no sign of SAH then (April 2010) they found a prob with muscle movement on upper part of eye and were due to do steroid injections in october 2010. However had my SAH august 2010, it's clipped two inches behind my left eye. All a coincidence they say?? I have been to see consultant at eye hosp since SAH as now I get blurry vision on long distance, I have a lazy left eye and had a slight squint but SAH has made it much worse. They don't know if it will get better and I see them again in November. I'm also very light sensitive. I get headaches / pains on the left side all the time, the easiest way to describe it is it feels like someone is permanently pushing their fingers into my temple. I often get aches all over the left side of my head. Always wake up with head pains and can't sleep on that side for long. I can pretty much only have paracetamol as am limited with pain relief as I've only one kidney. When I last saw neuro consultant he said all these pains were normal but should ease with time. So,fingers crossed,infact everything crossed that they do! I hope your pains ease. SarahLou Xx

Hi Sam, welcome to BTG, I'm new to this site too and it's been like a godsend to me. I was 38 when I had my SAH least aug, wham, the end of things as you knew them. I know I've harped on about it before but if you haven't already please,please read 'a letter from your brain' on the home page in inspiration. It really does make you take a step back and think. You were a very fit active person before this happened to you and I can understand all your frustrations. I,like FionaH used to walk many miles a week, I also cherished the 'me' time I got from my 3 mile walk to work. I now have vision problems, I manage little walks,which I love,but wish I could do more. Fingers crossed in time I will. You've every right to be angry,don't think you'd be normal if you weren't! Take each day as it comes, your'll gain strength from the people on here. SarahLou Xx

I too am trying to take these words of wisdom and compare the difference to how I was just after they fixed me,rather than trying to hold onto how I once was. I couldnt feed myself, wash myself etc, I know I've come a long way, but hey this journey is sure lonely at times. SarahLou Xx

Hi Riane, Ahh,kids sure say things exactly as they see them. It's very refreshing. Bless her. SarahLou Xx

Hi WinB143, Thats fab,brill news. Sending a big hug. SarahLou Xx

...'aunie Leo is sick in the head'... Oh fab I roared laffin to that comment. hey,they say laughter is the best medicine. Bless that lil kiddie. I'm still chuckling ! SarahLou Xx

Hi Sharon, I'm so sorry to hear about your mum. Hang in there and stay strong. Today I talked to my sister for the first time about those early days. She doesn't live local but was with me when I came round from the op. I luckily don't have much memory of it all,don't remember going in the ambulance,being in a and e,or even the first ct. But a have very clear memories of the angiogram. Don't remember going down to the op etc etc. But I do remember the hazy faces of my sis, and my dad putting his hand into mine. My daughter who was 10 at the time only saw me once about 10 days after surgery for about 5mins, but that's ok,she's been through a lot in her little life and we are very very close. She has been a star and accepted the new me better than i have,tells me to lay down when she sees I'm tired,makes sure I do things like remember to put my seat belt on,the list is endless really. Your mum will always be your mum even if she will be a little different now. I wish your mum a good recovery,and remember that the strength you get from those around you will be your strength. Big hug to you. SarahLou Xx

Hey winb143, that hub of mine is doing fine, I gave him a kidney in 2006. We have some pretty amazing scars between us! I'm sure glad my sis didnt sing to me!the nurses woulda thought cats had got in the building! SarahLou Xx

Hi, Winb143 you saying about you swearing more made me chuckle, I've been lucky enough to spend some time with my sis over the last few days,she doesn't live close so don't see a great deal of eachother but she gets to notice changes in me, she commented yesterday 'Cor sis you don't arf swear a lot more now' . I seem to just say exactly what's on my mind now,alot more open and honest about things. Yes, I know I've changed and am slowly accepting the new me. Totally agree that it's like a grieving process, you need to grieve for what you once were/had. We were told to do exactly that when my dear hub was diagnosed with complete renal failure in 2003. Lifes lessons are tough and often seem unfair but I believe they make us stronger and better people. They certainly make you appreciate every single day. SarahLou Xx

Hi Raine, Wow, your words have left me speechless. I'm sending you a big hug. A few people have said to me why don't I write down my experiences, but I can't find the right words yet. How do you put into words a heart breaking scream that comes from the very core of you soul?? I hope that you find your light again soon hun,it's in there I promise. SarahLou Xx

Well, Choccibicci what is your previous pool teams loss will be your new ones gain. I too have had a hard lesson in learning who my true friends are. Funny how they could visit me when I was in hospital,looking like hell,staples in a shaved head,covered in bruises,a very dodgy left eye which I had no control over etc etc, yet they can't visit or even contact me now. I learnt who my true friends are,one dear friend bought me twister ice lollies on every visit,yum yum yum..helped my recovery no end! Bless her. So here's to true friends and the ones we make on here. SarahLou Xx

Hi, I'm new to this site,I've been watching from afar for a while. I've finally found the courage to write something!! Reading some of your comments is like reading my own thoughts. It's been nearly a year since my SAH and it's still a huge learning curve to me. I'm not 'me' anymore,it's all about acceptance and I'm not quite there yet. I too can't cope with crowds, busy shops etc,too much noise and too many conversations going on around me. Other people just don't understand,but you guys do. Each day is a new day and I know that I'll find my way back on track oneday. So,thank you BTG for the life line you've given me,it's so great to read that all I'm going through is normal,whatever normal is!! SarahLou Xx