Hope

[CFW]

Hi. I am reaching out to this group for hope. I am the newlywed wife of a husband who suffered from a subarachnoid hemmorage. It has been a long road for us, and he is recovering each day. I just wish we, or I, knew, what our life would be a year from now. We went from planning to buy a house and having children, to me handling everything. And, EVERYTHING. We are young, and I never expected this to happen. I just hope to hear from anyone who has positive experiences. Thank you so much.

[MaryB]

We are here for you, please give us a little more information. How old is your husband etc.. I live in the USA so I am on a different time schedule as most post. This place is my glue that holds me together. Everyday gets better, every month is a big improvement. I wish I kept a diary for how far I have come. I had my SAH in SEPT 2012 long with a stroke, and a brain tumor. I am improving each day. Tonight we had our small town "Taste" & "Art" wrap up party and I did great with live band etc. I wish you both well, this is a great place to come.

MaryB

[Winb143]

I think my family went through more than I did as I was totally in my own little world,,,,,, Look back every 2/3 weeks and note

the difference....it might be small things to you, but to hubby these are huge steps forward.....make sure you get rest also as

we can be demanding....lol...

I was told I would not walk....but I can walk a little now..before back goes...it is hard but you have each other

So I am sure you can make it.......I wish you Both All the Best...and keep Chins Up ....

All the Best

WinB143 xx oh and Welcome to BTG x

Edited July 1, 2012 by Winb143

[paul99]

hi cfw

i feel for you big time my lin collapsed in 2008 i have never given up hope you havent given much detail about hubbys sah lins was a class 5+ bleed and after the neurosurgeon gave her her life back unfortunantly the other hosptal didnt do their best but after nearly four years and my constant support lin is now moving on to hopefully better things because a new team see what i have seen for such a long time

it is a massive shock and yes you do go off into your own world i know i did it does get better there is a rollercoaster ride ahead but as time goes on things hopefully get better i know thats what im hoping for i cant say what going to happen in the next year but its got to be better than it is now you have to stay optimistic and say things will get better because you cant dwell on what might happen it would send you into a spiral which you will never get out of and would pull you down so far

the words that i hate is stay strong but all i can say is it will get better no matter what so chin up we are here anytime for support no matter what take care regards to hubby

[DawnS]

Hi cfw,

you have said that you are both young, what age is your husband? I had my haemorrhage last year when I was 35. My partner was told that my age would work in my favour for both survival and recovery. When was his sah? Over the last 10 months since mine, I have made significant improvements. To begin with, my memory was virtually non-existent. It's still a bit rubbish and can't be relied upon, but it's vastly improved now and I have also learned coping strategies to help. Like a diary is an essential part of my life now. I write everything down from appointments to medication, especially things like paractamol as I forget I've taken them almost instantly. I get physically stronger all the time and I can honestly say that I see improvements on a regular basis.

Dawn x

Edited July 1, 2012 by DawnS

[MaryB]

We are here for you, please give us a little more information. How old is your husband etc.. I live in the USA so I am on a different time schedule as most post. This place is my glue that holds me together. Everyday gets better, every month is a big improvement. I wish I kept a diary for how far I have come. I had my SAH in SEPT 2012 long with a stroke, and a brain tumor. I am improving each day. Tonight we had our small town "Taste" & "Art" wrap up party and I did great with live band etc. I wish you both well, this is a great place to come.

MaryB

Well maybe that was sept 2011. LOL

[Louise]

hI cfw

warm welcome to the site so glad you found us.

We never expect 'this' to happen I would guess a year from now life will be much better than now, because at the min everything is new and scarry but each day there will be improvements its not all gloom and doom be brave because our recovery comes through the help & love of others....

take care and we're here for you....

[Gill C]

Hi CFW & welcome to BTG

I had an anyurism in 2010 without the rupture, I did however have vasospasms during the op & at one stage I was dribbling. slurring & forgetful. Hubby admitted to me that I looked like my mum after her stroke & he thought that might be as good as it got!! Now I am so much better, I do forget stuff & write things on the calendar for the wrong date but I am driving again & taking my son to school every day. I still get fatigued but sometimes the recovery from it is a lot quicker provided that I do rest when I need too.

Emotionally I am a lot better too, I was scared of it happening again & couldn't talk about what happened to me without crying but once I admitted I needed help things got better quickly. I had a lot of help from Headway & from the neuro phsych at the hospital & eventally at 17 months post clipping I went onto anti depressants. I wouldn;t say I was clinically depressed but I was very very low without realising it & now I wished I'd taken them when they were offered earlier. Its not the answer for everyone but as long as your hubby continues to communicate his feelings to both you & his GP things will improve.In the beginnign the improvements are big & then day by day the improvements are still there just smaller & less noticeable.kee

I think being young & of postive mind is a good thing towards healing & getting better. Life won't be the same in every way that is used to be & more thank likely in a lot of ways it will be better

keep strong keep talking on here & you will both get there xxx

[Macca]

Hi CFW,

Welcome, in your darkest moments, this site is the biggest uplift you can get and the best place for true understanding of what it is like to live and breathe SAH from the inside as a sufferer and from the outside as a carer.

I think the first thing to realise is that every case is different, yet the same. The severity of individual conditions varies greatly, yet the mental anguish is the same because the condition has such a devastating and debilitating effect at such a personal level. Also, other outsiders will not appreciate the problem because you look the same, they can't see scars or broken bones. It's like looking at a computer that's had its insides ripped to bits, but you can't tell that just by looking at it. Only when you try to switch it on do you realise it isn't what it seems. You've got a different engine in the same model now and it will take some getting used to. You have now embarked on a long journey and as someone said on one of these threads - even the longest journey starts with a single step - well done for taking it!! Don't look back too much, just keep going and before you know it you will be nearer the end of the journey than the beginning. Sometimes it will be gruelling but the greatest rewards come from the greatest efforts. If it is hard, get on this site and tell us about it - we will support you with all we know. I had my SAH 1/9/2010. I'm back at work now - it's hard but I'm there. I still suffer with memory problems, my pituitary gland was damaged in the operation to save me, I suffer headaches, and light can be a problem for me and sometimes means I wear sunglasses when others wouldn't contemplate it! But I'm here and I'm still fighting. Your guy needs some help right now, but as time goes by that will become less. Keep that diary, as Dawn suggests, you will be amazed as time goes by at the improvements when you read back over it. I feel for you right now, as I'm sure anyone who has read your post does. Talk to us, let us share your burden and also your 'good' moments too because they are just as important. Encourage your partner to do small things but don't overburden him. Praise even the smallest successes, he needs confidence building. He probably is having to re-learn things he used to take for granted. It's hard to take for him and for you, but he can do it. He's had a shattering experience - you are his glue

We know

We understand

We are here

For both of you

Best wishes

Macca

Edited July 1, 2012 by Macca

[Guest]

Hi cfw

I am a newer member here - I don't post often, but stop in to check posts from time to time and reply to PM's. Although these boards have served their purpose well during my recovery, I can't justify staying simply because I've absolutely no side effects from the NA-SAH I experienced in January of this year. My main purpose in replying is to offer a story with a positive outcome.

So to summarize, I was 52 at the time and was undergoing treatment for breast cancer at the time of my SAH. Ten days out of my second surgery when it hit. I felt, not only the pain from the bleed, but felt hopeless as to not even having the results of my surgery. I had invasive cancer and they were checking if it had spread to the lymph nodes. It hadn't, but I didn't know that at the time. Three weeks in the various hospitals with repeated CT and angiograms, then released to my small community where there was very little support and/or knowledge of sah's and recovering from them. That's how I tripped on this website.

Initially I had all of my sensory faculties affected due to where the bleed occurred - right parietal lobe. I could not focus my vision, had no depth perception, my spatial mapping was non existent, my sense of touch was gone and my body felt numb, I could barely walk without the aid of a walker and could only function in a darkened setting as I couldn't tolerate light. And the initial headaches were frightening. There were other issues with my hearing plus still trying to recover from cancer surgery, so I was a bit of a mess.

Most issues were resolved between the sixth and eight week, such that I was able to return to driving, I attended weekly physio to get my strength and balance back and got my neuros permission to return to all prior activities as I felt able to do so. The only restriction was heavy weight lifting. I am almost six months post SAH and I completed radiation therapy to both breasts May 9th, which is double what most people go through as I had two primary cancers. Surprisingly, I suffered virtually no radiation related fatigue, which is unusual in itself. I took flying lessons during my trips to the cancer agency for my treatment and if it weren't for the costs, I would continue on with it.

The whole experience now seems surreal. Yes, I would be lying if I told you I don't get tired some evenings, but with having both my adult student children home for the summer, starting up a new job with a new company, my golf, gym and biking adventures, dealing with a beloved elderly cat who is not well - the usual busy-ness of life. I'm fortunate in a lot of ways. I don't wish my two illnesses on anyone, but I got through them. I call my SAH, my stroke of good luck. It allowed me to put cancer in perspective.

Mainly I stayed positive and believed very strongly that I would recover from my both of my health challenges. I clung to the one doctor that told me I would recover 100% and he wasn't a specialist, so I'm not sure how he could qualify telling me that, both about the stroke and the cancer. I saw him about a month ago in a chance meeting and he did not recognize me from my early days in the hospital and boy, did he smile. He was right....

I wish you and hubby all the best. You'll get there.

Sue