Xmartz Posted September 21, 2020 Posted September 21, 2020 Anyone else have friends just drop off the face of the earth after your bleed. Like it's too difficult for THEM to handle! My "friends" didn't want me coming on a women's weekend trip we do annually because they don't want me to be a burden if some health issue arises. It might ruin their time getting drunk!
Skippy Posted September 21, 2020 Posted September 21, 2020 Hi there I've got people that I don't see that often anymore but more to do with life than my SAH. I have two really close friends who were there before and have been there since. If they're seeing as a "burden" then, sorry, but they're not really friends. Do you know that they didn't invite you because they'd see you as a "burden" or did they not invite you so as not to make you either 1. feel guilty about not being able to go or 2. feel that you had to? Is there one of these friends that you're closer to than others that you can maybe ask??
Doonhamer Posted September 25, 2020 Posted September 25, 2020 This is so true over who are real friends. I’ve seen some friends I hadn’t seen for ages that were so supportive. Going out doesn’t matter. Online right now can help.
Daffodil Posted September 28, 2020 Posted September 28, 2020 I have friends who just think I’m boring because I don’t drink but also I think having me around scares them, makes them think how fragile life is. i don’t worry, they were decent friends and we had good times but understand they want the old version of me and I can’t bring that, so I just let them drift and new friends appear when you least expect it
Swishy Posted September 28, 2020 Posted September 28, 2020 I have read all these posts .... Casey doctors being uncomfortable is unacceptable, I hope you have found better you deserve better. I remember my grammies words "a friend in need is a friend in deed"....I get it life is scary and some people cope better than others but....Making a friend, a real friend takes some work it takes some nurturing so I think for the friends that have made a choice to back off, drift away perhaps they weren't the friends we had thought they were...and I love Daffodil's words "new friends appear when you least expect it". For the friends that stayed, supported and loved just the same...A true friend is a gift This is our next chapter, our second chance....one day at a time. xx Jean
Louise Posted September 29, 2020 Posted September 29, 2020 Oops just saw this. Yes friends but mostly family sadly. But those so called friends you talked about arent real friends those ones stick by, listen and adjust to YOU... take care, stay-safe.
SarahLS Posted September 29, 2020 Posted September 29, 2020 My SAH certainly showed who my true friends were, and happily with them I have a far better relationship. I was sad that some dropped away, I thought we had a stronger friendship than we did. On good days I can understand the fear that may have caused the split - I'm not good with acute illness either - but it does still hurt. My dentist would have good reason to be nervous around me as I had the first thunderclap headache in her surgery but she's always pleased to see me, even though any dental work is now far harder as we avoid the drug that possibly triggered the bleed. I shall definitely try and take Daffodil's advice and remember the good times with old friends and make lots of new memories with those that stuck around.
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