Cal Posted May 22, 2008 Share Posted May 22, 2008 Hello, Just wondering what it was like for you the first time you had to do something that occured when you suffered your SAH. Jim is back to work part time and has not done much phyiscally. His boss told him today that he did not care if he continued working part time but wanted him to do some work that required being on a ladder and lifting above his head to pull wires for computers. His SAH occured when he was on a ladder in the yard trimming a tree. I can see the anxiety in him when he told me he had to do this. I am hoping he will be fine. I am sure that once he does this he will get over his fear of this happening again. Sometimes I feel we live always not knowing if it will occur again. Thanks, and stay well! Cal XXXX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 Hi there Cal well mine happened whilst I was walking down my moms street, the first few times I did it after I felt sick and panicky however now I don't really think about it, I will occasionally think oh thats where I collapsed but it doesn't scare me anymore. However I am not sure I would be able to go up a ladder if that s where mine had happened because Jim also had the added danger of falling tell Jim to tell his boss he will do it when he is good and ready he cannot be rushed. Jess.xxxx He will be able to do it again one day but like I say rushing him is no good it will make him worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tennissmithy Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 Cal, Mine was using the computer at the same time as Simon had left for a weeks holiday. I am ok now using the computer when Simon is here but sometimes if he is away for work then I did and sonetimes still do get panicky. It has helped though that I have find this site as now if Simon is not here I am usually coming on here to see what what friends have been doing,so it has got easier. I must say I would not even climb a ladder now, what with the dizzy spells etc, there would be no way in the world. I think that is a bit unreasonable of Jims boss to say that. hes not the one thats been in a stressful situation. Jim can't be rushed he needsto try it in his own time. Laura xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 Hi Cal I was just walking up my drive, nearly at my front door, when mine happened , without any warning at all, thank Goodness my husband was in and heard me bang against the door. It does scare me sometimes when I think how it just came out of nowhere, and I certainly would not go up a ladder, because of my balance. I can understand Jims anxiety, and agree with Laura and Jess, Jim should do that when he feels good and ready.I wish you both well. Love Tinaxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shanti Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 Hi Cal Not too sure what started mine, but walking into the bough of a tree about 6 months prior to the SAH surely didn't help! Also the dizzy spells before washing my hair over the bath contributed to the first SAH, second one after going to the opticians and him shining bright lights behind my eyes. When I look back for quite a while (years?) I've felt dizzy when going up a ladder or standing on a stool reaching up for something, so perhaps it isn't a good idea that Jim is being asked to do this. Surely if he gets dizzy and falls he could have another SAH. What is his boss thinking of?! Is it a large organisation? Can Jim not discuss this with their health and safety advisor? He's survived a SAH, I wouldn't let anyone put me into a dangerous position that might bring on another one. Sorry, feel a bit cross about this Hugs Lesley xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 I doubt Jim will have another SAH if he stands on a ladder, while saying that maybe not a good idea if he's dizzy, balance effected..... Mines happened either in the kitchen or livingroom in the kitchen I told Ronnie I had pins & needles then in the livingroom I just colapsed, I dont remember any of it, for me its a good thing and a bad thing I have no memory at all - what-so-ever of anything.....but I'd say it was years coming on me.... Louise.xx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myratas Posted May 23, 2008 Share Posted May 23, 2008 I think it's wrong of Jim's boss has asked him to climb a ladder for his work, thank god we survived SAH but we still have to live with what happened to us and we value, and should do our health and well being both physically and mentally. I first started getting headaches around 2.00am woke up rather shocked, i know it was so gloomy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 Hi Cal, My 2nd SAH happened after a bout of flu and it's only now, that sneezing doesn't put the fear of God up me...... I would imagine that Jim has lost a bit of confidence and post traumatic stress isn't unusual post SAH ..... it will probably take a while to re-build that confidence and if Jim doesn't feel comfortable about going up a ladder or has balance issues, then he needs to say "no" and do what's good for him. As Louise has said, I doubt that he would have another SAH by going up a ladder, but I would imagine that the thought of it, takes him out of his comfort zone and yours too. My warning bleed and this SAH were totally different in the way that they were brought on...... my first one, was when I was on the computer and working from home and the 2nd started after influenza.... A few people on this website, have experienced a SAH after orgasm, I also believe that straining on the toilet can bring it on .... as can any rise in blood pressure... I really feel, that it's only with time, that you can start to re-build your confidence and there isn't a time scale ... Jim needs to do what's good for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil13 Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 Hi Cal, It does seem quite insensitive of Jim's boss to ask him to work up the ladder in view of his SAH - and from what you've said his boss comes across quite cold and callous. It's not like Jim's been off work with a broken arm!! Mind you, my brother went back to work ASAP after a liver transplant - I sometimes wonder whether it was because he feared he would be replaced. Maybe his boss needs to be filled in on exactly what an SAH is, and the complications that can manifest during recovery. You are both in my thoughts... Phil xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil13 Posted May 26, 2008 Share Posted May 26, 2008 A few people on this website, have experienced a SAH after orgasm, I also believe that straining on the toilet can bring it on .... as can any rise in blood pressure... I'm sorry Karen, but Sharon would be p*****g herself laughing at this part - it was just her personality! I'll go now...sorry. You really have really been through the mill, and your husband - I really can't imagine the struggle you've both had. My heart goes out to you. Sorry, for my sense of humour ...and Sharon's. Take care. Phil xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne Fleming Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 I was sitting on the loo when my SAH happened. It was weeks before I used the loo again as had a catheter in hospital but I remember I was a bit nervous the first time I used a toilet again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bogbrush Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Same here, but I was standing and it was the middle of the night. Every time I have to get up in the night, I think about what happened. It seems as I get older, I have to get up more often in the night. Regards Keith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Glad that it gave you a good giggle Phil! Anne/Keith, I would imagine that's why us SAH'ers are also given laxatives for quite a while........ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil13 Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 I do think that sometimes this kind of humour is a defense mechanism. But speaking as the 'other half' of someone who has had an SAH, I've found that whenever I hear of someone complaining of regular headaches, I tend to become very, very concerned, and without causing a panic, steer them towards asking their doctor for a scan. This may be over-reaction on my part in view of what happened to Sharon, but if it helps someone then so be it. Phil xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Hi Phil I agree with you, my best friend gets regular headaches, and like you say you dont want to panic anyone, but I have suggested the Dr, and a scan, I think it is an automatic reaction, after going through it I certainly would want to try and stop it from happening to anyone else if it didnt have to, same as you, with Sharon. Take care Love to both of you and your family Tinaxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Phil, there's nothing wrong with a bit of humour ....... if I didn't have a sense of humour and see the funny side of things, I don't think that I would be here to tell the tale or be able to run this website! ...... People find humour in the most sombre of circumstances ..... I've heard many stories .... and, my Sis-in-law's Dad died on the loo .....which she found humorous ..... and whether people like it or not that's fact and many of us deal with things by laughing at it ... it may not be PC, but that's the way that some of us are .... just because you have or have had a major illness, doesn't mean to say that you can't laugh .... we're still the same person as we were... My kids, the cheeky bug***'s still call me brain damaged, when I'm having a bit of a "d'oh" time...and I have many! ...... do I mind, nope I don't ..... I just laugh, they laugh at me and then I give them a quick clip around the ear and remind them how well off they are and that they can leave home if they want!..... It's all done in a good humoured way ..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil13 Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Spot on there, Karen. I think you either see the funny side or you go insane! Unfortunately, some people can't appreciate what I would term as 'gallows' humour. I was telling a friend of mine about Sharon's progress and he caught me completely off guard with, 'Oh, I think she deserves a good slap lying there all day getting off 'scot' free!'. I nearly burst my sides laughing!! She would too. Laughter is good for the soul... Phil xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bogbrush Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Hi Phil That's what I like about this site. We can all have a good laugh and I try to foster that. I'm sure Karen will agree with me when I say that most on here have a brilliant sense of humour. If I can make one person smile or laugh, then I feel I've made a difference. I know that humour helped get me through the dark days following my SAH. Regards Keith Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Phil/Keith, Phil, I would have laughed too ..... even if I had been lying in bed after a SAH...... I might have given him a friendly slap though! Finding humour is part and parcel of recovery and you know that you're beginning to find some sense of normality, when people feel free to have laugh and joke around you. Keith, I've always enjoyed your light hearted banter and will continue to do so ..... think that you're right and most folk on here are pretty normal and enjoy a laugh ..... unless they tell me different! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phil13 Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Karen/Keith, At Christmas, the nursing home have Christmas Carol singing, which this time the head nurse Minimol contributed a song from India. She was telling me that, unfortunately, Sharon threw up in the middle of it, to which I replied, 'Do you think it was the quality of the singing?' I received a slap across the arm... Phil xxx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cal Posted May 27, 2008 Author Share Posted May 27, 2008 I totally agree about having the ability to laugh. Jim often asks me if I am the one that suffered brain damage instead of him when I do something silly. We have a bush in the yard that is called a Rose of Sharon. He stated to me the other day "The Rosa Mary looks great! We both laughed so hard because last year he knew the exact name and now once again does. We laugh often and love much, not so much physically but with our hearts, it is truly a good thing. And Karen, I agree completly about Keith's humor. Love it! Stay well. Cal XXXX Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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