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Loss of motivation post SAH


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So since my SAH, I can't find the motivation to do anything. I am worried that if I visit my family doc, he will just put me on anti-depressant when I am certainly not depressed. I am just lazy. Anyone else find it hard to do anything in the day? And how did you get over it?

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Hi there yes I was terrible when I had mine but to sort myself out I had two kids lol. Not alot of help I know but if you have kids you have to look after them don't you. Jess.xxx Oh and I returned to work two months after my second op.

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Hi Linda

Know exactly how you feel I joined a gym last June and up until xmas made myself go at least 3 times a week but so far this year I have not managed as much. I find that most days when I finish work I just feel to tired but I am going to have to force myself as I do usually feel better a lot better after going and definitely not quite as podgy/stodgy :lol::lol::lol:

Janet x

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Hi there :)

I seem to be to be completely the other way, I cant sit down, get really really tired, but get so frustrated I cant do things, it makes me try even harder. Dont know why, always been one to rush around like a headless chicken,and very determind. My family are always telling me off for doing to much, and when I get bad heads etc, I have learnt to listen to my body. and have to rest up. Just so very frustrated. Hope you feel better soon, take care, lots of love Tinaxx

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Hi everyone

I'm a bit like Tina: a headless chicken :roll:

I have learnt to slow down a bit though. And after one particular scare when I made myself really ill, I've stopped being really stupid and doing absolutely too much. I get dizzy when I get to the that's enough mark, so I stop immediately or at least slow down.

The whole house needs the walls washing down and re emulsioning but unless I get someone to do the ceilings and tops of the walls, as I daren't stand on a stool or ladders or anything, and I just do the bottom of the walls, it just isn't going to get done. Maybe next year.

Big hugs

Lesley xxx

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Loss of motivation post SAH seems to be quite common ...... I'm still very easily distracted, but thankfully, my motivation is starting to return....I'm nearly three years post SAH ..... my short term memory has improved, but it is still fairly bad though and I can walk into another room and completely forget what I was going to do or what I was doing, I still have to write lists and leave post-it notes around the house .....I think that I'm getting used to being a bit of an "air head".... :) If you're suffering from lack of motivation and you're very early on with your recovery, then may be, it's your brain telling you to take it easy and just do what you need to do ..... be kind to yourself and let your brain heal .... I still haven't finished the painting in my kitchen and I started it weeks ago ..... !

Linda, I think that it's only with time, that your motivation starts to return ..... xx

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I agree Karen ....

Even though i am early in my recovery i HAVE to do the washing and drying and just swapping them over makes me tired...

I tryto do things round the flat but rest between..... i'm only doing bits...

I cant put anymore weight on :lol:

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest wayne

hi,

i to have lost motivation, its 14 months since my sah, and now i feel about 98 %. but there's that certain part of me that just can't be bothered. works fine and time seeing my friends is good, but live seems to have stalled.

in the months after the operation, i really wanted to live a fufilled lived, as we only get one chance here.

but it feels now that everyone can't see i have any problems, only little ones, but niggly all the same,

wayne :)

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Hi Wayne

Oh dear, join the club! Where people around us think everything is now okay with us because we look okay. I've been really down about that particular subject all weekend. Watched a teary DVD on Friday night and realised that people who got in touch last Xmas with me, were filled in about the seriousness of what had just happened to me, expressed all these oh dears etc, and most of them have never phoned back since! These are people I thought were close friends. These are people who in the past I've held some of their hands for months on end whilst they we're going through stuff of their own. :roll:

Big learning curve.

Sometimes I wonder if I really knew some of them. Only a very few people have been there for me. I think in the final analysis: some people I thought of as close friends, were actually social friends and that when I could no longer join in certain social activities with them, they disappeared (out of sight, out of mind?). Don't worry anyone on here though, I've got my head around it and have bounced back up this morning. Just life isn't it - sometimes.

Re life having stalled. Know that feeling too. Because I'm not working at the moment, feel like everyone has gone off to a party I wasn't invited too. And it is hard to get motivated when you've got days ahead of you without anything definite planned. But I am getting better at that, though do have the odd day when I just can't be bothered. Think it helps that I've got the house to run, that keeps me reasonably busy and focused.

Big hug

Lesley xxx

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  • 2 months later...

HI!

This one and the previous topic are really interesting. My memory is not what is was but someone on the website mentioned that if my relationships were not strong before SAH they didn´t stand much of a chance after it. I spoke with my "man" (how difficult to define a relationship when it doesn´t fit a stereotype) last weekend and I have to admit that since SAH I have been sort of pushing him away. That's his perception and he is right in some things. I think that it´s easier for me to push him away than to risk seeing him unable to cope. I´m just trying to come to terms with it myself after 4 months. Most people have mentioned I have changed after the episode and I guess some will like the change and others won´t. The only thing I know for sure is that I am not willing to "pretend" I am the same person because I am not. Many times I prefer myself now, it depends on the day and how tired I have let myself become!

Last night I got a phone call from a man I met months ago in the hospital. His wife had undergone similar surgery to mine a month later than me and he was really concerned about her evolution. Well, he said yesterday that she wasn´t "recovering" as he had expected, she was depressed and did nothing most days and he couldn´t cope with it. It saddened me that neither he or his wife can benefit from this website but I did try to pass on all that I have learned. I also spoke to her but I can already see the expectations of others are making it really hard for her. We plan to continue in contact.

I have noticed that some people are afraid of me just because they are afraid of death and I must remind them of it. They ask questions but I see in their eyes that their real motivation isn´t concern but rather fear that it could happen to them. They cannot deal with it and I have to let them go without resentment. I have always been a very perceptive person but this blessing/curse seems to have increased after my aneurysm.

It is true that one gets to know people better after something like the SAH. I just hope that I can be better with other people when they have problems now. It works both ways. The people who have helped me have also shown me how to help others.

This website is great. I am more in love with it each day!

Lots of love

Nurianna

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Hi there

I certainly found after my SAH that I wasn't so quick to judge and was probably more compassionate. I've always been the kind of person that would puch my problems to one side if a friend came to me with their problem. I still do but now I also realise that I need to deal with my problems too.

I prefer the person I am now in many respects to the old me, but there are days when I still resent that I can't do the things that I used to be able to do, the way I used to do them. I have adapted in many areas but there is still some frustration as it's more a mental problem than a phyiscal one.

I've been lucky in the friend department - they've all been very patient and understanding and are still friends now.

I hope that your relationship turns out the way you truly want it to - the thing with being a survivor is that you realise what is truly important in life.

Wishing you all the best

Love Sami xxx

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