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Ash
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Hiya...

I am joining this forum because yesterday my mother suffered a subarachnoid haemorrhage/aneurysm and underwent a coiling procedure. She is 66, a non-smoker, led an active lifestyle and was teetotal.

As you can imagine we are all desperately worried and very scared and so after discovering this forum i thought i'd join and say hello. I would love to hear any advice or support or anything at all that may help. Any responses or replies will be very gratefully received :) I'll try to get back to anyone as fast as i can..

Many thanks and best wishes to all.

Ash.

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hi ash

im sorry about your mum but the only thing i can suggest is to take one day at a time your brain is going to be all over the place and you are not going to be able to think straight for a few days yet things wont make sense until then and your going to have so many questions to ask and they will rattle around in your head hopefully mum will come round without major problems and you will be able to talk to her in the mean time hold her hands talk to her remind her that she is loved and wanted and tell her to pull her socks up and get better soon you are going to be all over the place someone here will always know and be there for you for support and if you want to ramble then do so its good also try and write a diary so that the missing days can be read by mum when she is more able to take things in chin up and remember this site is here for you take care and please keep us informed on mums progress and yours

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Hi Ash :) a very warm welcome to BTG...so sorry to hear about your Mum. You have come to the right place for support and advice. Good advice from Paul, cant add much apart from remember to take care of yourself to and look forward to hearing more from you xx

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Hi Ash

Firstly i am sorry about whats happend to your mum.

She will be in the best hands, with doctors and nurses that will give her all the care that she needs

You must also look after yourselves, yous will all need all your strength and energy for your mum

I too suffered 2 SAH's and i know only too well,the worry for loved ones

But you will find the strength to get through this,

You will find a wealth of info on this site, from lovely people ,who themselves or loved ones have been affected by Stroke/sah's and many other things

The online support is amazing

Dont be afraid to ask any questions,or any thing no matter how small

There will always be someone on here who will be able to give you reassurance or advice

You take care and best wishes for your mum

xx

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:redface:Hi Ash sorry things are like they are at the moment and hope with all of my heart that your mum makes a good recovery. Like all the others have said you need to remember to look after yourself, eat regular, drink plenty water and rest in between visits to your mum. Have some post its and a pen in your pocket constantly to write down any questions as you think of them so you won't forget.I was up and down for the first two weeks and my daughters didn't know from one day to the next what to expect. But with their love and support and great medical care I came back to them. Never give up hope.Maggiex

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Hi Ash

Sorry to hear about your mum. I too agree with Paul about keeping a diary. I remember most things about when I had my SAH but I know that people struggle later on when they don't remember. I do remember the fear and pain I saw in my childrens faces. My youngest son took 3 days to pluck up the courage to come and see me (but that was ok as I knew he would be scared to see all the tubes etc) and really struggled with things even after I was home and making a good recovery. But the other two had left home by this time and he later told me that he was terrfified it would happen again when it was only he that was around.

I would also suggest that you write down any questions you have and ask to speak to your mum's consultant because it's too easy to forget things when speaking with the medics.

Take care

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Hi Ash

Welcome to this site, sorry to hear about your mum, she needs your support and time to recover. You also need to focus on yourself too. We are all all here for you when you need some advice or just a friendly chat.

Take care.

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Hi Ash and welcome, sorry to hear about your mum, it's a worrying time for everyone as we all know, it is a long old road for many, but some people make remarkable recoveries, I hope your mums recovery runs very smoothly and thing start to improve very quickly, Best wishes to you and your mum Rod

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Hi Ash

Welcome to the site.

I hope you're mum is doing well.

The diary idea is a good one - as you can note down any questions you have and also make notes of the answers you get from the consultants/doctors you and your family speak to.

Take care

Kel

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Hi everyone..

Thanks for all you who have replied it really is nice to read words of comfort. My mum was taken off sedation today and the doctors are now saying they have to wait till she wakes. It's been around 14 hours now and she has yet to come round so the wait is agonising but we're trying to stay positive. I don't know how fast people come round after being sedated but the doctors say it will vary from person to person. They are saying after 24 hours they would do a CT scan but obviously the longer she takes to wake the more worried we become. We're all waiting and very nervous but trying to stay positive and hope she can pull through. Sorry i haven''t replied to all individually but i am comforted by all your kind words and i'm trying to get some sleep and eat a little.. Hopefully the next 24 hours bring some better news...Thank you all again so much.

Ash.

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ash

it can take a few days for mum to come round lin took quite a while the brain has suffered a major injury and even when the sedatives wear off it could take more than a week for the brain to start recovering and mum to come round, hopefully it would be sooner but its up to mum now to recover as quickly as she can just hold her hands talk to her even take in a portable cd player for when no one is there playing her favorite tunes the staff will change the record when its needed so that mum is not left alone as such but also it will encourage mum to respond take one day at a time rest when you can and i know thats not easy but try and get some me time will pm my number should you wish to chat take care and best wishes

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Hi Ash,

I know it will be a very anxious time for you - I realise that when you last posted, your Mum had not woken as yet, but her brain needs to rest and recover. I wish you and your Mum all the best over the coming days and beyond. You are doing the right thing by remaining positive which unfortunately can be a drain on your resourses, so don't forget to look after yourself.

Take Care,

Sarah

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Hi..well we're all trying to talk to her while we're there and be positive. She's on antibiotics at the moment and it's 36 hours after the sedation was stopped. Her eyes opened a little today and they open when she coughs but she's not awake yet. They didn't have to do another CT scan though i suppose that's a good thing. It's hard seeing like this when just last weekend she was up about and busy as usual. Trying to eat and look after myself as everyone is advising and i think it's about taking every day/hour at a time.. I do have moments of real fear though but i try and put them out of my head as quick as possible and reading some of the stories on here is comforting. ..Hope your all doing ok..Ash

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ash

you have my number and i have replied to your mail when you do get like that use the number anytime and i mean anytime you are doing exactly what i did when lin went down by posting here it helps i know it did in the beginning and it still does take care and one day at a time

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Ash

I am a new member to this site and have found it to be soooooo helpful! I am sorry for your mom's condition and that you, too, are experiencing this. Many prayers and healing thoughts go out to you both!

My 24 yr. old daughter stayed at the hospital w/me and refused to leave. She was terrified and very concerned of what might happen if she left. It is a very scary time for all involved and you are doing well to post on this site. The good people here and their encouraging words have helped me tremendously - you're not alone in this.

In the mean time, do try and get some rest and take care of yourself! My heart goes out to you and your mom.

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Ash my heartgoes out to you and your family,keep positive. Don't expect too much when mum comes around it does take time. Like you my daughters were terrified too its only natural but do try to hold onto the thoughts that mum will be ok and when she comes around don't expect too much it takes time.Maggiex

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Hi Ash

Welcome to the site - really sorry about your mum but glad that you found us for support.

For about a week after my op I was in and out of consciousness - the brain can only heal when the body is doing the minimal it needs to keep you alive. The Docs right, everyone is different and the healing process will vary from person to person.

Paul's idea of a diary is an excellent one - write down questions and your mum's improvement from day to day - it'll help you and her when she comes round and you can show her when she feels she's not making any progress. Its the little steps that lead to huge jumps.

Keep yourself strong and healthy too.

We're all here anytime you need to ask something or just need reassurance.

Sending love to you, your mum and family.

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Just popping in quickly to say hi and welcome! Hang in there :) And remember, your mum is in there somewhere - don't hesitate to talk to her and connect with her even if you feel she doesn't know you are there or doesn't know who you are.

Take care and I hope mum makes a good recovery. Remember we are here, and you can ask us anything! Make sure you get some rest. Best wishes x

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Hi all.. Thanks to all who are posting it's very comforting to read so many kind words from those who know what this is like. Well today mum did have another CT scan but after the doctor said the results were ok and there was no deterioration. It's a bit difficult to remember the exact medical terms they use but she did say it was a grade 4 or 5 bleed which is a very bad one and it's still very early days in any recovery process. Her main concern now was minimising the risk of vasospasm which she's doing. I felt my mum was a tiny better today there was a little more eye movement and the cough seems to have eased a little.

Basically the doctor said it's going to be a very long slow road and we have to be patient. There's no real way of knowing exactly what will happen but trying to be positive is the main thing. Today one of my mum's friends popped in with a card , which was nice. My sister really wants to keep visitors to a minimum as she's worried about them seeing mum like this..i don't know, i just want anything to make her better. My mum has dozens of friends who would probably come but it's only 2 at a time to be around her so with my, my sister and my dad there all the time there's no real room for too many others.

I just wonder how you all felt about visitors outside of immediate family ?

Many thanks to all again reading through the messages really is helping a lot. Hopefully i'll get to know a bit more about some of the amazing people here :)

Best wishes to all.

Ash

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ash

im pleased you have seen a little tiny improvement and boy its going to be a long haul yes i know what you mean things you are told only half goes in the rest flow straight back out again its nice friends are popping in i had a couple who popped in and being in itu and the intensity of the room it gave me a break and i got some fresh air recharged then went back in it may do mum some good if other people go in to see her because a new voice will stimulate mum and hopefully make her want to fight through the fog she is in now and wake up it wont be long before she will be moved to a more open ward from itu to hdu then ward im worried about your dad and sister being there ALL the time even though i did the same they must have a break to recharge their batteries hence let other people pop in i hope your using the restaurant at the hospital because i know how flipping expensive it is in that area it might be a good idea if dad and your sister logged onto this site it may very well help them come to terms with what has happened if dad wants to talk give him my number or your sister im more than willing to try and help take care chin up one day at a time

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Hi Ash

I can understand your sister and Dad not wanting to leave your mum's bedside, but I agree with Paul. They need a break too and knowing that someone is still with her while they're getting some air or just having a walk should make it easier for them. A fresh voice would definitely make a difference.

I was hundreds of miles away from home when I had my SAH so my friends couldn't visit anyway, but had I bee nearer home they would have done and I would have liked it - even though I was in and out of consciousness for days and couldn't remember who'd been afterwards lol.

It will be a long road to recovery (and I always say this because its true), but your Mum is allowed to make as many pit stops along the way as she likes.

Stay positive, so far the news has been good post SAH really - she's done the hardest part by surviving - with love, support, patience and understanding she'll get there.

I'm sure I speak for everyone on Behind the Gray when I say send your Mum our best wishes and love.

Take care of you too Ash.#

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Hi guys.. Well today when i went in i got a real fright as mum's head was oozing blood and it had leaked onto the pillow so it looked a bit messy. The doctor was consulted and apparently it's the aspirin that thins her blood which is causing it to ooze out a little from just around the drain one her head. They said they might give her some platelets in the blood if it continues but it was rather scary. Felt better after it was dressed again and looked cleaner. It's one of those things that happens, it's a rocky road ahead and as Skippy said, there are many pit stops on the way. The vasospasm is now the biggest concern and there giving her drugs for that as well. She's still coughing but the nurse, who is a really lovely lady, said the chest was a bit clearer than before. Actually all the nurses and doctors have been really nice and we're lucky i guess mum is in the best hospital we could have her in.

The nurse today was saying mum was very tired today and she did look sleepy for a lot of the day. I just feel so sad for her being like this when barely 5 days ago she was full of life and energy. It seems so cruel

BTW i didn't mean my sister and dad are there ALL the time it was just the way it came across. i'm actually there more than they are it's just that one of the 3 of us has been there from 9-10 pm and so as it's only 2 by the bed there's not room for all of us at once so we just rotate.

Actually today for the first time since it happened my dad didn't come in so it was me and my sister. I do feel tired but more mentally than physically but i'm trying to eat regularly and get my sleep in. I do use the hospital canteen but that's a bit pricey, so we're thinking of taking our own food in to eat. We're obviously going to be here a while but being patient and positive is all we can do. Hope all of you are doing well and thanks for your good wishes... Ash

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ash

a very little blood goes a very long way especially from the head so please try not to worry its normal to give aspirin mum will also be on an anticoagulant as well the keep the blood thin i do think queens is top notch as well mum will get tired and a chest infection can cause problems but mum coughing is getting it off her chest so a good way to keep going mum will change from day to day and it will be better when they move her to a normal ward wheres theres so much stimulation for her im glad dad a rest although he wasn't there his mind would have been yes the mental side is the more draining i still get so mentally tired even now but thats with the traveling to and from the home don't they have a little coffee room which you can use they used to have a room for family whose relatives could used to get a cuppa which was free and just be near itu things may have changed ash its one day at a time and its so ****** frustrating !!!!!! chin up regards to all

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