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3 Years since SAH


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Hi Everyone,

Well it`s here my 3rd Anni-versary and it`s been a bit of a difficult year with one thing and another,

 

I feel like I took a bit of a step back in my recovery this year, mainly to do with stress and the not coping with it,

My mum`s illness progressed quite rapidly and my family were putting a lot of pressure on me to spend more time at home.

The feeling guilty for not being there was hard even though it was my doctor advice to " Step Away " for the sake of my own health,

my family just didn't get it, they were seeing it as me not caring about my mum, they couldn't have been more wrong.

 

I think the things that have gone on with Verdun on a personal level have really knocked my confidence,

but I will bounce back from this I am sure.

 

Last year I think my biggest achievement was raising over £1,ooo for Northwest Air Ambulance, doing it alone I was really proud of that,

also making my friends 3 tier cake this year was great as I hadn't  managed to do that since before SAH,

so at least I had a couple of positives.

 

BTG seems to be the only good thing in my life at the moment, this site has been my sanctuary and the people on it my saviours over the last 3 years

and I am so very grateful for being able to come here and share my ups and downs ( I know mostly down, miserable woman ) without being judged

I know for a fact I wouldn't be where I am today without you all, so Thank You all so much for all of the love, kindness and support that you have all

given me, for the laughter you have brought into my life,

 

I`m looking forward to the next 12 months, cant wait to see what it brings:)

Love You All Dearly

Michelle xx

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Happy 3rd Anni-versary Michelle :)

 

 

Huge respect for you lovely lady, for all that you have achieved and coped with over the last 3 years bless you xx

Be very proud of how far you have come and thank you for all your caring supportive posts to others, even when going through such difficult times yourself.

 

I wish you all that you wish for and more Michelle.

 

Take care

Love Tina xx

 

 

 

 

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Michelle, well done on three years post SAH.

 

Thanks for being such an active member of BTG both in the GR and in helping others with your posts.

 

I think we all have a very clear picture of life at the caravan and Verdun`s fishing trips, and wish we were around as you share out these lovely cakes.

Wishing you well as you settle in to your new home.

 

2 hours ago, Chelle C said:

I`m looking forward to the next 12 months, cant wait to see what it brings:)

 

With so much happening in your life in the past twelve months .....great to read that this is your positive attitude to the future.

 

Subs

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Michelle, when I met you for the first time last year, I was 1yr post Sah and you were 2yr. You gave me enormous inspiration and the courage to carry on along this horrible bumpy road that we all have to  travel . For that I am eternally thankful.You are a very strong lady to whom I aspire

can't wait to see you next week?

Love Jan xx

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Michelle,

 

It has been so nice to get to know you since I joined.  Congrats on 3 years.  I know you have some challenges, but as stated above by Subs, it is great to see the positive attitude toward the future.  I send you best wishes for every year being better than the one before.

 

Chris

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Congratulations on making the 3 year mark!  I know it has been a tough road for you Michelle, and I think you have been holding up admirably. It takes a lot of grit to hold together when our parents are aging, especially when it takes so much strength just to keep ourselves on even keel.  You are doing better than most! Your family and friends are blessed to have you and surely this next year will bring good things to you.

 

Love, Colleen

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Apologies for my late response Michelle. Another anniversary to be proud of, a year that has had many ups and downs along the way.  I've always said that recoving from a sah is hard enough, but the stresses and strains of life are so much harder to deal with during this process. 

Like Colleen said, you have held up admirably when faced with these challenges and I'm sure you will find the strength to continue the excellent support you provide to your parents. 

 

It's a pleasure to read your posts in the green room which bring a lovely ambience to the place.

Enjoy your time with Jan this week - I'm sure you'll both have a lovely time,

 

Love, Sarah

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Apologies here too sorry its late...

 

Michelle you should be proud honey apart from the SAH lift flings some curve balls at us you get on with it..

 

I have been greatful for your comments on my Aunt & Uncle stuff...

 

take care.

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Hey Michelle,

 

Congratulations on reaching three years - well done!

 

We've just suffered a bereavement also which is why I haven't been on site lately.

 

However, when my own mother passed some years ago, she had been suffering the onset of Alzheimer's.  I felt a mixture of guilt and relief.  Guilt because you automatically think 'could I have done more?'  The reality is probably a little bit, but not enough to make a significant difference or affect the outcome.  I also felt guilty at feeling relief!  Relief because, although sad for myself, her suffering was over and I was saying goodbye to her body, not her mind, because in many ways that had already gone.  It was pitiful to watch her, helpless and trapped within herself, and me powerless to help her be well again.

 

It was probably the saddest time of my life until this last one, which was the passing of my stepdaughter on 28th May at the age of just 34, after a short illness, in hospital.

 

She was an organ donor, and we also raised over £1000 for a well known charity that sends terminally ill and sick children on holiday.

 

We, like you do, have to move on now, which won't be easy.  Don't beat yourself up, you can only help people from a position of strength. You did the right thing for your own health.  You would only have dragged yourself down and surely the others should have recognised that they should have stepped up to the plate a little more, instead of criticising and trying to cast blame onto anyone but themselves.

 

Look in the mirror Michelle and hold your head up - you did what you could - can they truly say the same?

 

The only way is up - go for it, enjoy life and grab those opportunities - life ain't a rehearsal.

 

Macca

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Sorry I missed this but hope the day went well and you celebrated your SAH survival.  Life is hard when you have parents or relatives that need care, guilt never leaves you and there is often a conflict between what is best for you and the person you care for.  I often have this caring for my mum but need escape to recharge and carry on.  My mum is not too bad but little by little I see her diminish.  There will  not be a right or wrong in what you decide but go with what feels right to you and your health xX

 

 

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Thanks Colleen, Sarah,Sami & Mecca

Your words mean a lot.

 

Macca I am deeply sorry for your loss

Life is so cruel at times.

Your stepdaughter did a wonderful thing being an organ donor, 

And I'm sure she would be very proud that you raised so much money for the children's charity.

I'm sending you a massive hug. X

 

Love

Michelle xx 

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Thanks Michelle,

 

Life has to go on and the best way to celebrate the lives of those who have passed, is to live your own life to the full as they would have wanted you to.  So enjoy it, fill it with smiles, and laughter, and love.  Yes, there are sad times that weigh heavily on our minds at times, but the good times also need to be celebrated and hopefully there will be more of them than sad.

 

Raise a glass to your Mum, Michelle and then have a great time - and thanks for your kind words also!

 

Good luck,

 

Macca

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