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Scared for my husband


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3 weeks ago my husband suddenly developed a blinding headache. He saw 3 docs and they all said migraines. On 18th March I found he on the floor unwell in the toilet. he is now in North Staffs Royal Infirmary after suffering a subarachnoid haemorrhage. He underwent surgery on the 19th to coil the aneurism and surgery to remove the blood clot. They have left his skull open for now and he is currently sedated and on ventilator as he has a chest infection. He has paralysis on his left side so until he wakes we don;t know to what extent. Just so scared for the future.

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Hi Zoe,

i am so sorry to hear your news it must have been so frightening for you. All i can say is it is very early days and from experience you have to go along with the surgeons advice and just let them do their job. brain surgery has come on a long way and i am sure everything possible is being done to help the brain recover. lots of people are either kept sedated or are unconcious for a fair while to allow the brain to adapt to the changes. keep us informed and if you need to talk to someone i and many others are here for you please let us know.

take care god bless you both

caz x

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Hi Zoe, and welcome to btg,sorry to hear about your husband, My wlfe had an sah 12 months ago this saturday she had 2 aneurysms 1 coiled and 1 clipped and all the complications along the way, but the doctors are very good and they do their job well, i know exactly how worried you are this is the most awfull time for you, and i'm sure just like the rest of us you feel totaly helpless, nothing happens quick enough but hang on in there and stay strong, don't neglect yourself, and please let us know how he's doing , Best wishes to you both Rod

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I am sorry to hear about your husband. Please try not to worry too much, although I know that's easier said than done. It is such early days for you both. Your husband is in the best place, where he will be closely monitored. I was a sufferer of a sah, but I would imagine it is almost worse to be the partner of someone who has gone through it. I know every minute probably seems like an hour at the moment, but I think being patient is really the only thing to be at the moment.

Just try and take each day as it comes - our minds have a habit of thinking further on than perhaps we should. If you can possibly concentrate on the present time and just be there for him when you can. The recovery process varies with each individual and timescales also vary so much- I think as long as you are aware that it may take some time, then you will be better prepared . My only other suggestion would be for you to make sure you get plenty of rest yourself and accept any help/support from friends/family - it won't be an easy time for you, but do not hesitate to ask any questions on here - as there is usually someone able to give some good advice.

Best Wishes,

Sarah

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hi zoe

i know how you feel my lin was in the miu in august 2008 for about six weeks this is a nightmare no one wants and there is very little support from staff as i have said before stay strong did my head in is hubby under simon shaw or bryant dr dias looked after lin then simon took over

lin was kept asleep for two weeks before they woke her up so he is in a good place the staff there are brilliant what i did one of the sisters gave me a blank book as a diary and i put things in it as i sat with lin i spent hours there and put everything in i saw and how i felt so that i could either read to her later or she could read herself when she recovered lins skull is still open they tucked in her tummy for safe keeping with a view to replace it down the line they might if they haven't done it is to put a traci in hubby throat so they can take the tube out of his mouth but this is a good thing and makes him more normal to look at because it allows him to be cleaned out if he has an chest infection and helps him and the staff to manage his airway

these next few weeks will be a drain on you and a massive roller coaster ride for you and your family i know ive been there i will pm you my number if you get stuck or need someone to talk you use it please its a busy unit but the staff are brilliant i hope you found the kitchen and tea making area use it and try and take time out for yourself please and take one day at a time please i have my fingers crossed for you both and your family did the hospital give you this site just out of interest zoe please keep us up to date as things go along if you have the strength take care hugs and cuddles sweetheart

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Hi Zoe, sorry to hear about your husband. I was a patient in North Staffs for about seven weeks before christmas. I can safely say that I owe the staff my life, their dedication and care helped me to come through my SAH when the outlook was bleak and I was not expected to survive the experience.

I have no memory of about five weeks of my stay, I was on a ventilator and like your husband had an annurysm coiled. It is a traumatic shock for our bodies but he is in the best place being looked after by people who are specialists in their field.

You will find everybody on the BTG site supportive. I hope your husbands condition improves, please let us know how he is doing.

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Hi Zoe :) a very warm welcome to BTG....so sorry to hear about your husband.....such a scary worrying time for you. So glad you have found us. You will find lots of info and get lots of support from everyone.....thinking of you, please try and rest up to. Take care, love Tina xx

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Hi Zoe.

I know that this is a worrying time for you.

My SAH left me with some left sided paralysis. But with lots of physio and encouragement I was almost back to normal after a couple of months.

Your husband is in the best place at the moment and you are doing the best thing for him. You have found a great source of help, advice and support here at BTG.

As Tina said, take care & get some rest.

My thoughts are with you.

Ern

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Hi Zoe

A warm welcome to the site and so sorry to hear about your husband. As the others have already said he is in the best place and getting well cared for. It is a very worrying time for you at the moment so any questions please ask, we have quite a few carers on the site who have been in the same situation that you are in. Remember to try and take the some time out for yourself to rest difficult I know but your husband will need all your strength and support on his road to recovery.

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Hello Zoe, I'm so glad that you found us. Of course you are worried, anyone who cares would be, it sounds as though your husband is in the best hands. As others have said, these are very early days and his poor injured brain needs a rest which it is getting now, I'm sure that you will be amazed at the progress he will make and with your support I bet he does well. It's a long and tough road but the support here will help you both. Just ask if you want to know anything at all, no matter how trivial it may seem. If it's worrying then it isn't trivial. We will all be thinking of you both and looking forward to hearing about the progress:-D

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Hey there

Welcome to the site and so very sorry to hear about you husband. Good news that his infection is starting to clear, it means that his body can start healing properly now. At this time all he would want to do is sleep, so keeping him sedated is the best thing for him. I think it helps keep the blood pressure low too so that any swelling can be reduced.

Stay positive, he is in the best place. Any questions or reassurance you need, then feel free to ask as there's always someone here who would be able to comfort or has been through a similar experience.

Take care and sending you best wishes

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Welcome to the site Zoe, sorry to hear your news.

You are definitely in the right place here; wonderful people who give terrific support and keep you sane. When my husband suffered his SAH, it was such a relief to come on here and be able to communicate with people who really new what was happening.

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Welcome to the site Zoe

I hope your husband continues to make progress in his recovery, and that you manage to take time for rest too. It must be incredibly emotionally draining for you and you need to take care of yourself as well.

Best wishes for continued recovery

Kel x

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Richard has had a CT scan today - shows there is an area of his brain that has been starved of blood - whether or not it will recover is unknown but this is what is causing the paralysis. They said the brain is a very slow organ to recover from trauma so they tend to say a year after is when they know if things will improve any further. Still sedated and ventilated but tracheostomy not done today so maybe tomorrow. Chest infection is clearing - heard doctor mention pneumonia. Got really upset again today. Hard to see one of the most important people in your life in this position. His two passions in life ae his kids and football - he will fin it hard knowing he may not get to play football with his son.

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Hi Zoe, sorry to hear that things are still hard, watching my wife when she had her sah was the hardest time in my life that i can recall, and i felt so helpless, but hang in there,stay strong and as time progress you will have your bit to do, this will be a long job but you will find that it gets easier as time goes on, my wife is a year tomorrow, and looking back it's just flown, I really hope things start to improve soon for you both. Best wishes Rod

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zoe

don't give up yet the phyisos will work on Richard they don't give up yes the brain is slow in recovering but it does to some extent and don't write Richard off playing footy with the kids yet and he will be able to go to football match's i don't think he would mind not playing. being sedated is not a problem because it is helping him relaxed and not putting a strain on his body this is the roller coaster things change on a daily basis there are no two days the same honest you will have the ups and downs Richard may have ingested some fluid when he collapsed lin did but the phyisos got it all up so look forwards to Richard waking up he will be very drowsy because of what has happened chin up zoe and remember one day at a time and try and make sure you get some me time take care xx

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Hi Zoe,

Sorry to hear Richard is still not too well. Stay positive as like the others have said it takes time. Keep talking to him and ask others to do so too. I remember that is what kept me going after my sah. Every time i heard my sons speak i knew i had to keep alive for them and it gave me the drive to live. I dont know how old your son is but maybe he could record a few words for dad too. The only other thing i can say is that being unconcious or semi concious is very peaceful you feel floaty and as if you are in a warm bed so richard will not be in pain. Keep up your own strength as you will need it later take care and god bless you both zoe

best wishes

caz x

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Zoe, my heart goes out to you - it must be so distressing for you at the moment to see Richard like this, but don't despair, it really is early days. It is good to hear his chest infection is improving. I hope you have got someone close to you, perhaps a friend or family member so that you can talk things over with them, as dealing with this alone, especially having children, can be very difficult, upsetting and tiring. Keeping in touch on here, I'm sure will help in some way too - you are doing really well Zoe, like Paul said, chin up and take one day at a time.

Best wishes,

Sarah

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Hi Zoe,

Try to keep positive, it's very early days and I'm still experiencing recovery 5 years on. I don't think that the medics can give you a 100% answer as to brain recovery, as they really don't know and I've seen a fair few people on this site, that have made a much better recovery than predicted.

Hopefully, once Richard has managed to fight off the infection, you will start to see things picking up ... My children were certainly one of the key factors that kept me fighting for the future when I was in hospital ... Even though I didn't feel "all there" I knew that it was important to keep going and I had something to live for ..

Take care of yourself too ... xx

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