Guest mojojojo Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Oh Paul....You have nothing at all to feel bad about...... the fact is you both love each other dearly and its an expression of that love.... You must not feel bad about it as Karen has said it can happen at anytime. Makes me upset knowing how much you love her and how much you want to show her but can't. Your love for each other is amazing and i so so wish you had the chance to once again express it. God Bless Love Sharon xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Hi Paul You must not blame yourself......as the others have all said...happens at any time.....i had been laughing with friends and just walking back to my front door.....??? no warnings nothing! I really hope that Lin is alot better today.....you take care...thinking of you both...love Tina xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul99 Posted October 28, 2008 Author Share Posted October 28, 2008 hi everyone got in this morning it appears lin has thrush top and bottom end i didnt ask ???? womens problems but they are going to give her and injection to clear it up lin was with it for a little while untill the phyisos came in and decided to put her on a tilting table ??? it took them half an hour to get her onto it then i was asked to come behind the curtain LIN WAS STANDING UP WOW AFTER SO LONG THEY HAD MY DARLING STANDING UP ALTHOUGH STRAPED up to stop her collapseing and my tears came from nowhere to see her standing was too much i have waited so long for this day and by the look on her face terrified even though the phyios had explained what they were going to do untill she heard my voice and felt my hands carress her face i couldnt stop crying and best of all i got my first hug and deep cuddle in ages and talking to her and getting a tear from her eye i didnt want to let her go but her bp started to go down so they had to take her back down again slowly but i stayed with her and i was so moved by what they had done for lin i still cant believe its happened its to get her used to being upright after so long lying down and they will do it about three times a week to build her up and she was standing on her own two feet squarely although lin is still not with it the fact they have spent all that time for 5 mins standing beggers belief i cant praise them enough this has really pulled me and boosted me so so much just what i needed to see my eyes are still leaking but who cares my darling standing up with legs attached and they are going to involve me more so i dont get too down during phyios so all in all a fantastic day wonderfull day i love my darling even more and more night night one and all from lin and me hugs all round for everyone xxxxxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tennissmithy Posted October 28, 2008 Share Posted October 28, 2008 Hi Paul, it sounds like a fab day all round for you. It made me cry just reading your post and I wasn't even there! Good of them to get you involved as will give you more input into what will halp Lin to recover quicker. Keep going- but remember tomorrow is a different day and it could be that small step backwards. Lin is bound to be tired after all the excitement today Love and hugs Laura xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Paul that is fantastic news I am so pleased for both of you. Jess.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mojojojo Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Hiya Paul, I so was waiting for this post ..... i could tell how excited you were yesterday.... it made me smile no end...... my heart was fllled with joy for you. I hope it continues for you awwwww so happy for you xc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Hi Paul Cant stop smiling for you......so pleased! It is just wonderful news! Take care Love Tina xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Brilliant news Paul and a wonderful boost for you both! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Louise Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Great news! so pleased Paul. Take care Louise.x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skippy Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Hey Paul That's fantabulous news - have tears in my eyes am so happy for you. Sending you both a huge hug Love Sami xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ElaineW Posted October 29, 2008 Share Posted October 29, 2008 Paul - it's so lovely to read good news. You will be buying her some slippers soon to go with those new PJ's. Elaine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul99 Posted October 30, 2008 Author Share Posted October 30, 2008 hi everyone sorry its late i had a lovely day with lin she was very tired today not surprising really but i had lots of eye contact with her and i still get that feeling i want to jump into bed with her lol lin moved her hands quite a bit today and she moved her right hand as if to open it and allow me to put my hand under when she dropped her hand onto mine nice feeling believe me other than that lin slept most of the day except when i moved her bed to where it was yesterday and within five mins she did her first cough for over four weeks and filled the swedish nose up another good sign so all in all a very very nice day quite but very nice lin has the new slippers ready for her and i had to go shopping again for pants cotton still get funny looks why cant i go and have to buy a spanner lol please tommorow i think there going to strap her down again and stand her up if they do i will take the camera and ask karen to replace the one on lins profile with it mind you i love the one thats there anyway but to show how lins doing thats it for now if i remember anymore i will top up in the morning good night love to all xxx lin and paul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Paul more good news I am so pleased for you both. Jess.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Hi Paul So pleased another lovely day! How special for you and Lin......take care Love Tinaxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lauren D Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Hi Paul - more good news and thank you for sharing here - it's one place I feel "safe" to do so. Mine went off playing tennis but they said anything could've done it. Laurenx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tennissmithy Posted October 30, 2008 Share Posted October 30, 2008 Hi Paul- so pleased it was another good day xx laura xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul99 Posted October 31, 2008 Author Share Posted October 31, 2008 good morning all sorry this is late had a rough night lin not very happy yesterday think she had the hump not very coopertive seemed to be upset not sure why but it was nice to be with her and hold her hand lin didnt have any physio at all maybe thats why but she did sleep for most of the day but when she did wake up i got the most beautifull looks which made up for the non cooperation maybe the tilt table took a lot more out of her than i thought but hey its another day today so who knows whats it store for us not a lot more to say will let you know later hugs and cuddle to you all lin and paul xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted October 31, 2008 Share Posted October 31, 2008 Hi Paul I am sure it did make Lin very tired.....hope you both have a better day today...take care love Tinaxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted October 31, 2008 Share Posted October 31, 2008 Paul I expect it was very tiring yes hope you both had a better day today. Jess.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paul99 Posted October 31, 2008 Author Share Posted October 31, 2008 hi everyone just got back not a very nice day lin not with it and didnt look at me the phyios came and tried the tilt table again with my darling on and lin didnt even react at all not even though i was talking to her all day and massageing her feet and hands i tried everything to get her attention and failed it set me thinking horrible thoughts that this was all we were going to get it hurt so much the phyios have started a response chart to see if there is any response when they do anything and asked me if there was anything i had noticed lin doing there were quite a few but they couldnt tell me if lin had done it or whether it was automatic which pulled me down even more i know lin didnt want to be like this as we havealways spoke about it and we both didnt want to be like this ever i know lin has made all the running and recovered more on her own but the thoughts keep entering my head i dont like seeing her like this and i know she didnt want to be like this what do i do without lin whats the point of continueing living i hate feeling like this if she could give me a sign it would make all the difference and give me hope lins consultant has been on holiday to the last two weeks and i havent seen anyone come and see her when ive been there im going to kick up tommorow and ask whats going on the nurse has told me they may not downsize lins traci they may just take it out and see what happens which fills me with dread i just hope they have and ent chap there just in case im so sorry about bleating off but i love lin so much im so mixed up and the thoughts just keep comming into my head over the last few days and i want to get rid of them but they keep comming back i dont want to lose hope am i wrong sorry good night from my darling lin and me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mojojojo Posted November 1, 2008 Share Posted November 1, 2008 Paul it's such a normal response to feel as you do at times. I know how you feel. There must be days where you feel so helpless and there seems little hope... but the fact is Lin is still here with you, and like in my last post there is a reason she is fighting on. You have every right to feel the way you do, no one here would want to Lin to suffer and at times you feel like she is.... much like my mum locked in a world. You must wonder daily what the next day is going to hold. But today you have her close to you. Cherish her. I'm here as that shoulder to cry on. God know's ive cred many many tears.... Sending you both cuddles and my prayers are with you xxxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jess Posted November 1, 2008 Share Posted November 1, 2008 Paul you mustn't give up I am so sure Lin will get better and I know she knows your there. Please stay strong for her she is gonna need you so much as she starts to recover. Jess.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ElaineW Posted November 1, 2008 Share Posted November 1, 2008 JUst to say am thinking of you both lots, it is horrible to feel so despondent and so disappointing after a few good days.It is so upsetting watching someone you love so much go through all this and you must feel so weary with all the hospital visits - you haven't missed a day. I hope Lin has a better weekend but I understand and sympathise with you so much reagrding her quality of life etc It just destoys you. I hope you get some uplifting news today. Elaine xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina Posted November 1, 2008 Share Posted November 1, 2008 Hi Paul As the others have all said....it is so hard when you feel helpless and there seems no hope.....hang in there, really hope you have a better day today.....thoughts and prayers are with you, love Tinaxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janet Posted November 1, 2008 Share Posted November 1, 2008 Hi Paul I can also only echo what the others have said really hope you have a better day with Lin today. Stay strong Paul my thought and prayers are with you. Janet x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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