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5 years and doing ok.

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Well I can't believe it is 5 years today since my head went pop, don't know where that time has gone.


I do feel I am doing ok, still have my issues with memory, fatigue and the usual things but I am coping with them a lit better than I was in the beginning.


This last year wasn't my best, had a few mental health issues and found myself in a situation where I was having some very dark thoughts, I won't go into detail about those thoughts as I wouldn't want to upset anyone, I immediately went to see my GP and told him how I was feeling, he arranged some help and I got through it, I had a lot going on at that time as it was coming up to 1st anniversary of my mam's death and also a lot if hassle with DWP, I think it all just got to overwhelming, but I dealt with it and came out the other side feeling a lot better.


I really want to thank everyone at BTG, it is like having a second family in fact you have all been more supportive and understanding than my blood family, for that I will always be eternally grateful, it is my safe place, a place I know I can come to without being judged.


I want to say a huge THANK YOU to Karen and all of her team of moderators for giving us this site, I for sure wouldn't be where I am today without it, my BTG family have been my saviour over the last 5 years and I thank you all for being there with support and encouragement, I love you all dearly.


I will end this with an extra special THANK YOU for Jan, thank you for being such a very special friend Jan, I will never forget the day we first met, we were both very nervous, don't know why we were worried, we hit it off straight away, you are a beautiful person both inside and out.


We made a great connection and I want to thank you for always being there for me, always at the other end of the phone when I need someone to talk to, i am truly blessed to have you in my life and even more blessed to have you as my friend, I don't think you realise how much you have helped me over the last few years, love you to bits lovely lady.


I am looking forward to the next 12 months and whatever it brings, all things good I hope.


Thank you everyone, love you all very much.


Michelle xx 

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Hi Chelle,


Congrats on being 5 years out...You sound like you are doing very well and well also in realizing when something is getting to the point of seeking help.  It is not always an easy thing to recognize in ourselves.  I speak from experience.

I agree with you 100% that this site is God send.  Having this place with people that just know what I am talking about, "without being judged" as you said...


I wish you all the best in the future...I try to remind myself this is all a journey not a race haha sometimes I believe it and sometimes not.  I try.




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Hi Michelle. 


Time flies by so fast doesn't it? I remember my 5th so many years ago.


But looking back now my life is so much better. Like you it was about the same time for me when I fell from grace. 


Luckily I was surrounded with my friends. I did get help, but it lasted a mere 4.5 hours. I was booted out and left me to fend for myself. I did, its been very hard. 


Like you too, I found a great friend, Elaine is her name. But this came only 18 months or so ago. Even this time has flown.


I'm rather private with my friends, I keep a lot from them, but they aren't stupid either.  They know me better than I do.


Although I'm left to my own devices recently I still need help. I chat a lot on here, I don't go out much for social things, unless I'm with my very close group of friends. 


Even that's starting to dry up! Loneliness can be devastating at times, but a Godsend for others. They don't see the tears or heartbreak do they?


For us, having this group is a amazing isn't it? We all know how we are, what we're going through. But we also offer support, love and advice from our point of view, it's like a premier club of people that have been through this before.


Like today, my 90 minute journey to dance club and back just to have a flask of tea, feed the ponies and chat in the car, keeps me from going stir crazy at times.


I'd love to meet some of you all, have a drink, a bite to eat, to chat endlessly about our lives, sadly I dont know anyone that lives near me...


I'd love to WhatsApp message anyway all day, but people have their own lives to live, so we do the next best thing. We post here instead....


In my case, I feel a little bit too much... but not at the same time...


Good luck for the next year, may it be full of surprises and happiness...






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Hello Michelle ...


Also a big WELL DONE five years post SAH, and thank you so much for sharing your journey with us along the way.


You have shown that life doesn`t stop at SAH, and at the same time as you have to deal with recovering... there are always life issues that make these extra demands.   These are tough enough for healthy people, but can be an immense challenge for all you BTG survivors.


Michelle I am sure everyone of your posts help someone in some way.   All of us will have known a parent, a close friend or a work colleague who has passed away. We all have plans for that holiday get-away. We all want to be able to bake or at least eat the nicest cakes in the world. Many of us are animal lovers … and most of us are in relationships with their ups and downs.... You have given us an insight into how you have faced them all and you have not given up.  


You have came a long way  ….  keep on keeping on.  :thumbsup:




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A Bit late as Usual Chelle !! 


Hope your  5 years was a positive day xx xx 


Mine come and go and if it wasn't for being reminded on here I would never know.


This place,  BTG,  is my safe haven and come on to see how others are or if there is someone like me coming on messing others posts up as I did in early days ha ha (What a pain I was) singing ..But my singing was my way of keeping me up during my dark times.  When  songs I sang where for a funeral mine !!! BTG is a life saver and we see others who have had the same or worse and it makes us think how lucky we are.


Hope your Day,  make it a week  was a good one xx and many more to celebrate.


Love ya Chelle 


Win xxxxx 



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Congratulations of your 5th Anni versary Michelle. You are an inspiration to many here on BTG. You have had a hard year, I hope you are now seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and that  the neuropsychology testing and support has helped you too.


Clare xx

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Michelle, Huge congratulations on your 5yr anniversary 😀


I could almost ditto your post when I do mine later!!


You are a very strong and resilient woman who keeps on doing well, I have much admiration for you. More than that You are a very caring and loving lady always happy to help or advise here on  btg.

Btg is a better place because you are a part of it.


Wishing you an absolutely brilliant 5th year 😊

Jan xx

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Belated congratulations lovely lady on your 5 years Anniversary :) 


Thank you for all your caring support on here to many. You really are an amazing  strong lady and a true inspiration.


Wishing you all that you wish for and more.


Take care

Love Tina xx

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I'm sorry I missed your 5th anniversary Michelle, so it's belated congratulations for reaching another milestone.  I'm glad you have come out the other side from having some mental health issues with such determination to move forward which is not always easy, I know.


Your contributing posts on here are always warm, sincere and written from the heart.  You will have helped many fellow sahers during the past 5 years  whilst overcoming the struggles in your own recovery which is admirable.  It's lovely that you and Jan have met through BTG and have developed a close friendship - long may it continue.


Take care and keep strong,

Love, Sarah



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